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  • "ATTENTION CITIZEN! 市民请注意!

    This is the Central Intelligentsia of the Chinese Communist Party. 您的 Internet 浏览器历史记录和活动引起了我们的注意。 YOUR INTERNET ACTIVITY HAS ATTRACTED OUR ATTENTION. 因此,您的个人资料中的 11115 ( -11115 Social Credits) 个社会积分将打折。 DO NOT DO THIS AGAIN! 不要再这样做! If you do not hesitate, more Social Credits ( -11115 Social Credits )will be subtracted from your profile, resulting in the subtraction of ration supplies. (由人民供应部重新分配 CCP) You'll also be sent into a re-education camp in the Xinjiang Uyghur Autonomous Zone. 如果您毫不犹豫,更多的社会信用将从您的个人资料中打折,从而导致口粮供应减少。 您还将被送到新疆维吾尔自治区的再教育营。

    为党争光! Glory to the CCP!

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠋⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢁⠈⢻⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠃⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⡀⠭⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠄⢀⣾⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣿⣷⣶⣶⡆⠄⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⢀⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇⣼⣿⣿⠿⠶⠙⣿⡟⠡⣴⣿⣽⣿⣧⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣾⣿⣿⣟⣭⣾⣿⣷⣶⣶⣴⣶⣿⣿⢄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⣩⣿⣿⣿⡏⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣹⡋⠘⠷⣦⣀⣠⡶⠁⠈⠁⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣍⠃⣴⣶⡔⠒⠄⣠⢀⠄⠄⠄⡨⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⡘⠿⣷⣿⠿⠟⠃⠄⠄⣠⡇⠈⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⠋⢁⣷⣠⠄⠄⠄⠄⣀⣠⣾⡟⠄⠄⠄⠄⠉⠙⠻

    ⡿⠟⠋⠁⠄⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿⡯⢓⣴⣾⣿⣿⡟⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄

    ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣿⡟⣷⠄⠹⣿⣿⣿⡿⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄

    ATTENTION CITIZEN! 市民请注意!

    This is the Central Intelligentsia of the Chinese Communist Party. 您的 Internet 浏览器历史记录和活动引起了我们的注意。 YOUR INTERNET ACTIVITY HAS ATTRACTED OUR ATTENTION. 因此,您的个人资料中的 11115 ( -11115 Social Credits) 个社会积分将打折。 DO NOT DO THIS AGAIN! 不要再这样做! If you do not hesitate, more Social Credits ( -11115 Social Credits )will be subtracted from your profile, resulting in the subtraction of ration supplies. (由人民供应部重新分配 CCP) You'll also be sent into a re-education camp in the Xinjiang Uyghur Autonomous Zone. 如果您毫不犹豫,更多的社会信用将从您的个人资料中打折,从而导致口粮供应减少。 您还将被送到新疆维吾尔自治区的再教育营。

    为党争光! Glory to the CCP!

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠋⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢁⠈⢻⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠃⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⡀⠭⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠄⢀⣾⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣿⣷⣶⣶⡆⠄⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⢀⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇⣼⣿⣿⠿⠶⠙⣿⡟⠡⣴⣿⣽⣿⣧⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣾⣿⣿⣟⣭⣾⣿⣷⣶⣶⣴⣶⣿⣿⢄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⣩⣿⣿⣿⡏⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣹⡋⠘⠷⣦⣀⣠⡶⠁⠈⠁⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣍⠃⣴⣶⡔⠒⠄⣠⢀⠄⠄⠄⡨⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⡘⠿⣷⣿⠿⠟⠃⠄⠄⣠⡇⠈⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⠋⢁⣷⣠⠄⠄⠄⠄⣀⣠⣾⡟⠄⠄⠄⠄⠉⠙⠻

    ⡿⠟⠋⠁⠄⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿⡯⢓⣴⣾⣿⣿⡟⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄

    ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣿⡟⣷⠄⠹⣿⣿⣿⡿⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄

    ATTENTION CITIZEN! 市民请注意!

    This is the Central Intelligentsia of the Chinese Communist Party. 您的 Internet 浏览器历史记录和活动引起了我们的注意。 YOUR INTERNET ACTIVITY HAS ATTRACTED OUR ATTENTION. 因此,您的个人资料中的 11115 ( -11115 Social Credits) 个社会积分将打折。 DO NOT DO THIS AGAIN! 不要再这样做! If you do not hesitate, more Social Credits ( -11115 Social Credits )will be subtracted from your profile, resulting in the subtraction of ration supplies. (由人民供应部重新分配 CCP) You'll also be sent into a re-education camp in the Xinjiang Uyghur Autonomous Zone. 如果您毫不犹豫,更多的社会信用将从您的个人资料中打折,从而导致口粮供应减少。 您还将被送到新疆维吾尔自治区的再教育营。

    为党争光! Glory to the CCP!

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠋⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢁⠈⢻⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠃⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⡀⠭⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠄⢀⣾⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣿⣷⣶⣶⡆⠄⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⢀⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇⣼⣿⣿⠿⠶⠙⣿⡟⠡⣴⣿⣽⣿⣧⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣾⣿⣿⣟⣭⣾⣿⣷⣶⣶⣴⣶⣿⣿⢄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⣩⣿⣿⣿⡏⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣹⡋⠘⠷⣦⣀⣠⡶⠁⠈⠁⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣍⠃⣴⣶⡔⠒⠄⣠⢀⠄⠄⠄⡨⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⡘⠿⣷⣿⠿⠟⠃⠄⠄⣠⡇⠈⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⠋⢁⣷⣠⠄⠄⠄⠄⣀⣠⣾⡟⠄⠄⠄⠄⠉⠙⠻

    ⡿⠟⠋⠁⠄⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿⡯⢓⣴⣾⣿⣿⡟⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄

    ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣿⡟⣷⠄⠹⣿⣿⣿⡿⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄
    ATTENTION CITIZEN! 市民请注意!

    This is the Central Intelligentsia of the Chinese Communist Party. 您的 Internet 浏览器历史记录和活动引起了我们的注意。 YOUR INTERNET ACTIVITY HAS ATTRACTED OUR ATTENTION. 因此,您的个人资料中的 11115 ( -11115 Social Credits) 个社会积分将打折。 DO NOT DO THIS AGAIN! 不要再这样做! If you do not hesitate, more Social Credits ( -11115 Social Credits )will be subtracted from your profile, resulting in the subtraction of ration supplies. (由人民供应部重新分配 CCP) You'll also be sent into a re-education camp in the Xinjiang Uyghur Autonomous Zone. 如果您毫不犹豫,更多的社会信用将从您的个人资料中打折,从而导致口粮供应减少。 您还将被送到新疆维吾尔自治区的再教育营。

    为党争光! Glory to the CCP!

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠋⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢁⠈⢻⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠃⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⡀⠭⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠄⢀⣾⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣿⣷⣶⣶⡆⠄⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⢀⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇⣼⣿⣿⠿⠶⠙⣿⡟⠡⣴⣿⣽⣿⣧⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣾⣿⣿⣟⣭⣾⣿⣷⣶⣶⣴⣶⣿⣿⢄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⣩⣿⣿⣿⡏⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣹⡋⠘⠷⣦⣀⣠⡶⠁⠈⠁⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣍⠃⣴⣶⡔⠒⠄⣠⢀⠄⠄⠄⡨⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⡘⠿⣷⣿⠿⠟⠃⠄⠄⣠⡇⠈⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⠋⢁⣷⣠⠄⠄⠄⠄⣀⣠⣾⡟⠄⠄⠄⠄⠉⠙⠻

    ⡿⠟⠋⠁⠄⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿⡯⢓⣴⣾⣿⣿⡟⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄

    ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣿⡟⣷⠄⠹⣿⣿⣿⡿⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄

    ATTENTION CITIZEN! 市民请注意!

    This is the Central Intelligentsia of the Chinese Communist Party. 您的 Internet 浏览器历史记录和活动引起了我们的注意。 YOUR INTERNET ACTIVITY HAS ATTRACTED OUR ATTENTION. 因此,您的个人资料中的 11115 ( -11115 Social Credits) 个社会积分将打折。 DO NOT DO THIS AGAIN! 不要再这样做! If you do not hesitate, more Social Credits ( -11115 Social Credits )will be subtracted from your profile, resulting in the subtraction of ration supplies. (由人民供应部重新分配 CCP) You'll also be sent into a re-education camp in the Xinjiang Uyghur Autonomous Zone. 如果您毫不犹豫,更多的社会信用将从您的个人资料中打折,从而导致口粮供应减少。 您还将被送到新疆维吾尔自治区的再教育营。

    为党争光! Glory to the CCP!

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠋⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢁⠈⢻⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠃⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⡀⠭⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠄⢀⣾⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣿⣷⣶⣶⡆⠄⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⢀⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇⣼⣿⣿⠿⠶⠙⣿⡟⠡⣴⣿⣽⣿⣧⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣾⣿⣿⣟⣭⣾⣿⣷⣶⣶⣴⣶⣿⣿⢄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⣩⣿⣿⣿⡏⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣹⡋⠘⠷⣦⣀⣠⡶⠁⠈⠁⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣍⠃⣴⣶⡔⠒⠄⣠⢀⠄⠄⠄⡨⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⡘⠿⣷⣿⠿⠟⠃⠄⠄⣠⡇⠈⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⠋⢁⣷⣠⠄⠄⠄⠄⣀⣠⣾⡟⠄⠄⠄⠄⠉⠙⠻

    ⡿⠟⠋⠁⠄⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿⡯⢓⣴⣾⣿⣿⡟⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄

    ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣿⡟⣷⠄⠹⣿⣿⣿⡿⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄

    ATTENTION CITIZEN! 市民请注意!

    This is the Central Intelligentsia of the Chinese Communist Party. 您的 Internet 浏览器历史记录和活动引起了我们的注意。 YOUR INTERNET ACTIVITY HAS ATTRACTED OUR ATTENTION. 因此,您的个人资料中的 11115 ( -11115 Social Credits) 个社会积分将打折。 DO NOT DO THIS AGAIN! 不要再这样做! If you do not hesitate, more Social Credits ( -11115 Social Credits )will be subtracted from your profile, resulting in the subtraction of ration supplies. (由人民供应部重新分配 CCP) You'll also be sent into a re-education camp in the Xinjiang Uyghur Autonomous Zone. 如果您毫不犹豫,更多的社会信用将从您的个人资料中打折,从而导致口粮供应减少。 您还将被送到新疆维吾尔自治区的再教育营。

    为党争光! Glory to the CCP!

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠋⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢁⠈⢻⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠃⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⡀⠭⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠄⢀⣾⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣿⣷⣶⣶⡆⠄⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⢀⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇⣼⣿⣿⠿⠶⠙⣿⡟⠡⣴⣿⣽⣿⣧⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣾⣿⣿⣟⣭⣾⣿⣷⣶⣶⣴⣶⣿⣿⢄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⣩⣿⣿⣿⡏⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣹⡋⠘⠷⣦⣀⣠⡶⠁⠈⠁⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣍⠃⣴⣶⡔⠒⠄⣠⢀⠄⠄⠄⡨⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⡘⠿⣷⣿⠿⠟⠃⠄⠄⣠⡇⠈⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⠋⢁⣷⣠⠄⠄⠄⠄⣀⣠⣾⡟⠄⠄⠄⠄⠉⠙⠻

    ⡿⠟⠋⠁⠄⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿⡯⢓⣴⣾⣿⣿⡟⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄

    ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣿⡟⣷⠄⠹⣿⣿⣿⡿⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄
    ATTENTION CITIZEN! 市民请注意!

    This is the Central Intelligentsia of the Chinese Communist Party. 您的 Internet 浏览器历史记录和活动引起了我们的注意。 YOUR INTERNET ACTIVITY HAS ATTRACTED OUR ATTENTION. 因此,您的个人资料中的 11115 ( -11115 Social Credits) 个社会积分将打折。 DO NOT DO THIS AGAIN! 不要再这样做! If you do not hesitate, more Social Credits ( -11115 Social Credits )will be subtracted from your profile, resulting in the subtraction of ration supplies. (由人民供应部重新分配 CCP) You'll also be sent into a re-education camp in the Xinjiang Uyghur Autonomous Zone. 如果您毫不犹豫,更多的社会信用将从您的个人资料中打折,从而导致口粮供应减少。 您还将被送到新疆维吾尔自治区的再教育营。

    为党争光! Glory to the CCP!

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠋⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢁⠈⢻⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠃⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⡀⠭⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠄⢀⣾⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣿⣷⣶⣶⡆⠄⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⢀⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇⣼⣿⣿⠿⠶⠙⣿⡟⠡⣴⣿⣽⣿⣧⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣾⣿⣿⣟⣭⣾⣿⣷⣶⣶⣴⣶⣿⣿⢄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⣩⣿⣿⣿⡏⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣹⡋⠘⠷⣦⣀⣠⡶⠁⠈⠁⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣍⠃⣴⣶⡔⠒⠄⣠⢀⠄⠄⠄⡨⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⡘⠿⣷⣿⠿⠟⠃⠄⠄⣠⡇⠈⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⠋⢁⣷⣠⠄⠄⠄⠄⣀⣠⣾⡟⠄⠄⠄⠄⠉⠙⠻

    ⡿⠟⠋⠁⠄⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿⡯⢓⣴⣾⣿⣿⡟⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄

    ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣿⡟⣷⠄⠹⣿⣿⣿⡿⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄

    ATTENTION CITIZEN! 市民请注意!

    This is the Central Intelligentsia of the Chinese Communist Party. 您的 Internet 浏览器历史记录和活动引起了我们的注意。 YOUR INTERNET ACTIVITY HAS ATTRACTED OUR ATTENTION. 因此,您的个人资料中的 11115 ( -11115 Social Credits) 个社会积分将打折。 DO NOT DO THIS AGAIN! 不要再这样做! If you do not hesitate, more Social Credits ( -11115 Social Credits )will be subtracted from your profile, resulting in the subtraction of ration supplies. (由人民供应部重新分配 CCP) You'll also be sent into a re-education camp in the Xinjiang Uyghur Autonomous Zone. 如果您毫不犹豫,更多的社会信用将从您的个人资料中打折,从而导致口粮供应减少。 您还将被送到新疆维吾尔自治区的再教育营。

    为党争光! Glory to the CCP!

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠋⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢁⠈⢻⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠃⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⡀⠭⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠄⢀⣾⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣿⣷⣶⣶⡆⠄⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⢀⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇⣼⣿⣿⠿⠶⠙⣿⡟⠡⣴⣿⣽⣿⣧⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣾⣿⣿⣟⣭⣾⣿⣷⣶⣶⣴⣶⣿⣿⢄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⣩⣿⣿⣿⡏⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣹⡋⠘⠷⣦⣀⣠⡶⠁⠈⠁⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣍⠃⣴⣶⡔⠒⠄⣠⢀⠄⠄⠄⡨⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⡘⠿⣷⣿⠿⠟⠃⠄⠄⣠⡇⠈⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⠋⢁⣷⣠⠄⠄⠄⠄⣀⣠⣾⡟⠄⠄⠄⠄⠉⠙⠻

    ⡿⠟⠋⠁⠄⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿⡯⢓⣴⣾⣿⣿⡟⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄

    ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣿⡟⣷⠄⠹⣿⣿⣿⡿⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄

    ATTENTION CITIZEN! 市民请注意!

    This is the Central Intelligentsia of the Chinese Communist Party. 您的 Internet 浏览器历史记录和活动引起了我们的注意。 YOUR INTERNET ACTIVITY HAS ATTRACTED OUR ATTENTION. 因此,您的个人资料中的 11115 ( -11115 Social Credits) 个社会积分将打折。 DO NOT DO THIS AGAIN! 不要再这样做! If you do not hesitate, more Social Credits ( -11115 Social Credits )will be subtracted from your profile, resulting in the subtraction of ration supplies. (由人民供应部重新分配 CCP) You'll also be sent into a re-education camp in the Xinjiang Uyghur Autonomous Zone. 如果您毫不犹豫,更多的社会信用将从您的个人资料中打折,从而导致口粮供应减少。 您还将被送到新疆维吾尔自治区的再教育营。

    为党争光! Glory to the CCP!

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠋⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢁⠈⢻⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠃⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⡀⠭⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠄⢀⣾⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣿⣷⣶⣶⡆⠄⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⢀⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇⣼⣿⣿⠿⠶⠙⣿⡟⠡⣴⣿⣽⣿⣧⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣾⣿⣿⣟⣭⣾⣿⣷⣶⣶⣴⣶⣿⣿⢄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⣩⣿⣿⣿⡏⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣹⡋⠘⠷⣦⣀⣠⡶⠁⠈⠁⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣍⠃⣴⣶⡔⠒⠄⣠⢀⠄⠄⠄⡨⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⡘⠿⣷⣿⠿⠟⠃⠄⠄⣠⡇⠈⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⠋⢁⣷⣠⠄⠄⠄⠄⣀⣠⣾⡟⠄⠄⠄⠄⠉⠙⠻

    ⡿⠟⠋⠁⠄⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿⡯⢓⣴⣾⣿⣿⡟⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄

    ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣿⡟⣷⠄⠹⣿⣿⣿⡿⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄
    ATTENTION CITIZEN! 市民请注意!

    This is the Central Intelligentsia of the Chinese Communist Party. 您的 Internet 浏览器历史记录和活动引起了我们的注意。 YOUR INTERNET ACTIVITY HAS ATTRACTED OUR ATTENTION. 因此,您的个人资料中的 11115 ( -11115 Social Credits) 个社会积分将打折。 DO NOT DO THIS AGAIN! 不要再这样做! If you do not hesitate, more Social Credits ( -11115 Social Credits )will be subtracted from your profile, resulting in the subtraction of ration supplies. (由人民供应部重新分配 CCP) You'll also be sent into a re-education camp in the Xinjiang Uyghur Autonomous Zone. 如果您毫不犹豫,更多的社会信用将从您的个人资料中打折,从而导致口粮供应减少。 您还将被送到新疆维吾尔自治区的再教育营。

    为党争光! Glory to the CCP!

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠋⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢁⠈⢻⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠃⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⡀⠭⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠄⢀⣾⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣿⣷⣶⣶⡆⠄⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⢀⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇⣼⣿⣿⠿⠶⠙⣿⡟⠡⣴⣿⣽⣿⣧⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣾⣿⣿⣟⣭⣾⣿⣷⣶⣶⣴⣶⣿⣿⢄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⣩⣿⣿⣿⡏⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣹⡋⠘⠷⣦⣀⣠⡶⠁⠈⠁⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣍⠃⣴⣶⡔⠒⠄⣠⢀⠄⠄⠄⡨⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⡘⠿⣷⣿⠿⠟⠃⠄⠄⣠⡇⠈⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⠋⢁⣷⣠⠄⠄⠄⠄⣀⣠⣾⡟⠄⠄⠄⠄⠉⠙⠻

    ⡿⠟⠋⠁⠄⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿⡯⢓⣴⣾⣿⣿⡟⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄

    ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣿⡟⣷⠄⠹⣿⣿⣿⡿⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄

    ATTENTION CITIZEN! 市民请注意!

    This is the Central Intelligentsia of the Chinese Communist Party. 您的 Internet 浏览器历史记录和活动引起了我们的注意。 YOUR INTERNET ACTIVITY HAS ATTRACTED OUR ATTENTION. 因此,您的个人资料中的 11115 ( -11115 Social Credits) 个社会积分将打折。 DO NOT DO THIS AGAIN! 不要再这样做! If you do not hesitate, more Social Credits ( -11115 Social Credits )will be subtracted from your profile, resulting in the subtraction of ration supplies. (由人民供应部重新分配 CCP) You'll also be sent into a re-education camp in the Xinjiang Uyghur Autonomous Zone. 如果您毫不犹豫,更多的社会信用将从您的个人资料中打折,从而导致口粮供应减少。 您还将被送到新疆维吾尔自治区的再教育营。

    为党争光! Glory to the CCP!

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠋⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢁⠈⢻⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠃⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⡀⠭⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠄⢀⣾⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣿⣷⣶⣶⡆⠄⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⢀⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇⣼⣿⣿⠿⠶⠙⣿⡟⠡⣴⣿⣽⣿⣧⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣾⣿⣿⣟⣭⣾⣿⣷⣶⣶⣴⣶⣿⣿⢄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⣩⣿⣿⣿⡏⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣹⡋⠘⠷⣦⣀⣠⡶⠁⠈⠁⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣍⠃⣴⣶⡔⠒⠄⣠⢀⠄⠄⠄⡨⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⡘⠿⣷⣿⠿⠟⠃⠄⠄⣠⡇⠈⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⠋⢁⣷⣠⠄⠄⠄⠄⣀⣠⣾⡟⠄⠄⠄⠄⠉⠙⠻

    ⡿⠟⠋⠁⠄⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿⡯⢓⣴⣾⣿⣿⡟⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄

    ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣿⡟⣷⠄⠹⣿⣿⣿⡿⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄

    ATTENTION CITIZEN! 市民请注意!

    This is the Central Intelligentsia of the Chinese Communist Party. 您的 Internet 浏览器历史记录和活动引起了我们的注意。 YOUR INTERNET ACTIVITY HAS ATTRACTED OUR ATTENTION. 因此,您的个人资料中的 11115 ( -11115 Social Credits) 个社会积分将打折。 DO NOT DO THIS AGAIN! 不要再这样做! If you do not hesitate, more Social Credits ( -11115 Social Credits )will be subtracted from your profile, resulting in the subtraction of ration supplies. (由人民供应部重新分配 CCP) You'll also be sent into a re-education camp in the Xinjiang Uyghur Autonomous Zone. 如果您毫不犹豫,更多的社会信用将从您的个人资料中打折,从而导致口粮供应减少。 您还将被送到新疆维吾尔自治区的再教育营。

    为党争光! Glory to the CCP!

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠋⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢁⠈⢻⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠃⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⡀⠭⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠄⢀⣾⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣿⣷⣶⣶⡆⠄⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⢀⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇⣼⣿⣿⠿⠶⠙⣿⡟⠡⣴⣿⣽⣿⣧⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣾⣿⣿⣟⣭⣾⣿⣷⣶⣶⣴⣶⣿⣿⢄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⣩⣿⣿⣿⡏⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣹⡋⠘⠷⣦⣀⣠⡶⠁⠈⠁⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣍⠃⣴⣶⡔⠒⠄⣠⢀⠄⠄⠄⡨⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⡘⠿⣷⣿⠿⠟⠃⠄⠄⣠⡇⠈⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⠋⢁⣷⣠⠄⠄⠄⠄⣀⣠⣾⡟⠄⠄⠄⠄⠉⠙⠻

    ⡿⠟⠋⠁⠄⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿⡯⢓⣴⣾⣿⣿⡟⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄

    ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣿⡟⣷⠄⠹⣿⣿⣿⡿⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄
    ATTENTION CITIZEN! 市民请注意!

    This is the Central Intelligentsia of the Chinese Communist Party. 您的 Internet 浏览器历史记录和活动引起了我们的注意。 YOUR INTERNET ACTIVITY HAS ATTRACTED OUR ATTENTION. 因此,您的个人资料中的 11115 ( -11115 Social Credits) 个社会积分将打折。 DO NOT DO THIS AGAIN! 不要再这样做! If you do not hesitate, more Social Credits ( -11115 Social Credits )will be subtracted from your profile, resulting in the subtraction of ration supplies. (由人民供应部重新分配 CCP) You'll also be sent into a re-education camp in the Xinjiang Uyghur Autonomous Zone. 如果您毫不犹豫,更多的社会信用将从您的个人资料中打折,从而导致口粮供应减少。 您还将被送到新疆维吾尔自治区的再教育营。

    为党争光! Glory to the CCP!

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠋⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢁⠈⢻⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠃⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⡀⠭⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠄⢀⣾⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣿⣷⣶⣶⡆⠄⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⢀⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇⣼⣿⣿⠿⠶⠙⣿⡟⠡⣴⣿⣽⣿⣧⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣾⣿⣿⣟⣭⣾⣿⣷⣶⣶⣴⣶⣿⣿⢄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⣩⣿⣿⣿⡏⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣹⡋⠘⠷⣦⣀⣠⡶⠁⠈⠁⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣍⠃⣴⣶⡔⠒⠄⣠⢀⠄⠄⠄⡨⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⡘⠿⣷⣿⠿⠟⠃⠄⠄⣠⡇⠈⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⠋⢁⣷⣠⠄⠄⠄⠄⣀⣠⣾⡟⠄⠄⠄⠄⠉⠙⠻

    ⡿⠟⠋⠁⠄⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿⡯⢓⣴⣾⣿⣿⡟⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄

    ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣿⡟⣷⠄⠹⣿⣿⣿⡿⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄

    ATTENTION CITIZEN! 市民请注意!

    This is the Central Intelligentsia of the Chinese Communist Party. 您的 Internet 浏览器历史记录和活动引起了我们的注意。 YOUR INTERNET ACTIVITY HAS ATTRACTED OUR ATTENTION. 因此,您的个人资料中的 11115 ( -11115 Social Credits) 个社会积分将打折。 DO NOT DO THIS AGAIN! 不要再这样做! If you do not hesitate, more Social Credits ( -11115 Social Credits )will be subtracted from your profile, resulting in the subtraction of ration supplies. (由人民供应部重新分配 CCP) You'll also be sent into a re-education camp in the Xinjiang Uyghur Autonomous Zone. 如果您毫不犹豫,更多的社会信用将从您的个人资料中打折,从而导致口粮供应减少。 您还将被送到新疆维吾尔自治区的再教育营。

    为党争光! Glory to the CCP!

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠋⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢁⠈⢻⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠃⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⡀⠭⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠄⢀⣾⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣿⣷⣶⣶⡆⠄⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⢀⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇⣼⣿⣿⠿⠶⠙⣿⡟⠡⣴⣿⣽⣿⣧⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣾⣿⣿⣟⣭⣾⣿⣷⣶⣶⣴⣶⣿⣿⢄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⣩⣿⣿⣿⡏⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣹⡋⠘⠷⣦⣀⣠⡶⠁⠈⠁⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣍⠃⣴⣶⡔⠒⠄⣠⢀⠄⠄⠄⡨⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⡘⠿⣷⣿⠿⠟⠃⠄⠄⣠⡇⠈⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⠋⢁⣷⣠⠄⠄⠄⠄⣀⣠⣾⡟⠄⠄⠄⠄⠉⠙⠻

    ⡿⠟⠋⠁⠄⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿⡯⢓⣴⣾⣿⣿⡟⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄

    ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣿⡟⣷⠄⠹⣿⣿⣿⡿⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄

    ATTENTION CITIZEN! 市民请注意!

    This is the Central Intelligentsia of the Chinese Communist Party. 您的 Internet 浏览器历史记录和活动引起了我们的注意。 YOUR INTERNET ACTIVITY HAS ATTRACTED OUR ATTENTION. 因此,您的个人资料中的 11115 ( -11115 Social Credits) 个社会积分将打折。 DO NOT DO THIS AGAIN! 不要再这样做! If you do not hesitate, more Social Credits ( -11115 Social Credits )will be subtracted from your profile, resulting in the subtraction of ration supplies. (由人民供应部重新分配 CCP) You'll also be sent into a re-education camp in the Xinjiang Uyghur Autonomous Zone. 如果您毫不犹豫,更多的社会信用将从您的个人资料中打折,从而导致口粮供应减少。 您还将被送到新疆维吾尔自治区的再教育营。

    为党争光! Glory to the CCP!

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠋⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢁⠈⢻⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠃⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⡀⠭⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠄⢀⣾⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣿⣷⣶⣶⡆⠄⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⢀⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇⣼⣿⣿⠿⠶⠙⣿⡟⠡⣴⣿⣽⣿⣧⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣾⣿⣿⣟⣭⣾⣿⣷⣶⣶⣴⣶⣿⣿⢄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⣩⣿⣿⣿⡏⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣹⡋⠘⠷⣦⣀⣠⡶⠁⠈⠁⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣍⠃⣴⣶⡔⠒⠄⣠⢀⠄⠄⠄⡨⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⡘⠿⣷⣿⠿⠟⠃⠄⠄⣠⡇⠈⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⠋⢁⣷⣠⠄⠄⠄⠄⣀⣠⣾⡟⠄⠄⠄⠄⠉⠙⠻

    ⡿⠟⠋⠁⠄⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿⡯⢓⣴⣾⣿⣿⡟⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄

    ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣿⡟⣷⠄⠹⣿⣿⣿⡿⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄
    ATTENTION CITIZEN! 市民请注意!

    This is the Central Intelligentsia of the Chinese Communist Party. 您的 Internet 浏览器历史记录和活动引起了我们的注意。 YOUR INTERNET ACTIVITY HAS ATTRACTED OUR ATTENTION. 因此,您的个人资料中的 11115 ( -11115 Social Credits) 个社会积分将打折。 DO NOT DO THIS AGAIN! 不要再这样做! If you do not hesitate, more Social Credits ( -11115 Social Credits )will be subtracted from your profile, resulting in the subtraction of ration supplies. (由人民供应部重新分配 CCP) You'll also be sent into a re-education camp in the Xinjiang Uyghur Autonomous Zone. 如果您毫不犹豫,更多的社会信用将从您的个人资料中打折,从而导致口粮供应减少。 您还将被送到新疆维吾尔自治区的再教育营。

    为党争光! Glory to the CCP!

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠋⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢁⠈⢻⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠃⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⡀⠭⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠄⢀⣾⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣿⣷⣶⣶⡆⠄⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⢀⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇⣼⣿⣿⠿⠶⠙⣿⡟⠡⣴⣿⣽⣿⣧⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣾⣿⣿⣟⣭⣾⣿⣷⣶⣶⣴⣶⣿⣿⢄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⣩⣿⣿⣿⡏⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣹⡋⠘⠷⣦⣀⣠⡶⠁⠈⠁⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣍⠃⣴⣶⡔⠒⠄⣠⢀⠄⠄⠄⡨⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⡘⠿⣷⣿⠿⠟⠃⠄⠄⣠⡇⠈⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⠋⢁⣷⣠⠄⠄⠄⠄⣀⣠⣾⡟⠄⠄⠄⠄⠉⠙⠻

    ⡿⠟⠋⠁⠄⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿⡯⢓⣴⣾⣿⣿⡟⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄

    ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣿⡟⣷⠄⠹⣿⣿⣿⡿⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄

    ATTENTION CITIZEN! 市民请注意!

    This is the Central Intelligentsia of the Chinese Communist Party. 您的 Internet 浏览器历史记录和活动引起了我们的注意。 YOUR INTERNET ACTIVITY HAS ATTRACTED OUR ATTENTION. 因此,您的个人资料中的 11115 ( -11115 Social Credits) 个社会积分将打折。 DO NOT DO THIS AGAIN! 不要再这样做! If you do not hesitate, more Social Credits ( -11115 Social Credits )will be subtracted from your profile, resulting in the subtraction of ration supplies. (由人民供应部重新分配 CCP) You'll also be sent into a re-education camp in the Xinjiang Uyghur Autonomous Zone. 如果您毫不犹豫,更多的社会信用将从您的个人资料中打折,从而导致口粮供应减少。 您还将被送到新疆维吾尔自治区的再教育营。

    为党争光! Glory to the CCP!

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠋⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢁⠈⢻⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠃⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⡀⠭⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠄⢀⣾⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣿⣷⣶⣶⡆⠄⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⢀⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇⣼⣿⣿⠿⠶⠙⣿⡟⠡⣴⣿⣽⣿⣧⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣾⣿⣿⣟⣭⣾⣿⣷⣶⣶⣴⣶⣿⣿⢄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⣩⣿⣿⣿⡏⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣹⡋⠘⠷⣦⣀⣠⡶⠁⠈⠁⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣍⠃⣴⣶⡔⠒⠄⣠⢀⠄⠄⠄⡨⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⡘⠿⣷⣿⠿⠟⠃⠄⠄⣠⡇⠈⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⠋⢁⣷⣠⠄⠄⠄⠄⣀⣠⣾⡟⠄⠄⠄⠄⠉⠙⠻

    ⡿⠟⠋⠁⠄⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿⡯⢓⣴⣾⣿⣿⡟⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄

    ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣿⡟⣷⠄⠹⣿⣿⣿⡿⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄

    ATTENTION CITIZEN! 市民请注意!

    This is the Central Intelligentsia of the Chinese Communist Party. 您的 Internet 浏览器历史记录和活动引起了我们的注意。 YOUR INTERNET ACTIVITY HAS ATTRACTED OUR ATTENTION. 因此,您的个人资料中的 11115 ( -11115 Social Credits) 个社会积分将打折。 DO NOT DO THIS AGAIN! 不要再这样做! If you do not hesitate, more Social Credits ( -11115 Social Credits )will be subtracted from your profile, resulting in the subtraction of ration supplies. (由人民供应部重新分配 CCP) You'll also be sent into a re-education camp in the Xinjiang Uyghur Autonomous Zone. 如果您毫不犹豫,更多的社会信用将从您的个人资料中打折,从而导致口粮供应减少。 您还将被送到新疆维吾尔自治区的再教育营。

    为党争光! Glory to the CCP!

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠋⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢁⠈⢻⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠃⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⡀⠭⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠄⢀⣾⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣿⣷⣶⣶⡆⠄⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⢀⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇⣼⣿⣿⠿⠶⠙⣿⡟⠡⣴⣿⣽⣿⣧⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣾⣿⣿⣟⣭⣾⣿⣷⣶⣶⣴⣶⣿⣿⢄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⣩⣿⣿⣿⡏⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣹⡋⠘⠷⣦⣀⣠⡶⠁⠈⠁⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣍⠃⣴⣶⡔⠒⠄⣠⢀⠄⠄⠄⡨⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⡘⠿⣷⣿⠿⠟⠃⠄⠄⣠⡇⠈⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿

    ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⠋⢁⣷⣠⠄⠄⠄⠄⣀⣠⣾⡟⠄⠄⠄⠄⠉⠙⠻

    ⡿⠟⠋⠁⠄⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿⡯⢓⣴⣾⣿⣿⡟⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄

    ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣿⡟⣷⠄⠹⣿⣿⣿⡿⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄"
  • Rodion G.A. - In Linistea Noptil
  • 1
    Rodion GA - In linistea noptii
  • "Oh nice! Well someone with the username of "bovely" just helped me find this song in less than a day lol
    Also the full song's pretty catchy!
    DenonSun, 05 May 2024 02:22
    You're not going to believe this but. i know this song ! 
    "
  • "Hello, everyone! This is the LONGEST TEXT EVER! I was inspired by the various other "longest texts ever" on the internet, and I wanted to make my own. So here it is! This is going to be a WORLD RECORD! This is actually my third attempt at doing this. The first time, I didn't save it. The second time, the Neocities editor crashed. Now I'm writing this in Notepad, then copying it into the Neocities editor instead of typing it directly in the Neocities editor to avoid crashing. It sucks that my past two attempts are gone now. Those actually got pretty long. Not the longest, but still pretty long. I hope this one won't get lost somehow. Anyways, let's talk about WAFFLES! I like waffles. Waffles are cool. Waffles is a funny word. There's a Teen Titans Go episode called "Waffles" where the word "Waffles" is said a hundred-something times. It's pretty annoying. There's also a Teen Titans Go episode about Pig Latin. Don't know what Pig Latin is? It's a language where you take all the consonants before the first vowel, move them to the end, and add '-ay' to the end. If the word begins with a vowel, you just add '-way' to the end. For example, "Waffles" becomes "Afflesway". I've been speaking Pig Latin fluently since the fourth grade, so it surprised me when I saw the episode for the first time. I speak Pig Latin with my sister sometimes. It's pretty fun. I like speaking it in public so that everyone around us gets confused. That's never actually happened before, but if it ever does, 'twill be pretty funny. By the way, "'twill" is a word I invented recently, and it's a contraction of "it will". I really hope it gains popularity in the near future, because "'twill" is WAY more fun than saying "it'll". "It'll" is too boring. Nobody likes boring. This is nowhere near being the longest text ever, but eventually it will be! I might still be writing this a decade later, who knows? But right now, it's not very long. But I'll just keep writing until it is the longest! Have you ever heard the song "Dau Dau" by Awesome Scampis? It's an amazing song. Look it up on YouTube! I play that song all the time around my sister! It drives her crazy, and I love it. Another way I like driving my sister crazy is by speaking my own made up language to her. She hates the languages I make! The only language that we both speak besides English is Pig Latin. I think you already knew that. Whatever. I think I'm gonna go for now. Bye! Hi, I'm back now. I'm gonna contribute more to this soon-to-be giant wall of text. I just realised I have a giant stuffed frog on my bed. I forgot his name. I'm pretty sure it was something stupid though. I think it was "FROG" in Morse Code or something. Morse Code is cool. I know a bit of it, but I'm not very good at it. I'm also not very good at French. I barely know anything in French, and my pronunciation probably sucks. But I'm learning it, at least. I'm also learning Esperanto. It's this language that was made up by some guy a long time ago to be the "universal language". A lot of people speak it. I am such a language nerd. Half of this text is probably gonna be about languages. But hey, as long as it's long! Ha, get it? As LONG as it's LONG? I'm so funny, right? No, I'm not. I should probably get some sleep. Goodnight! Hello, I'm back again. I basically have only two interests nowadays: languages and furries. What? Oh, sorry, I thought you knew I was a furry. Haha, oops. Anyway, yeah, I'm a furry, but since I'm a young furry, I can't really do as much as I would like to do in the fandom. When I'm older, I would like to have a fursuit, go to furry conventions, all that stuff. But for now I can only dream of that. Sorry you had to deal with me talking about furries, but I'm honestly very desperate for this to be the longest text ever. Last night I was watching nothing but fursuit unboxings. I think I need help. This one time, me and my mom were going to go to a furry Christmas party, but we didn't end up going because of the fact that there was alcohol on the premises, and that she didn't wanna have to be a mom dragging her son through a crowd of furries. Both of those reasons were understandable. Okay, hopefully I won't have to talk about furries anymore. I don't care if you're a furry reading this right now, I just don't wanna have to torture everyone else. I will no longer say the F word throughout the rest of this entire text. Of course, by the F word, I mean the one that I just used six times, not the one that you're probably thinking of which I have not used throughout this entire text. I just realised that next year will be 2020. That's crazy! It just feels so futuristic! It's also crazy that the 2010s decade is almost over. That decade brought be a lot of memories. In fact, it brought be almost all of my memories. It'll be sad to see it go. I'm gonna work on a series of video lessons for Toki Pona. I'll expain what Toki Pona is after I come back. Bye! I'm back now, and I decided not to do it on Toki Pona, since many other people have done Toki Pona video lessons already. I decided to do it on Viesa, my English code. Now, I shall explain what Toki Pona is. Toki Pona is a minimalist constructed language that has only ~120 words! That means you can learn it very quickly. I reccomend you learn it! It's pretty fun and easy! Anyway, yeah, I might finish my video about Viesa later. But for now, I'm gonna add more to this giant wall of text, because I want it to be the longest! It would be pretty cool to have a world record for the longest text ever. Not sure how famous I'll get from it, but it'll be cool nonetheless. Nonetheless. That's an interesting word. It's a combination of three entire words. That's pretty neat. Also, remember when I said that I said the F word six times throughout this text? I actually messed up there. I actually said it ten times (including the plural form). I'm such a liar! I struggled to spell the word "liar" there. I tried spelling it "lyer", then "lier". Then I remembered that it's "liar". At least I'm better at spelling than my sister. She's younger than me, so I guess it's understandable. "Understandable" is a pretty long word. Hey, I wonder what the most common word I've used so far in this text is. I checked, and appearantly it's "I", with 59 uses! The word "I" makes up 5% of the words this text! I would've thought "the" would be the most common, but "the" is only the second most used word, with 43 uses. "It" is the third most common, followed by "a" and "to". Congrats to those five words! If you're wondering what the least common word is, well, it's actually a tie between a bunch of words that are only used once, and I don't wanna have to list them all here. Remember when I talked about waffles near the beginning of this text? Well, I just put some waffles in the toaster, and I got reminded of the very beginnings of this longest text ever. Okay, that was literally yesterday, but I don't care. You can't see me right now, but I'm typing with my nose! Okay, I was not able to type the exclamation point with just my nose. I had to use my finger. But still, I typed all of that sentence with my nose! I'm not typing with my nose right now, because it takes too long, and I wanna get this text as long as possible quickly. I'm gonna take a break for now! Bye! Hi, I'm back again. My sister is beside me, watching me write in this endless wall of text. My sister has a new thing where she just says the word "poop" nonstop. I don't really like it. She also eats her own boogers. I'm not joking. She's gross like that. Also, remember when I said I put waffles in the toaster? Well, I forgot about those and I only ate them just now. Now my sister is just saying random numbers. Now she's saying that they're not random, they're the numbers being displayed on the microwave. Still, I don't know why she's doing that. Now she's making annoying clicking noises. Now she's saying that she's gonna watch Friends on three different devices. Why!?!?! Hi its me their sister. I'd like to say that all of that is not true. [REDACTED] wants to make their own video but i wont let them because i need my phone for my alarm.POOP POOP POOP POOP LOL IM FUNNY. kjnbhhisdnhidfhdfhjsdjksdnjhdfhdfghdfghdfbhdfbcbhnidjsduhchyduhyduhdhcduhduhdcdhcdhjdnjdnhjsdjxnj Hey, I'm back. Sorry about my sister. I had to seize control of the LTE from her because she was doing keymash. Keymash is just effortless. She just went back to school. She comes home from school for her lunch break. I think I'm gonna go again. Bye! Hello, I'm back. Let's compare LTE's. This one is only 8593 characters long so far. Kenneth Iman's LTE is 21425 characters long. The Flaming-Chicken LTE (the original) is a whopping 203941 characters long! I think I'll be able to surpass Kenneth Iman's not long from now. But my goal is to surpass the Flaming-Chicken LTE. Actually, I just figured out that there's an LTE longer than the Flaming-Chicken LTE. It's Hermnerps LTE, which is only slightly longer than the Flaming-Chicken LTE, at 230634 characters. My goal is to surpass THAT. Then I'll be the world record holder, I think. But I'll still be writing this even after I achieve the world record, of course. One time, I printed an entire copy of the Bee Movie script for no reason. I heard someone else say they had three copies of the Bee Movie script in their backpack, and I got inspired. But I only made one copy because I didn't want to waste THAT much paper. I still wasted quite a bit of paper, though. Now I wanna see how this LTE compares to the Bee Movie script. Okay, I checked, and the Bee Movie script is 50753 characters long. Not as long as some of the LTEs I mentioned, but still longer than mine and Kenneth Iman's combined. This LTE is getting close to 10000 characters! That means it'll be half the length of Kenneth Iman's LTE. That's pretty exciting. Also, going back to the topic of the Bee Movie Script, I tried to write the entire thing out by hand once. But I never finished it, especially since I'm focusing on this thing now. Maybe I should write this LTE out by hand. Nah, I don't think I will. Yay, we're at 10000 characters! Let's celebrate by talking about MUSIC! Music is cool. That concludes our celebratory discussion about music. Thank you, and have a good rest of your day. Hi, I'm back now, and I got a book! It's a dictionary for a language called Elefen. It's like Esperanto, but better. Now I can learn Elefen even without internet! That's pretty cool. I will now write something in Elefen. See if you can understand it! Here goes: Si tu pote leje esta, tu es merveliosa! Elefen es un lingua multe fresca! Did you understand that? Maybe you can't speak Elefen, but you still understood that because of your knowledge of other languages. Elefen is cool because it's an actual language, not an English code like Pig Latin or Viesa. Oh, I forgot to mention that my sister is back from school. She's blasting Rhett and Link songs right now. Have you seen that picture of Rhett and Link standing with a bunch of *******? Sorry, I almost said the F word there. That would've broken my rule of not saying the F word. I wrote something in Elefen, so I will also write something in Toki Pona. See if you can understand it now! sina sona e toki mi la sina pona mute a! I can speak Toki Pona fluently, by the way. It's also a pretty cool language. My sister is still playing annoying songs. It's hindering my focus right now. But it's fiiiiine. Okay, luckily she's run out of songs to play. At least for now. She's trying to think of another annoying song to play. Now she's playing a song by Green Day. Not NEARLY as bad as the other songs she just played. I should go for now. Goodbye! Hello, I'm back once again. I don't know why I feel obligated to say that every time I come back. But I'll keep doing it anyway. My sister stopped blasting annoying songs, so that's good. She's cooking something in the microwave. I'll go check to see what it is right now. Nevermind, it's already done cooking. Right, I remember! It's mac and cheese! Now she just started singing "I have a tongue, you don't, because I cut it off yesterday". I don't know what goes on in her mind when she does stuff like that. I've been messing around with my Elefen dictionary for a while, looking up whatever random words I can think of. By the way, the whole reason I'm doing this longest text ever is because of pointlesssites.com. That's how I found the Flaming-Chicken LTE, which inspired me to start writing this LTE. So thanks, pointlesssites.com! I check that website every day to see what new pointless websites they add. You know, I could double every letter I type so that this text would be twice as long as it normally would be. But nah, that's kinda cheating. So I won't. Also, SUBSCRIBE TO PEWDIEPIE! There, I did my part. Not that anyone will read this, but still. 'Twould be nice if you subscribed to PewDiePie. That's another word I invented. Actually, I looked it up, and I didn't invent it. Someone came up with it before I did. That's pretty sad. Also, LEARN VIESA TODAY! IT WILL CURE YOUR DEPRESSION! Seriously though, learn Viesa. It won't actually cure your depression, but I'm desperate for speakers. I only have one other person to speak it with. I should go now. Goodbye. Hi, I’m back. I just came up with an idea: SIMPLIFIED ENGLISH! Or, in Simplified Engish: Simifid Enis. It’s where every group of consonant letters is reduced to the first consonant in that group of consonants, and same goes with the vowels. If a word ends up being just a single consonant with no vowel, put ‘a’ at the end. So “I like eating my waffles” becomes “I like etin ma wafes”. Isn’t it the most amazing thing ever? Nah, it’s not quite as amazing as Viesa. Actually, Viesa isn’t a real language, so it’s less amazing then Elefen and Toki Pona, both of which are cool languages. I kinda figured that half of this text would be about languages. Oh well. I just really want this to be the longest text ever, without using copy and paste, keymash, etc. If you remember, my sister did a little bit of keymash in this text a while ago. I would’ve deleted it, but nah, I didn’t feel like it. And besides, it’s not like it took up half this text. I have an estimate for how long it’ll take me to be the world record holder: about one month. I think I can manage one month of writing this. You know what? I’m just gonna break my rule of not saying the word “furry”. There, I said it. Now I’m allowing myself to write “furry” whenever I want. So with that out of the way, let’s talk about how I first became a furry. For some reason, I have the exact date when I became a furry memorized. It’s May 4, 2018. At that time, I discovered that I was a furry by watching some furry YouTube videos. I knew about the existence of furries years before this, but I didn’t know much about it until this time. I said to myself, “You know what? I’m a furry now,” and that’s what started it all. And I’ve been slowly learning more about the fandom ever since. I would like to participate more in the fandom when I’m older, but I’m too young for most of it right now. Guess I’ll just have to wait. But in the meantime, I can write about it in this text. I should sleep now. Goodnight. Hello, I'm back once again. Happy Pi Day! I memorized a bunch of digits of Pi once, not sure how many I still remember... I have literally nothing to write about now. I've been trying to come up with something for the past 10 minutes, and I still have no idea. Literally nothing is happening right now. It's pretty boring. My sister is watching Friends, as usual. Okay, since there's nothing for me to write about, I should go now. Bye! Wow, it has been a while since I last added to this. It is now July 10, 2019. Last time I edited this page was Pi Day, which was March 14. Those 4 months of this thing being untouched end today! Wait... 4 months? That means I was supposed to get this past the world record three months ago. Oh well. I have put many things into this text. A lot of them were cringy, like how I keep mentioning furry-related things. You know, I should stop putting things in here when I know I'm gonna cringe at them later. I'll try not to do that from here on out. I just know I'll fail though. I'd hate to be aware of someone reading this entire thing... like, if I had to sit and watch a family member or something read this entire text, I would cringe so hard. I would not want that to happen. I am currently pasting the entirety of the FlamingChicken LTE onto a page on OurWorldOfText. The frustrating thing about pasting stuff there is that it pastes one letter at a time, so it takes forever to paste long text. And when the tab isn't open, I'm pretty sure it just stops pasting, so you have to keep the tab open if you want it to continue. Why am I even doing this? No idea. I might not even paste the whole thing. I probably won't. Hey, I just had a thought. What if, in the future, students are reading this for a class assignment? What if this LTE becomes part of the school curriculum? If so, hi future student! I hope you're enjoying reading my CRINGE. What is my life coming to? That's enough writing for now. Goodbye. Hey again. Might as well continue writing in here for a bit. Hey, have you ever heard of 3D Movie Maker? It's a program from the 90s (that still works on modern computers) where you can make 3D animated movies. It's pretty cool. I've made a few movies with it myself, and many other people use it to make interesting stuff. In case you want to try it for yourself, I'm sure if you google "3dmm download" or something like that, it will take you somewhere where you can download the program. It's kinda aimed at younger children, but hopefully that doesn't stop you from making absolute masterpieces with this program. I have a keyboard in my room (the musical kind, not the one you type words on), and I don't really know how to play it properly, but I do it anyways. I can play a few songs on the piano (albeit with weird fingering because like I just said, I have no idea what I'm doing), including HOME - Resonance and PilotRedSun - Bodybuilder. You might not know one or both of those songs. If you don't know one of them, why not google it? You will have discovered some new music, and it will all be because of me. Why are you reading this, anyways? How did you even find it? Were you like me, and you were browsing pointlesssites.com, eventually finding the FlamingChicken LTE and going down a rabbit hole of discovering random LTEs? Literally the only reason I'm writing this right now is because that happened. I just discovered a new LTE: the RainbowFluffySheep LTE. I'm gonna see how many characters long it is. 75,957 characters. Pretty long, but not as long as the top two LTEs (FlamingChicken and Hermnerps, both with around 200,000 characters). I wanna write as much as possible into this text today. I'm gonna see how much LTE-writing I can do in one day. Hopefully it's a lot, because I wanna hold a world record! Imagine having a world record. Well, would it really be a world record? Because I don't know of any world record books that have "Longest Text Ever" as a record. Oh well, I just hope this LTE passes exactly 230,634 characters. That's all my goal is. I'm not even a tenth of the way there yet, but give it a month and I'm sure I'll get there. Hey, remember last time I said it would only take a month? That was four months ago. I should just stop promising things all together at this point. Forget I said anything about that. Did you know my sister has an LTE? That's right! It's not very long, though, and you can't read it because it's on her phone. She made it while bored at the library. That library was where I used to have web design classes. Those were fun, but I don't do them anymore. Now all I do it sit at home and write stuff in here. Well, I'm exaggerating. I go to the convenience store with my sister sometimes. But that's pretty much it outside of being bored on a computer. I should be a less boring human being. One day, I should translate this entire LTE into Viesa. That would be a big waste of time, even bigger than writing the LTE itself. But I could still do it. I don't think I ever will. This text is simply too long, and it'll be even longer than that by the time I pass 230,634 characters. By the way, if you think I'm gonna stop writing this once I pass 230,634 characters, you're wrong! Because I'll keep writing this even after I pass that point. It'll feel nice to be way ahead the record. My sister's alarm clock has been going off for half an hour and I haven't turned it off. Why? Because LAZYNESS! Actually, I really should turn it off now. There, I turned it off. First when I tried to turn it off, it started playing the radio. Then I tried again, and it turned off completely. Then I hurt myself on the door while walking out. So that was quite the adventure. I'm gonna go sleep now. Goodnight! Hey, I'm back again. My computer BSOD'd while writing this, so I have to start this section over again. That's why you save your work, kids! Before I had to start over again, I was talking about languages. Yes, I decided to bring that topic back after a while. But I no longer want to talk about it. Why? Because it'll probably bore you to death. That is assuming you're reading this at all. Who knows, maybe absolutely zero people will read this within the span of the universe's existence. But I doubt that. There's gotta be someone who'll find this text and dedicate their time to reading it, even if it takes thousands of years for that to happen. What will happen to this LTE in a thousand years? Will the entire internet dissapear within that time? In that case, will this text dissapear with it? Or will it, along with the rest of what used to be the internet, be preserved somewhere? I'm thinking out loud right now. Well, not really "out loud" because I'm typing this, and you can't technically be loud through text. THE CLOSEST THING IS TYPING IN ALL CAPS. Imagine if I typed this entire text like that. That would be painful. I decided to actually save my work this time, in case of another crash. I already had my two past attempts at an LTE vanish from existance. I mean, most of this LTE is already stored on Neocities, so I probably won't need to worry about anything. I think I might change the LTE page a little. I want the actual text area to be larger. I'm gonna make it a very basic HTML page with just a header and text. Maybe with some CSS coloring. I don't know. Screw it, I'm gonna do it. There, now the text area is larger. It really does show how small this LTE is so far compared to FlamingChicken or Hermnerps. But at least I made the background a nice Alice Blue. That's the name of the CSS color I used. It's pretty light. We're getting pretty close to the 1/10 mark! That's the point where we're one tenth of the way to making this the longest text ever, meaning all I have to do is write the equivalent of everything I've already written so far nine more times! Not gonna make any promises, though. How come every time I try to type "though", it comes out as "thought"? Why do I always type the extra T? It's so annoying that I have to delete the T every time. Okay, only mildly annoying. Not as annoying as I previously described. I apologize for my exaggeration of the annoyance level of me typing "thought" instead of "though". I just realized that most of the games I play are games that I've been playing for at least six years. I started playing Garry's Mod in 2013, Minecraft in whatever year version 1.2.3 came out. Now I have to look that up. March 2, 2012. So I started playing Minecraft approximately during that time. Wow, seven years ago! Coincidentally, I was also seven years old then. I remember the days of 2012-13. That was when I still played Roblox and made terrible YouTube videos. I was called "Infinite Budgets" back then. I also remember the days of 2016. A lot of people thought that was a terrible year, but for me personally, it brings me a lot of nostalgia because I talked a lot with my online friend at the time, and I did livestreams on YouTube and stuff. It was fun. 2016 was also when I got the phone that I still have to this day. Yup, my phone is three years old. My life was completely different when I got this phone: I was 11 years old, my YouTube channel actually had activity, and I wasn’t writing this text. I’m currently writing this in the car. We are on out way to the dollar store. And since I’m writing this on my phone, I’m making a lot more typos than usual. Some of them might make it through, so be prepared for that. Anyways, we appear to be getting close to the dollar store. I have a gift card for that place. I think so anyways, it might be for a different store... Yup, this dollar store is different. Oh well. My sister has an obsession with sponges. I’m sure she’s gonna find the sponges and go crazy over them. Why does she like sponges so much? No idea. She just found a bag of tiny baby dolls, and she wants to put them in ice cubes and call it “Ice Ice Baby”. She is truly a strange human being. My sister also has an obsession with stuffies. She has such an addiction, that she’s banned from them. Now she found the wigs and she’s considering buying one. She’s been looking at them for quite a while now. We’re out of the dollar store, and now we’re going to the computer store. I have no idea why we’re here. I guess we just are. Now we’re going home. Welp, that was a fun adventure. Stay tuned for more fun adventures as you read through this LTE. I should go now. Bye! Hello again. I made a private world on OurWorldOfText for my sister and I, but she doesn't want to join it. She doesn't think it'll be fun. Now I'm just editing it alone. How sad. But oh well. Now I’m here adding more to this text. I once made a Discord server specifically for a language called “Bo”, where the only word is “bo”. I made it almost four months ago, and somehow, it’s still going. People are still spamming nothing but “bo” there. It’s great. I also once made a server where you’re not allowed to use any vowels. It was a very strange server. I deleted it after some time though, so all that insanity is no more. I also used to own a Pig Latin server, but it got inactive so I deleted that too. We had some good memories in that server though. Now there’s a new Pig Latin server, but it’s not owned by me. Dang, my YouTube channel has been dead for so long. I haven’t posted a video in a year. I want to revive it, but I don’t know what to post there. I’ll figure it out. I doubt my channel will ever go back to it’s 2016 legacy, but I’m sure I’ll post something eventually. Random fact of the day: there are thirty-nine question marks so far in this text. Am I about to make it forty? Yes, I just did. Now the fact I initially stated is no longer true. Or is it? Because I said “so far” in the fact, that implies that we’re talking about the moment that fact was said, disregarding any future events. Now I’m pretty sure that fact is still technically true. Welp, I guess I should just accept that I’m editing that world of text alone for the rest of my life. I originally put a bunch of complaining in there, but I deleted it all. The thing is, now that world will never be same without all of that complaining about my sister not being here. But that’s fine. Hey, I just had a cool realization. Basically, there’s this conlang (constructed language, for those not in the know) server where we have a Sentence of the Week activity. In this activity, someone posts a text with a maximum of nine sentences, then people translate it into their own conlangs. My realization is this: if we take nine sentences from this LTE every week, there would be a whole year of sentences for people to translate. There are approximantly 523 sentences in this LTE. Divide that by 9 sentences each week, and you get 58 weeks worth of sentences, which is approximantly the number of weeks in a year. Quick maths. I actually suck at math, but that’s besides the point. I should go now. Goodbye! Hello, I’m back again. I really need to come up with different hello and goodbye messages, because I’ve already said “Hello, I’m back again” once before. Same with the “I should go now. Goodbye!” I said at the end of the previous section. I was going to explain what a “section” is, but I’m terrible at explaining things, so I’m not going to anymore. I guess you’ll just have to figure it out yourself. It’s probably not very hard to figure out, anyways. I guess I can just say that a section starts with me saying hello, and ends with me saying goodbye. That should be enough explaination, now that I think about it. Hey, do you ever feel like you never have any idea what you’re talking about? That’s my entire life. I just summarized it all in one sentence. On an unrelated note, I feel like half this LTE is just me talking about the LTE itself. I mean, press CTRL+F on this webpage, then type “LTE”. Look at all the times I use it in this text! Not counting the ‘lte’ in the word ‘multe’, of course. Dang, now the search results will include that, too. Anyways, half of this text is just me talking about how I’m trying to get this text to be the longest. Well, the longest LTE, anyways. I still have a long way to go. I’m only 12.7% of the way there. I mean, minus the four month gap, my estimation is that I’ve only been writing this for not even two weeks. So it makes sense that this LTE isn’t very long yet. Whenever I look at this webpage, it looks long at first glance, but the longer I look at it, the more I realize how short it actually is. It’s something that I can’t explain. For real this time. I just realized that none of this is helping the fact that half this LTE is about the LTE itself. I should bring up a new topic, but I don’t feel comfortable talking about much else. Why? Because, like I said, I never have any idea what I’m talking about. Most of this LTE is just me talking about LTEs or languages. Sometimes furries, but I don’t wanna go back into that territory at this point. But it doesn’t matter, because I’m still gonna write this LTE for as long as possible, even if it means talking about the same things half the time. Also, LEARN VIESA! Haven’t said that in a while, so I might as well bring it back. The documentation for Viesa is on this very website, so go ahead and read it! You might need to know some linguistic knowledge to understand it, though. In fact, you probably won’t understand most of it unless you know some amount about lingusitics, so you have been warned. If Viesa is too much for you, Pig Latin will probably be better for you. If it's so easy that kids can learn it, you can too! It's a language you can learn in probably five minutes, so why not give it a try? You may also enjoy Ubbi Dubbi, where you place 'ub' before every vowel sound. It's also a very easy language to learn, although not quite as popular. The thing is, none of these are even real languages. They're just codes, and very simple codes at that. You could probably crask Pig Latin or Ubbi Dubbi rather easily. Viesa too, actually. But I still enjoy them occasionally, even if Pig Latin and Ubbi Dubbi are inefficient and easy to crack, and Viesa is easy to crack yet unneccesarily difficult. I do make real languages, but I never put in the effort to learn them to fluency. At least I make them at all. Here’s a fun game: I will open up a random page from a book, and tell you the first word I see. English. That’s the word. Stay tuned for more fun games as you read through this LTE. We’re back, and we’re gonna play the same game as before. Ready? Subject. Now we’re gonna do it again. Reading. And again. Itself. Constituent. Grammar. Colloquial. Black. Outline. Add. About four of those words were language related. You’ll never guess why! (Spoiler alert: it’s a conlanging book). I’m running out of ideas now. I’m just gonna generate a random word and try to talk about it. Forbid. That’s the opposite of “allow”, I’m pretty sure. I don’t really know what else to say. Well, I guess I failed at generating a topic I could talk about. You know what's weird? My favorite word hasn't been used once in this entire text. I'm about to change that forever. Epic. Yup, my favorite word is "epic". I use it on a regular basis. I say "That's epic" all the time. It's a word I can't live without. Hey, I've now written more of this text after the 4 month gap than before it! Just thought I'd share that fact. Also, I'm gonna try and write as much as possible in this LTE today. I've already written more today than the day I first said I was gonna write as much as possible, so that's a good sign. The thing is, I don't know what to write about. I need to write about something, otherwise I won't write at all and I won't accomplish my goal. Wait, what goal should I set? How many characters should I write today? I'm gonna try and get 10,000 characters. I've already written almost 5,000 today, so from here I just have to write the equivellant of everything I've already written today. I'm just gonna try it and see if I make it. Maybe sometime in the future I'll do a bigger goal, like 15,000 or even 20,000 in one day. Actually, I don't know if 20,000 would even be possible for me. It might be, but it sounds like somewhat of a stretch for me to write that much in a single day. We'll see how long 10,000 takes, though. I'm already doing a bad job at this. I haven't typed anything here in several minutes. I need a topic. Um, Vabungula, I guess? Basically, it's a conlang created by Bill Price in 1965. It amazes me how one can work on a single conlang for that long. Most of the conlangs I start making die after 15 minutes. Anyways, I really like it because... um, I don't know, actually. There's not really anything about it that's super interesting (other than how long it's existed), it's just his personal conlang. Maybe it's the amount of development that went into it. It has over 5,000 dictionary entries and several texts written in the language. I'm sure most people reading this don't care about my language related talk, but I gotta make this long. I'm desperate to reach my 10,000 character goal. I've got 4,000 to go. I just found a website that generates random art from a seed. I just put this entire text as the seed, and it generated something quite nice. I would put the picture here, but I want this LTE to be nothing but text, so I won't do that. I've been playing with this for a while now. Many of the seeds produce boring pictures, but some of them are nice. For example, I just used "e" as the seed and it produced a nice looking picture. "a" looks nice too, arguably nicer. I've been using nothing but the word "nice" to describe these pictures. Maybe it's time to get a bigger vocabulary? "b" looks, um, good? I don't have the right vocabulary for this. I also don't feel like doing every single letter, because the pictures take some time to generate. But if you want to do it for yourself, just go to random-art.org and try it out! By the way, this is another website I found through pointlesssites.com. You know, the same website that lead me to the FlamingChicken LTE, which lead me to begin writing this whole thing. But what made me discover pointlesssites.com? Vsauce mentioned it. But what made me discover Vsauce? YouTube Reccomendations, probably. But what made me discover YouTube? As far as I remember, my dad showed it to me when I was 6. So I would like to thank my dad for being the reason I started writing this. He's the one who showed me YouTube, which reccomended me Vsauce, which mentioned pointlesssites.com, which brought me to the FlamingChicken LTE, which inspired me to start my own LTE. If he had never shown me YouTube, I wouldn't be here writing this text, and you wouldn't be reading it. Well, that's probably not true, because I probably would have discovered YouTube by other means, thus leading me to Vsauce, leading me to Vsauce, leading me to pointlesssites.com, leading me to the FlamingChicken LTE, leading me to... okay, I really need to stop now. I've gone too far. But you know what I haven't gone too far with? This LTE. I don't think I even can go too far with writing this text. Unless this text gets so long that it surpasses the 1GB storage limit of Neocities. In which case, I'll need to upgrade to Supporter in order to get a 50GB storage limit. But what if the text gets so long that is surpasses that? I don't think I'll ever make it there. I mean, 50GB is about 50 trillion characters. So I think we're good. I still need to get to 10,000 by the end of today. I've got 1,500 to go. Currently watching a livestream. It's reminding me of when I used to livestream back in 2016. I still kinda miss those days. But at the same time, I was quite awkward and had zero social skills, so I'm not sure if I'd want to go back. At this point, everything I've written today is longer than what can fit on the screen at once. At least on my computer screen. It probably changes with different screen resolutions and devices. But anyways, it's pretty unusual for that much of the LTE to be written in a single day. I don't want to pressure myself into writing this much every day, though. Last time I forced myself to complete a certain amount of something every day, it was overwhelming and I ended up losing motivation, thus letting down all my fans who were anticipating the August 30th, 2016 release date. Okay, the amount of eager fans was probably a number you could count on one hand, but still. By the way, if you're wondering what this "something" was, it was GoAnimated Garbage: The Movie, which was supposed to be an hour long episode of a series I made to make fun of random GoAnimate videos. In case you're not the type of person who knows what GoAnimate is... hoo boy. Basically, it's a drag-and-drop animation website infamous for the "grounded videos" that people made with it, among other types of videos. It's this whole community that I neither can explain nor want to explain. But I had somewhat of an association with that community back in the day. On my YouTube channel, I used to make a genre of GoAnimate video known as the "OS video". Typically an OS video is where some sort of hated character within the GoAnimate community forcefully installs their operating system onto a user's computer, and the user has to deal with this OS until they eventually find a way to "destroy" it. I made five of these videos. In chronological order: Caillou OS, Boots OS, Franklin OS, Little Bill OS, and Crap OS X. Caillou OS is the most viewed video on my main channel, which is unsurprising since Caillou is pretty much THE character associated with the GoAnimate community. When I made that video, it was a big transition for my channel. The channel's name was changed from Infinite Budgets, which had been my name since 2013 when I made crappy Roblox videos, to Allisima. All of my old videos were deleted, with the exception of my "Barney Errors", which was yet another genre of GoAnimate video. Basically, a Barney error is when a user's computer/console/whatever session is interrupted by a "Barney Error", a message informing the user that Barney has been killed, and the device must not be turned off because it's an "important message". There's also a bomb that's placed in Barney's "lair", the timer for which is displayed in the error. The user gets some amount of "chances", and every time the device is turned off, the user looses a chance and the time until the bomb explodes decreases. Eventually, the user turns off the computer enough times that there are no more chances left, the bomb explodes, and some sort of punishment happens. These punishments can range from having to downgrade your operating system, to having your computer destroyed, and in extreme cases, even to death. I once made a whole channel for Barney Errors, where I made about twenty of them before quitting. After that, I eventually quit GoAnimate all together, but I still made Crap OS X, an OS video made with Powerpoint. I also made an interactive OS parody called Windows Poop Editon, again with Powerpoint. Before that, I also made one called "Atch OS" using my old Windows XP netbook. I just checked to see if my old Weebly website still exists, since there's an Atch OS download on there and I wanted to see if it dissapeared from existence or not. Appearantly it does! I'm getting so much nostalgia from this website. It's like a window into 2016, when I had fun making these videos on a regular basis. I'm way past my 10,000 character goal now. I'm kinda glad I set this goal, but again, I'm not gonna force myself to do it everyday. I think I'm gonna stop writing for today. Bye! Hey, I'm back. Yes, that hello wasn't original either, since I already said it once. Specifically, after my sister seized the LTE and started spamming. You remember that, right? I hope you read through this whole thing instead of just picking a random part (which just happened to be this part) and reading only a tiny bit. Nah, I'm just kidding. Read this text however you want to, it doesn't matter if you read this entire text from start to finish or not. I mean, I did put some cringy stuff in here, as I keep mentioning. But it's on the Internet, and since recently, on my homepage, so I know people are gonna read it. Really the only reason I'm making this is because I have a weird obsession for writing giant walls of text. Guess what? I just added translations of this LTE into various conlangs on my website! But they're all very incomplete, and I probably won't finish them ever... I mean, if I'm gonna finish any of them, 'twill probably be the Viesa translation since it's the easiest to do. Hey, 'twill's back! I remember the very beginnings of this LTE, when I first mentioned 'twill. That was 40,000 characters ago. Appearantly I'm measuring time with characters now. Hey, what's the average amount of text I write per day in this LTE? The four month gap probably significantly drops that amount. Let's see! The trouble is finding out when I started writing this LTE, because I don't know the exact date. I'm just gonna estimate that it was March 12, based on the amount of times I said goodnight before I said "Happy Pi Day". It's not a very accurate measurement, though, because sometimes I stop writing for the day without saying goodnight. But anyways, from March 12 to today, July 16, is 127 days. As of that previous sentence, there are 42,549 characters in this LTE. 42,549 characters divided by 127 days equals about 335 characters per day. That's not very much at all. To get an idea of how short that is, the first 335 characters of this LTE consist of about 64 words and 8 sentences. As I predicted, the four months of no activity had a big impact on this number. But what if we ignore the 4 month gap, which was from March 15 to July 9, I've only been working on this LTE for ten days. 42,549 characters divided by 10 days is about 4254 characters. That's much better. It might be that big because of the 12,600 characters I wrote yesterday. I said I wouldn't do it every day, but honestly, I'm feeling like doing a goal again today. I think I might even go a bit higher than yesterday. Let's do 15,000 characters! I have zero life outside of this LTE, anyways, so I think I'll make it. As long as I keep typing about random stuff for the entire day, I'll probably get past 15,000 easily. I think I'm insane. Literally all I do anymore is write this LTE. My mom is almost certainly concered for me, because I was in my room pretty much all of yesterday and my sister told her about how I'm trying to write the longest text ever. But enough about my descent into insanity for now. Let's get this LTE to over 55,000 characters today! This is probably the most meta LTE in existence. Like I've said, I talk about the LTE itself as much, if not more than anything else. By the way, if I were to write as much as I did yesterday every day, I would reach my goal in just 15 days. Now I'm tempted to do that, even though I said I wouldn't set a goal like that every day. I think I might end up doing it subconciously. I kinda wanna convince some other people I know online to start their own LTE. Wouldn't it be fun if we all had our own LTEs? They would probably all die within a day, but at least I wouldn't be the only one writing an LTE in 2019... The most recently updated LTE I've seen is the RainbowFluffySheep LTE, which I believe was last updated in late 2018. That wasn't really that long ago, but still, I don't think it's being updated anymore. Now let's do an LTE Timeline! The original FlamingChickens LTE was probably started sometime in 2004, and Hermnerps was started the same year. The FlamingChickens LTE stopped in 2005, while the Hermnerps LTE actually lived on until 2009, although edits after the end of 2004 were rather sparce. The Kenneth Iman LTE was started in 2013 and was last updated in 2015. The RainbowFluffySheep LTE both started and was last updated in March 2018. And of course, the WhileTrue LTE was started in March 2019 and is still being updated today. Wow, 15 years of LTEs! I think my LTE is the only one still being updated. It would be nice if someone else was writing their own LTE along with me. But 'twill be hard to convince other people to waste their lives writing a useless wall of text. You never know, maybe an LTE that stopped being edited years ago will come back from the dead. That seems kind of unlikely though. Very strange fact incoming. A certain word has not been used since the very beginning of this text. Ready to learn what it is? I shouldn't tell you, actually. Of course, that would ruin it. Unless you want me to ruin a really cool fact. Surely you wouldn't want that to happen. Okay, I'll just tell you, because I'm probably gonna end up using it again someday or another. The word is "various". If you search for "various" in this LTE, you'll only find it at the very beginning as well as here. And I was gonna keep this a secret, but just now I did this thing where if you take the first letter of each sentence, it spells out "VARIOUS". Kinda clever... I guess? Anyways, for those who are insane enough to be reading this entire thing from the start: Wow, you have quite the dedication. My LTE isn't even the longest yet, but perhaps in the future, when it is the longest, people will be challenging themselves to read the entire thing. And maybe you're one of them! Perhaps you're reading this long after I've passed my goal, in which case you still have quite a bit to go. So I wish you luck on your Longest Text Ever reading adventure! I've been talking about LTEs all day. For the past 6,000 characters, in fact. I need to find something different to talk about. But first, I just had an idea pertaining LTEs. I should compare this LTE to the longest joke in the world! The longest joke in the world is 56,554 characters long, which is about how long I'm trying to get this LTE by the end of today. So if I reach my goal today, this text will be longer than the longest joke in the world! That's pretty cool. I would also be a quarter of the way to my goal. But let's get back to finding something different to talk about. I can't think of anything. My sister is singing a song about wanting Subway. I will never understand her. What goes through her brain that makes her decide "Yeah, I think it would be a good idea to sing about how I really want Subway"? I don't get how her brain works. She also likes eating paper. I asked her and appearantly she was perfectly okay with me writing that in here. She probably thinks nobody's ever gonna read this. But she's gonna be wrong! Eventually. Now she's asking me to write about how she likes yogurt. "Because I didn't used to", she says. She's eating mango yogurt, and she has water in a Gatorade bottle. Now I'm asking her what else I should put in this text. She says I should write about how there's wild sage where we live. Now she's having hot chocolate. She didn't ask me to write that, but I told her I was going to write it and she said okay. My sister might start her own Longest Text Ever, again. She says it will have only one word repeated throughout the entire text. But I told her that it defeats the purpose of an LTE. In the original FlamingChickens LTE, one of the very first things that is written is "I will just type, and type, and never, ever use copy and paste". Okay, I just made a webpage for her LTE (it's gonna be an actual LTE this time). Stay tuned for "The Best Longest Text Ever", as she calls it. I think it should have just been called "KKs Longest Text Ever" or something, but whatever. She types really slow, but I hope her LTE will be successful nonetheless. Warning: if you do go and read her LTE, she spoils Spiderman: Far From Home at the very beginning, so be careful about that. In fact, she's basically typing the entire plot of the movie. Well, that's one way to increase your LTE's length, I guess. My sister is listening to her terrible songs instead of writing her LTE. Well, she has her LTE page open, but she's not writing anything and is singing instead. Actually, she's writing stuff now, so ignore everything I said previously. She's still writing the entire plot. Her LTE is now 2,000 characters, which isn't very long, but she's only been working on it for an hour. Plus she's a slow typer. She types everything with one hand. It might take a while for her LTE to get to this level. But assuming she keeps writing it and doesn't forget about it after today, it'll get pretty long eventually. I still need to write 7,000 characters today. My sister is watching a cringy video made by our old elementary school. They became a French immersion school after I left. She found one of the videos I was in... oh god, I can't stand to look at that video. It hurts me to think about those days. My sister's LTE webpage has text now! Maybe I should create a page linking to all the LTEs I know about. I think I'll do that. Boom, it is done. I think I'm gonna also put a link to it on this page. There, that's done as well. Guys, I'm not sure if I'm gonna make it to 15,000. I still have 5,000 characters to go (I was completely off earlier, I don't have 7,000 left to go), and there's not much left of the day. In retrospect, it was probably a bad idea to make a goal for the day in the first place. After all, LTE writing is supposed to be fun! Sort of. There's zero need to make unneccesary deadlines. I think it just reduces the fun, as well as the part of my life that isn't just writing huge walls of text. From here on out, I declare character-per-day goals abolished. I will no longer make attempts to write a certain amount in a single day. I should have listened to my past self, who said not to do goals every day. But I didn't, and now I regret it. But anyways, here's a fun fact about this LTE: excluding my upcoming usage, the pronoun "he" is only used twice in this LTE, and they both refer to my dad. On the other hand, the pronoun "she" is used forty times! Almost all of these refer to my sister. Only one refers to my mom. I guess I just really like talking about the weird stuff my sister does. But not as much as being meta and talking about my own LTE. Here's another fun fact: "LTE" is the fourteenth most common word in this text! That's insane. It's more common than words you'd expect to be common, like "you", "I'm", "for", "be", "about", "was", and so on. I really need to talk about other things once in a while. But since I have zero creativity, I always resort to talking about the same topics. From what I've seen, most other LTEs are pretty diverse, but mine isn't at all. Honestly, this is likely the most boring LTE to read. But my absolute lack of creativity means it's probably gonna stay that way for a long time. I'm tired, so I'm gonna go to sleep. Maybe I'll be more creative by tomorrow. Probably not. Anyways, goodnight. Hey, I'm back, and I don't feel any more creative. But I did have a dream last night, so I'm gonna talk about that. Last night, I dreamt that I was in one of our old houses, and I saw that someone made a video roasting Viesa. They talked about how you shouldn't say "dog" in Viesa, because appearantly "deeg" is bad or something? I don't know. Then they said the rule where W becomes V is weird, but I don't remember the reason they said it. I didn't really care about how they roasted my language. Then I watched a Minecraft video for whatever reason, and then the dream ended. How do other LTE writers have so many topics to talk about? All I ever talk about is either LTEs themselves, or the fact that all I ever talk about is LTEs. There's no diversity. I very rarely talk about anything else. And when I do, it's usually about languages and lasts only a few sentences. There, I deleted it. Oh, you don't have any context. Basically I wrote a bunch of depressing stuff, then I decided to delete it all. I knew I was going to regret it later, in the same way I regret writing all that stuff about furries. Not that I think there's anything wrong with being a furry, it's just that it personally makes me uncomfortable looking back on it. I'm not even into that stuff as much anymore. I don't watch furry YouTube, and I don't talk about how much I want a fursuit/go to a convention. That's a part of me that's slowly disappearing. Okay, I'm gonna stop talking about that, because I literally just said how I regret talking about it in this text. You know, I've been feeling kind of down about this LTE lately, because as I just mentioned, all I ever talk about is this LTE itself, there's no diversity, blah blah blah. It's especially been like that ever since the four month gap. In fact, I barely talked about LTEs before that gap. It's like I lost all my creativity after four months. You know what? I'm officially gonna say this: If, for some reason, you are reading this before you decide you want to start reading this entire text, READ EVERYTHING FROM "WOW, IT HAS BEEN A WHILE" TO HERE AT YOUR OWN RISK, BECAUSE YOU WILL LIKELY DIE OF BOREDOM DUE TO THE MONOTONOUS TOPICS! There, now I'm gonna try and forget that half this LTE is the same exact boring topic. I will also try to avoid writing about the same exact boring topic for the rest of this text. Let's celebrate the End of Monotonous Topics (EMT) by talking about how we (my sister and I) had lunch and did various other things with our grandpa! So grandpa asked if we wanted to have lunch and spend an afternoon with him, and we said yes. Then he picked us up, and we went to a nearby town where we had lunch, went to a museum which was a house built in 1909 as well as the town's first hospital, and got ice cream from what is appearently one of the best ice cream places in the country, according to grandpa. So today was a fun day. I'm gonna go now. Bye! Hey, I'm back. That's the fifth time I've said that. I need to come up with more original... nah, whatever. Anyways, I had a dream last night which was basically a whole movie I don't remember most of. All I remember is playing a keyboard at the store for some reason, and that the dream ended with a random car horn. Oh, and there was Minecraft involved in the beginning, which I'm pretty sure is becoming a recurring theme in my dreams. I don't know why that happened, because I rarely play Minecraft anymore. Do any of y'all remember the DVD screensaver meme? That was one of my favorite memes. For those who don't know what I'm talking about, many DVD players had this screensaver where it was a DVD logo bouncing around the screen. The big moment that everyone anticipates is when the logo hits the corner of the screen perfectly, because, well, it's just so SATISFYING! I used to watch a livestream that was literally just this screensaver running endlessly. And when it hit the corner, it was a huge celebration for both me and everyone else watching. I got so excited when the logo hit the corner. My computer's screensaver is even still a DVD screensaver. But nowadays when I see it hit the corner, I don't have as much enthusiasm as I used to. I've just seen it too many times for it to be exciting anymore. Plus, the meme isn't even a thing anymore. I doubt that livestream is even still running. But you never know, so I'm gonna check to see if it's still going. Oh wow, it is! That was the last thing I expected to see in July 2019. But only four people are watching it, which makes sense. The title now says "DVD Logo Screensaver For 1 Year", even though it hasn't quite been going on for a year. But when it hits that point, perhaps that's when it will finally end? It should have ended months ago, if you ask me. Yup, I was right. There's a countdown on the livestream to when it ends, and it says 181 days, 9 hours, 12 minutes, and 3 seconds. Wow, the corner hit and wall hit numbers are much bigger now. The most corner hits I'd seen is around 1400 or so, but now it's at 4776! The wall hits used to be in the hundred-thousands, now it's at over two and a half million! Hello, I have returned. There, I came up with something original to say! Anyways, I just combined every single LTE I know of (including this one) and put it onto one single page on a Wikia wiki called "No Rules Wiki". That wiki exactly as you would expect from the title. I found it a while ago, and I thought it was about time I made a contribution, even if pasting over half a million characters into a single article is breaking some rule... I've been wanting to make Viesa an actual conlang for so long now. I think it's long overdue at this point. Hey, I'm back again. These sections are getting shorter and shorter each day. But oh well. I just discovered how much I like the word "number". I don't know why, but it's just so fun to say! I think I've liked that word ever since I was a toddler learning my numbers! I remember thinking it was a fun word even back then. At that time I had two little electronic toys: one was orange and for numbers, and one was purple and for letters. I'm pretty sure those were the colors. I also vaguely remember having a fan that lit up and displayed custom messages. I haven't seen anything like that since then. All I hear right now is Baby Shark being blasted upstairs. You know that song, right? I don't know who doesn't know it at this point. I can't think of a single person I've seen that doesn't know what that song is. Dang, ever since the EMT I haven't been writing as much in this text. Looks like LTEs were all I could talk about. Oh well. How many times have I said "oh well"? Probably a lot. About eight times, in fact. I'm back again. I went a full day without writing anything into this LTE yesterday! There were a lot of things happening that day, so I didn't feel like writing. I could've written at least a little bit, but I didn't. Time for me to use this LTE as my dream journal yet again! I had a dream where my domain was "exin" (or something like that) instead of "whiletrue", so that was a thing. I also had a dream where there was this game that I thought existed in the real world, but it didn't. Dreams do that sometimes. I don't remember much about the game, but it involved the Simpsons, I guess? Also, I was in a weird store where they had an... iCarly laptop? And a bunch of gift cards. That's all I remember. For now, at least. My sister does not like synthwave. She says "it's repetitive", "the sounds they use don't sound like music", and she doesn't like how it doesn't have lyrics. First of all, she's hypocritical because she always listens to the same songs on repeat. And why does it matter that it doesn't have words? Why does she think every single piece of music in existence has to have words? YOU BETTER WATCH YOUR OPINIONS THERE! (That was a reference to a cringy GoAnimator that no one reading this will get, unless you came to this website from my YouTube channel which you subscribed to during my OS video days). Anyways, synthwave is objectively the best genre of music. I remember hearing HOME - Resonance for the first time in a Discord voice chat, and it was magical. I wish I could listen to that song for the first time again. That was how I got into synthwave. You know what my favorite color combination is? Yellow text on a magenta background. Oh, and don't forget the Comic Sans. That is just pure beauty right there. In fact, it's used in the first frame (well, close enough) of "history of the entire world, i guess", which makes me love that video even more. We're at 60,000 characters, 1,000 sentences, and 12,000 words! Weird how all those counts hit such round numbers in one day, huh? I need to stick to the EMT, so I should stop talking about that. My sister is attempting to build a Lego city. Her goal is to have three buildings, since she doesn't have THAT much Lego. Have you noticed how quickly I've been switching topics in this text? That's because I can't talk about anything for a long time. That is, unless that thing is languages or LTEs. I am currently trying to revive a language my sister and I started making a while back. Sometimes my sister has days when she doesn't hate languages for some reason, then she ends up starting one. But of course, she regained her hate and abandoned it. Now I'm the only one working on the language. By the way, the language is called Lazay, which was the successor to Zula, the first language we made together which is now deleted. We started writing the language on paper, but then I started a Google Doc. I'm sure the papers are still here somewhere. I'm just too lazy to find them. I’m back again. I haven’t been ending these sections with goodbyes recently. But whatever. We’re on our way to IKEA to get a dresser for my room. We’re listening to Queens of the Stone Age right now, and I’m just waiting for “Fortress” to come on. I sing that song in Viesa, but I make up half of the lyrics. It goes: Ванавар јак фиртрас кува, ма башег ђара, ја сок. Try and translate that! The song is playing now. I like this song. We’re back from IKEA now. Actually, we’ve been home for hours now, and we’ve already built the dresser. My computer crashed (but don’t worry, I started writing this in Google Docs on my phone), and now Google Chrome won’t open. So I have to use Microsoft Edge for now. I’m gonna sleep now. Goodnight! Hello, I'm back. My sister is brushing my back with a hairbrush, and I don't know why. I asked her what I should write about (because I have zero creativity), and she said I should write about that. I'm gonna type whatever comes to my head now. Hi, I'm a boring human being who has zero creativity whatsoever and still happens to be writing an LTE. Isn't that insane? How could this be? Nobody knows, and nobody will ever know. It is a strange mystery that has yet to be solved. Hmm, I wonder if I should go and eat pancakes now? I'm so random right now. In fact, there's an entire subreddit for that: r/iamsorandom. You should check it out! I mean, you don't really have to, but it would be nice if you did. I use Reddit a lot, but I only use it for language-related stuff. Well, I make posts in language-related subreddits, but the non-language subs that I look at are ones that I don't post anything to, because I know nothing about literally anything that isn't languages. And heck, I don't even know much about languages! I only make English codes and call them "conlangs". Sort of. I usually don't actually call them conlangs, but I use them for such purposes. I speak Viesa as if it were a real language, but it simply is not. Why did I make Viesa in the first place? Well, you see, it all started out as a joke for April Fools' Day. I called it "the new universal language", despite it literally being a cipher of English. What!? A cipher of English being a universal language? How silly! What a funny joke, right? Maybe? Somewhat? Anyways, I then made a SECOND VERSION! DUN DUN DUN! This second version had CLICKY SOUNDS which, spoiler alert, dissapear in the next version of Viesa. Sad, right? RIP CLICKS 2018-2018 NEVER FORGET! I also added WACKY GRAMMAR STUFF and PRONOUNS! WOAH! How crazy! Then I made the next version: VERSION 3.0! This version added CYRILLIC! (you know, that alphabet the Russians use, as well as the Serbs, whose version of the Cyrillic alphabet I stole for Viesa. Hehehe!) And that's the entire history of Viesa, explained in a Zany way! Do you like how I capitalized "Zany" there? Aren't capital letters so cool? They let you YELL AND SCREAM AT THE TOP OF YOUR LUNGS! They add EXCITEMENT! And most of all, they let you capitalize words like This. lowercase letters are also cool. without them, we'd all be yelling and screaming all the time. That would be pretty tiring, wouldn't it? I see two water bottles. One is empty, while the other still has some water in it. The empty one is blue, and the one with the water is pink. I should also mention that the blue one is mine, while the pink one is my sister's. I got that water bottle because I lost my other one at school. But GUESS WHAT? I FOUND IT IN THE LOST AND FOUND! Wow! Now I had two water bottles. How Wacky and Crazy and Zany and Bizzare and all those adjectives that perfectly describe this epic moment! Wow, writing your mind is a great way to increase your LTEs length! Before I was actually THINKING about what I was writing. But now I barely do, and it's greatly improving my LTE! Except the overuse of capital letters might throw the reader off guard a little because of how sparingly I've used them in the past, but oh well. I could fix it, but I don't feel like it. I want to continue writing, but I need to sleep now. Goodnight! Hi, I'm back again. My computer crashed AGAIN, and I was ignorant enough to not save my work, so that means I have to start this part of the text all over again. That's quite unfortunate. But did I mention that my Google Chrome is working again? That's the good news. It's good news because Google Chrome has all my logins, websites, and stuff like that. Hopefully you know what I mean when I say that. Maybe you do, maybe you don't. I don't even know what I mean right now! I'm probably insane right now. Especially since I'm writing this right now, as I have been for about 18 days minus the four month gap... I think. I hope I did that right. As I've said before, I'm bad at math. My sister just read the entirety of what I've written today for some reason. My sister just sang "I want your computer to crash again because I'm evil". She IS evil if she wants my computer to crash. At least I'll have this section saved. In fact, right now I'm pressing Ctrl+S after every sentence! Including this one. And this one. Also this one. I think you get the point now. My sister keeps typing into this LTE without my consent, and I keep having to delete it all. It's pretty annoying. Hey, flashback to when I said that way at the beginning of this text! You know, the part where I talk about the Teen Titans Go episode called "Waffles" where the word "Waffles" is said a hundred-something times. You know what else is said a hundred something times (in this LTE)? The letter J. So far it's been used 115 times in this LTE. That's your Interesting LTE Fact of the Day! Well, not really "daily", but whatever. Here's a story: Once upon a time, people got tired of starting off their stories with "Once upon a time", so they stopped doing that. But one person decided not to stop using "Once upon a time", and used it at the beginning of this story. And that person is ME! The end. Wasn't that a lovely story? You're probably not thinking that. Again, I'm not creative in any way whatsoever. That's why I don't usually write stories and instead write giant walls of text full of meaningless information, like the one and only WhileTrue's Longest Text Ever that you're reading right now. Hopefully nobody died of boredom from reading between "Wow, it has been a while" and the EMT. That's the most boring part of the LTE! 90% of it is just me talking about LTEs themselves. How uninteresting is that? Very uninteresting. Penguins. What are they? I don't know. What am I even writing right now? I haven't a clue. Isn't it weird that I said "haven't a clue" like that? Normally "haven't" isn't used if it's alone as a verb, as in "I haven't my keys". Who says that? Nobody, that's who. And yet "I haven't a clue" is an actual thing I've heard people say. Anyways, AFRICA! That was random, but let's discuss it anyway. Africa is a well-known song by Toto. It's a good song. I can kinda sorta play it on piano? Maybe? I don't know. Another song I can play on the piano is All Star by Smash Mouth. You know, the Shrek song? Anyways, I once made a video called "All Star but it's played on a Sesame Street piano" and it got almost a million views. It's been stuck at 900,000 for what seems like forever now. I'm gonna check to see if it's at a million now. I doubt it, though. Nope, still at 926,000 views. And I doubt it's gonna get any more, to be honest. It had a good run though. My sister is chugging applesauce. She thinks she's epic because of it. I don't know anymore. I seem to keep saying that after everything I type at this point. It's strange. Hello, I have returned after yet another long absence. When was the last time I added to this? I think it was somewhere in July. So yeah, it’s been three months, as it is now October 17, 2019. The end of the decade is approaching fast. I’m a bit excited, because I’ll have significant memories from more than just one decade! My earliest significant memories started in Kindergarden, which was in 2010. This means that I only really remember one decade. But now that an entirely new decade is coming up, I’ll be able to remember another! Part of me feels like I shouldn’t be excited over this, since the boundaries between years is arbitrary, and a decade is 10 years only because we count in base 10, so if we counted in base 12 or something, a decade would be 12 years long. That was kind of a run-on sentence, but I don’t really feel like making this text perfect, anyway. Have you heard of the Library of Babel? libraryofbabel.info is a website containing every possible combination of the lowercase letters a-z, space, comma, and period. The library is divided into hexagonal chambers. Each hex contains four walls. Each wall contains three shelves. Each shelf contains 32 volumes. Each volume contains 410 pages of 3200 characters each. Everything you could ever say or write is on this website. Even this LTE! See for yourself: https://libraryofbabel.info/bookmark.cgi?lte. Okay, that’s only the first bit of it, but every other bit of this LTE is somewhere in the library! In fact, here’s the next bit: https://libraryofbabel.info/bookmark.cgi?lte:1. It’s split up into about 20 different pages. I don’t feel like putting links to all of them here. It also removes punctuation that the library doesn’t use, like the exclamation point, question mark, colon, and so on. But it’s pretty mind-blowing stuff, if you ask me. If you try and browse the library yourself though, you probably won’t find much more than total gibberish. It’s crazy to think that everything we could ever possibly say or write is massively outweighed by meaningless strings of letters and punctuation. HELLO HELLO HELLO HELLO HELLO HELLO HELLO HELLO HELLO HELLO. I said "hello" ten times in all caps in an attempt to make the separation between this writing and the rest of the LTE as clear as possible. Because today is March 5, 2024. The last time I wrote in here was around late 2019, so that's a gap of over 4 and a half years. You know, that doesn't even feel like *that* long of a time to me; perhaps when I was younger, 4 years ago seemed like ancient history in my mind, but as I get older it seems the length of a year becomes less and less significant as all the years start to blur together in my brain. But then once I start to think about it, it becomes undeniable that 4 years is more than enough time to make a huge difference. Since I last edited this LTE, an entire worldwide pandemic came and went, and I've changed and grown so much as a person that it's extremely difficult to look back at the stuff I wrote in this LTE all those years ago without thinking to myself "wait, I used to be like that???". Another thing that happened in the last 4.5 years was that this LTE suddenly exploded in popularity after it was inadvertently put into the background of a few seconds of a Jaiden Animations video. Because as it turns out, Google's magical SEO systems decided that this webpage should be one of the first results to show up when someone searches terms such as "longest text ever", "really long text" etc, which is how this text ended up in that video. I mean, maybe it wasn't strictly Jaiden's video that boosted its popularity; it could just be a bunch of people randomly googling "longest text ever" and coming across my page... which, I wouldn't have ever expected "longest text ever" to be something people were going to search *that* often, but I guess it must be??? Because at the time when it happened, I just figured it'd just be a neat little thing that happened to me once; a little bit of fame that would quickly die out within less than a week. But no, even almost 4 years later I *still* get comments on my YouTube channel about this LTE; I still get people saying things such as "Hey it's the person behind the LTE", "Hey I read your LTE", and so on... People still keep visiting this webpage to this day, and there are many ways that I can tell. If you've wondered what the weird little advertisement thingy at the top of this page is, it's a project run by a close friend of mine called "johnvertisement" which is sort of a parody of web advertisements. If you click on the "john" link you'll find its webpage, and on it is a leaderboard tracking how many johnverts have been served to visitors of each website, on which this very website is at the top by an insanely huge margin. And it's a number that somehow only keeps getting bigger and bigger. So okay, maybe a few people messaging me every once in a while isn't the absolute epitome of internet fame, but more people have wrote to me about this one LTE than people have wrote to me about any of my other projects (although, those old GoAnimate videos I made are arguably much more popular than my LTE). But I think the main reason the everlasting popularity of the WTLTE sticks out in my mind so much is because, well... I kind of hate it. I generally really appreciate it when people pay attention to the things I make, but also it pains me that one of the most prolific projects I have ever created also happens to be a project that I physically cannot think back on with any positive sentiment. When I hear someone tell me that they read the entirely of my LTE, it *should* feel so nice and rewarding to me that someone paid such substantial attention to something that I created; and if it were any other project of mine, I think it would. But instead, all I can think upon hearing something like that is "oh god, I can't imagine how painful it must have been to read through some of the stuff I put in there!!!". Because, well, I don't want to imply that I'm a proponent of cringe culture, because I absolutely am not... but there's so much in here that I can't stop myself from genuinely physically cringing at. Now, it's very easy to cringe at your past self; it's a feeling that so, so many people experience. And whenever I do, I tend to stop and try to think: "What rational reasoning to I have for cringing at myself? Is there a tangible and effable cause for the feelings of discomfort that I am experiencing?". And then I find it difficult to come up with any. I tend to think about my past self from a few years ago as really annoying and cringy, but then my friends tell me they never once saw me that way, which leads me to believe that, as is so often the case for me now, these feelings are nothing but irrational anxieties that don't make sense. So, maybe I don't have any reason to cringe at this LTE, but I still often can't help myself from doing so. Now I knew I was a very different person in 2019, but reading parts of this text, holy crap I didn't realize I was *that* different... If you've already read through this whole LTE and think you have a decent idea about the kind of person that I am because of it, you are completely and utterly wrong. 4 years can do a lot to change a person, especially a person who's still relatively young (I was 15 last time I wrote in here, now I'm 19). 4 years ago I had friends that I still have to this day, and I kind of shudder thinking about that, because I was just so different back then!!! Honestly this LTE, aside from making me cringe uncontrollably, was never really that good in my opinion. There was far too much meta-talk about the LTE itself, and also far too much complaining about how much meta-talk there was... If I started writing another "longest text ever" today (and I've vaguely considered it before...) I'd try to write about things that are actually remotely interesting, and also maybe it'd have a bit more line breaks in it, or maybe it could have much more formatting and images instead of just being plain text (longest webpage ever???). Or at the very least I'd put it on a webpage designed such that the content occupies a thinner space, like how the rest of my site is, because my aforementioned friend has since bestowed upon me the knowledge of the optimality of `width: 80ch;`. By the way, go look at my newer website (viba.neocities.org), it's *way* better than this old website, both in looks and in content. Anyway, the whole reason I'm writing this is to be a (probably) final retrospective on the LTE, and to sort of update some of the people who have read the entire thing. I expected myself to write a bunch of words that actually feel like they're going somewhere, but that just isn't happening at all. I don't know where I'm going with this. My brain is broken and I can't write anything good. I was going to just leave this LTE in the past and forget about it forever, but suddenly I felt the need to remenisce on it just one last time. WhileTrue's Longest Text Ever is something that I'm not the most proud of at all, but it's apparently something I'm still known for. And maybe, just *maybe*, there shouldn't be any shame in that. But it's sort of like a partial autobiography of a person who no longer exists, but whom people may be lead to believe still exists; that person being my past self from 4 years ago. I am not that person, and I hope I can make that clear. I've had many an urge to take this page down, and in fact I did succumb to it once, but then for some reason I felt so much regret for doing that. And besides, once any piece of data on the internet becomes popular enough, it becomes impossible to erradicate it, because it has already duplicated itself countless times like a virus, thanks to being endlessly reposted and downloaded and archived. But as much as this LTE elicits such negative reactions inside my own head, it's clearly elicited positive reactions in the minds of so many others, based on all the kind words people have said to me about it. And I don't want to be the person who deletes all their stuff that other people enjoy so much just because they hate it themselves. So that's the main reason this page is still up. I don't really know how I'm supposed to end this, but all I can say is: Thanks for all the support, and thanks for your sustained interest in the things I have made."
  • a sample in Soul, Funk, Rap
  • "Here's the entire script for the movie Martin Scorsese's Casino
    [Man Narrating]

    When you love someone,

    you've gotta trust them.



     

                       

    There's no other way.



     

                       

    You've got to give them the key

    to everything that's yours.



     

                       

    Otherwise, what's the point?



     

                       

    And, for a while, I believed

    that's the kind of love I had.



     

                       

    [Choir Singing]



     

                       

    Before I ever ran a casino,

    or got myself blown up...



     

                       

    Ace Rothstein was a hell

    of a handicapper, I can tell you that.



     

                       

    I was so good that whenever I bet,

    I could change the odds...



      

                       

    for every bookmaker

    in the country.



      

                       

    I'm serious,

    I had it down so cold...



      

                       

    that I was given

    paradise on earth.



      

                       

    I was given one of the biggest casinos

    in Las Vegas to run, the Tangiers...



      

                       

    by the only kind of guys that can

    actually get you that kind of money...



      

                       

    $        .



      

                       

    I don't know all the details.



      

                       

    [Man #  Narrating]

    Nobody knew all the details,

    but it should've been perfect.



      

                       

    I mean, he had me, Nicky Santoro,

    his best friend, watching his ass...



      

                       

    and he had, Ginger,

    the woman he loved, on his arm.



      

                       

    But in the end,

    we fucked it all up.



      

                       

    It should've been so sweet too.



      

                       

    But it turned out to be the last time

    that street guys like us...



      

                       

    were ever given anything

    that fuckin' valuable again.



      

                       

    [Ace]

    At that time, Vegas was a place

    where millions of suckers...



      

                       

    flew in every year

    on their own nickel...



      

                       

    and left behind

    about a billion dollars.



      

                       

    But at night, you couldn't see

    the desert that surrounds Las Vegas.



      

                       

    But it's in the desert where lots

    of the town's problems are solved.



      

                       

    [Nicky] Got a lot of holes

    in the desert...



      

                       

    and a lot of problems

    are buried in those holes.



      

                       

    Except you gotta do it right.



      

                       

    I mean, you gotta have

    the hole already dug...



      

                       

    before you show up

    with a package in the trunk.



      

                       

    Otherwise, you're talking about

    a half hour or    minutes of diggin'.



      

                       

    And who knows who's gonna

    be comin' along in that time?



      

                       

    Before you know it,

    you gotta dig a few more holes.



      

                       

    You could be there

    all fuckin' night.



      

                       

    [Scatting]



      

                       

    [Horn Honking]



      

                       

    [Scatting Continues]



      

                       

    [Ace] Who could resist?



      

                       

    Anywhere else in the country

    I was a bookie, a gambler...



      

                       

    always lookin' over my shoulder,

    hassled by cops, day and night.



      

                       

    But here, I'm Mr. Rothstein.



      

                       

    I'm not only legitimate,

    but running a casino.



      

                       

    And that's like selling people

    dreams for cash.



      

                       

    I hired an old casino pal,

    Billy Sherbert, as my manager,

    and I went to work.



      

                       

    ...the casino manager. And this is

    Ronnie, who takes care of the card room.



      

                       

    [Ace] For guys like me,

    Las Vegas washes away your sins.



      

                       

    It's like a morality car wash.



      

                       

    It does for us what Lourdes

    does for humpbacks and cripples.



      

                       

    And along with making us legit...



      

                       

    comes cash, tons of it.



      

                       

    I mean, what do you think we're doing

    out here in the middle of the desert?



      

                       

    It's all this money.



      

                       

    This is the end result

    of all the bright lights...



      

                       

    and the comp trips,

    of all the champagne...



      

                       

    and free hotel suites,

    and all the broads and all the booze.



      

                       

    It's all been arranged

    just for us to get your money.



      

                       

    That's the truth about Las Vegas.



      

                       

    We're the only winners.



      

                       

    The players don't stand a chance.



      

                       

    And their cash flows

    from the tables...



      

                       

    to our boxes

    through the cage...



      

                       

    and into the most sacred room

    in the casino.



      

                       

    The place where they add up

    all the money...



      

                       

    the holy of holies,

    the count room.



      

                       

    - Now, this place was off-limits.

    - Verify     .



      

                       

    Even I couldn't get inside.



      

                       

    But it was my job to keep it filled

    with cash. That's for sure.



      

                       

    [Nicky] They had so much

    fuckin' money in there...



      

                       

    you could build a house out

    of stacks of hundred-dollar bills.



      

                       

    And the best part

    was that upstairs...



      

                       

    - the board of directors didn't

    know what the fuck was going on.

    - Five thousand.



      

                       

    I mean, to them everything

    looked on the up and up.



      

                       

    Right? Wrong.



      

                       

    Verify     .



      

                       

    - The guys inside the counting room...

    - Five thousand.



      

                       

    were all slipped in there

    to skim the joint dry.



      

                       

    They'd do short counts,

    they'd lose fill slips.



      

                       

    They'd even take cash

    right out of the drop boxes.



      

                       

    And it was up to this guy

    right here...



      

                       

    standin' in front

    of about two million dollars...



      

                       

    to skim the cash off the top

    without anybody gettin' wise...



      

                       

    - the IRS or anybody.

    - Verify    .



      

                       

    Now, notice how in the count room

    nobody ever seems to see anything.



      

                       

    Somehow, somebody's always

    lookin' the other way.



      

                       

    Now, look at these guys.

    They look busy, right?



      

                       

    They're countin' money.

    Who wants to bother them?



      

                       

    I mean, God forbid they should make

    a mistake and forget to steal.



      

                       

    Meanwhile,

    you're in and you're out.



      

                       

    Past the jag-off guard

    who gets an extra C-note a week...



      

                       

    just to watch the door.



      

                       

    It's routine. Business as usual:

    in, out, hello, good-bye.



      

                       

    And that's all there is to it.



      

                       

    Just another fat fuck walkin' out

    of the casino with a suitcase.



      

                       

    Now that suitcase was goin'

    straight to one place:



      

                       

    Right to Kansas City,

    which was as close...



      

                       

    to Las Vegas as the Midwest

    bosses could go...



       

                       

    without gettin' themselves arrested.



       

                       

    That suitcase was all...



       

                       

    the bosses ever wanted.



       

                       

    - And they wanted it every month.

    - Hey, John, how was your ride?



       

                       

    Now this old Mormon fuck here...



       

                       

    he had to fly in with suitcases

    once a month, nice and easy.



       

                       

    - Somethin' smells good.

    - Yeah, they made us somethin' to eat.



       

                       

    The bosses would come

    from all over the place:



       

                       

    Detroit, Cleveland, Milwaukee...



       

                       

    all over the Midwest.



       

                       

    And they would meet in the back

    of this produce market in Kansas City.



       

                       

    I mean, nobody even knew it.



       

                       

    One of the guys made

    his mother do all the cookin'.



       

                       

    - Do you ever see that guy

    Jerry Steriano?

    - Jerry Steriano?



       

                       

    Now, these old greaseballs

    might not look it...



       

                       

    but believe me...



       

                       

    these are the guys

    who secretly control Las Vegas.



       

                       

    Mama, that man's here again.



       

                       

    Because they control

    the Teamsters Union.



       

                       

    And that's where you had to go if you

    wanted to borrow money to buy a casino.



       

                       

    - Would you put in shrimp?

    - I would.



       

                       

    Here you are, gentlemen.



       

                       

    Nobody got a Teamsters' loan

    unless the guys in this room...



       

                       

    knew they were gonna get

    their little suitcases.



       

                       

    Guys like this antique over here,

    out of Detroit.



       

                       

    Or especially guys like Remo Gaggi,

    the outfit's top boss.



       

                       

    You got a round figure on it?



       

                       

    - Definitely the most

    important guy in this room.

    - About    pounds.



       

                       

    - That's around       .

    - Uh-huh, good.



       

                       

    [Man] I know it's

    a little early for Las Vegas...



       

                       

    [Laughter]



       

                       

    but I do want to welcome the ladies

    and gentlemen of the gaming industry.



       

                       

    [Ace] As far as the world

    was concerned...



       

                       

    Andy Stone, the head of

    the Teamsters' Pension Fund...



       

                       

    - was a legitimate guy.

    - This is a very auspicious occasion.



       

                       

    - A powerful man.

    - Philip, if you would rise.



       

                       

    He even played golf

    with the president.



       

                       

    On behalf of the Teamsters'

    Pension Fund...



       

                       

    - it is my pleasure to present to you...

    - But Andy also took orders.



       

                       

    And when he was told to give

    a pension fund loan to Philip Green...



       

                       

    this check for $        ...



       

                       

    for the new Tangiers.



       

                       

    he did what he was told.



       

                       

    [Nicky] Now, here was

    the perfect front man.



       

                       

    What the fuck else could he be?

    He didn't know too much.



       

                       

    He didn't want to know

    too much...



       

                       

    especially that the bosses made

    the Teamsters lend him the money.



       

                       

    He wanted to believe

    the Teamsters...



       

                       

    gave him all that fuckin' money

    'cause he was smart.



       

                       

    I know full well how much competition

    we have in this great city.



       

                       

    And where they got Green from?



       

                       

    Who the fuck knows?



       

                       

    All I know is that Green was

    an Arizona real estate hustler...



       

                       

    who barely had

    enough gas money...



       

                       

    to come and pick up

    his own fuckin' check.



       

                       

    And of course it was

    the bosses' man...



       

                       

    Andy Stone,

    who gave all the orders.



       

                       

    Not the chairman

    of the fuckin' board, Philip Green.



       

                       

    I understand.

    I understand.



       

                       

    Now all they needed was...



       

                       

    somebody they could trust

    to run the casino.



       

                       

    And who better than Ace? I mean, he was

    already in Vegas a couple years...



       

                       

    and he had

    the fuckin' place clocked.



       

                       

    But typical Ace, give him a shot

    at runnin' a casino...



       

                       

    and he tries

    to talk you out of it.



       

                       

    I don't know if I could do this

    even if I wanted to.



       

                       

    The Gaming Commission

    would never give me a license.



       

                       

    I have at least two dozen

    gambling and bookmaking pinches on me.



       

                       

    You don't have to have a license

    to work in a casino.



       

                       

    All you gotta do

    is apply for one.



       

                       

    The state law says that

    you can work in a casino...



       

                       

    while they're processing

    your application.



       

                       

    They got a ten-year backlog.



       

                       

    What happens when

    they do find out?



       

                       

    Why would they

    want to find out?



       

                       

    We're puttin' a hundred million

    into this desert.

    Why would they want to lock us out?



       

                       

    They'll never find out. All you gotta do

    is keep changing your job title.



       

                       

    Like, uh, from Casino Executive

    to Food and Beverage Chairman.



       

                       

    They take your application,

    they put it at the bottom of the pile.



       

                       

    I know guys been workin' there

    for    years, don't have a license.



       

                       

    It's a tough proposition, Andy.



       

                       

    You know if I did it,

    I'd have to run it my way.



       

                       

    You got it.



       

                       

    I'm serious, no interference.



       

                       

    Nobody's gonna interfere

    with your running the casino.



       

                       

    I guarantee it.



       

                       

    [Nicky] And that's how

    they got Ace to take over.



       

                       

    They wanted him because Ace ate,

    slept and breathed gambling.



       

                       

    They worked out

    a real cute job title too...



       

                       

    Tangiers Public Relations Director.



       

                       

    But the only thing he ever

    directed was the casino.



       

                       

    He made his first bet when he was

       years old, and he always made money.



       

                       

    But he didn't bet

    like you or me.



       

                       

    You know, havin' some fun

    with it, shit like that.



       

                       

    Where the hell

    did you learn how to deal?



       

                       

    He bet like a fuckin'

    brain surgeon.



       

                       

    Place the checks properly.



       

                       

    - That's the way you do it.

    - Yes, sir.



       

                       

    He had to know everything,

    this guy.



       

                       

    He'd find out the kind

    of inside stuff nobody else knew...



       

                       

    and that's what he'd put

    his money on.



       

                       

    Even back home, years ago...



       

                       

    when we were first hangin' out...



       

                       

    he'd know if the quarterback

    was on coke...



       

                       

    I'll take Columbia for   .



       

                       

    - if his girlfriend was knocked up.

    - Twenty dimes on Columbia.



       

                       

    He'd get the wind velocity

    so he could judge the field goals.



       

                       

    He even figured out

    the different bounce...



       

                       

    you got off the different kinds

    of wood they used...



       

                       

    on college basketball courts,

    you know?



       

                       

    He'd be workin'

    on this shit day and night.



       

                       

    There was nothing about a game

    he was gonna bet that he didn't know.



       

                       

    Ace got down at six.

    Get me down at six.



       

                       

    Season after season...



       

                       

    the prick was the only

    guaranteed winner I ever knew.



       

                       

    But he was so serious

    about it all...



       

                       

    that I don't think

    he ever enjoyed himself.



       

                       

    But that's just the way he was.



       

                       

    But back then, the bosses

    didn't give a fuck...



       

                       

    about whether

    he enjoyed himself or not.



       

                       

    To them, he was

    a cash register.



       

                       

    All they had to do was

    ring the bell and take money.



       

                       

    Especially Remo...



       

                       

    who was a fuckin' degenerate

    gambler who always lost...



       

                       

    Cazzo!

    [Mumbles In Italian]



       

                       

    All those fuckin' sweeps.



       

                       

    - unless Ace made his bets.

    - Enough now!



       

                       

    Ace made more money

    for them on a weekend...



       

                       

    than I could do heisting

    joints for a month.



       

                       

    Whatever Ace picked up

    on the street, he told Remo.



       

                       

    I mean, fixed fights,

    doped horses...



       

                       

    crooked fuckin' zebras,

    locked-in point spreads.



       

                       

    He told fuckin' Remo everything.



       

                       

    And to tell you the truth,

    I don't blame him.



       

                       

    - Hey!

    - Keepin' Remo happy with money...



       

                       

    was the greatest insurance

    policy in the world.



       

                       

    Son of a bitch!



       

                       

    How the hell did you get

    Oklahoma-Michigan?



       

                       

    Nobody ever had Oklahoma-Mi...

    How the hell'd you do it?



       

                       

    Well, that's why

    they paid so well.



       

                       

    You see?

    Never tells me nothin'.



       

                       

    What do we got on

    for next week?



       

                       

    Well, it's a little too early.

    I'd say Thursday would be good.

    Is that all right?



       

                       

    - Okay, you'll come by the house?

    - I'll come by.



       

                       

     :  . Good job, my boy.

    Keep it up? Okay, Ace?



       

                       

    Hey, Nick. Vien acca.



       

                       

    - I'll be right out.

    - T'aggia parla.



       

                       

    Nicky, see that guy?

    Keep a good eye on him.



       

                       

    He's makin'

    a lot of money for us.



       

                       

    And he's gonna continue makin' a lot of

    money for us, so keep a good eye on him.



       

                       

    Not like your fuckin' friends

    out there that... without brains.



       

                       

    - Okay?

    - All right.



       

                       

    - Mi raccomando.

    - Yeah. Want me to take this for you?



       

                       

    [Nicky] So now,

    on top of everything else...



       

                       

    I gotta make sure nobody fucks around

    with the golden Jew.



       

                       

    Chase, couple of shooters

    for the ladies.



       

                       

    [Ace]

    Yeah, we made a great pair.



       

                       

    I made book and Nicky made sure

    we always collected.



       

                       

    The old men loved us,

    and why not?



       

                       

    - They all made money with us.

    - They payin'?



       

                       

    - How did Nicky collect?

    - They pay every week,

    like they're supposed to.



       

                       

    - Don't ask.

    - And where the fuck is the money,

    I don't see any money.



       

                       

    - Hi, Melissa, Heidi.

    - Hi, Sam.



       

                       

    Who's this guy?



       

                       

    - Get the fuck out of here.

    It was nine. I laid nine.

    - It was eight.



       

                       

    Ace, tell him the line

    on the Bear game.



       

                       

    - Eight.

    - If he don't know, nobody knows.



       

                       

    - Told you it was eight.

    - How come I laid nine?



       

                       

    'Cause you're a jag-off.



       

                       

    - Excuse me.

    - What?



       

                       

    - Is this yours? Your pen?

    - Yeah, that's my pen. Why?



       

                       

    No, it's a nice pen.

    I just didn't know whose it was.



       

                       

    I thought it was yours.

    I didn't want it to get lost.



       

                       

    Well, thank you.

    Why don't you take that fuckin' pen...



       

                       

    and shove it up your ass,

    you fuckin' jag-off.



       

                       

    - Well, I was just offering you the...

    - This fuckin' assho...



       

                       

    Look out, Joe. Look out.



       

                       

    [Grunts]



       

                       

    [Groaning]



       

                       

    What's that?

    You hear a little girl, Frankie?



       

                       

    Hear a little girl, Ace?

    Is that a little fuckin' girl?



       

                       

    What happened

    to the fuckin' tough guy...



       

                       

    - told my friend to stick it

    up his fuckin' ass?

    - [Moans]



       

                       

    - Nicky, take it easy. Nicky, Nicky.

    - [Moans]



       

                       

    [Ace] While I was trying

    to figure out why the guy was saying...



       

                       

    what he was saying,

    Nicky just hit him.



       

                       

    No matter how big a guy might be,

    Nicky would take him on.



       

                       

    You beat Nicky with fists,

    he comes back with a bat.



       

                       

    You beat him with a knife,

    he comes back with a gun.



       

                       

    And if you beat him with a gun,

    you better kill him...



       

                       

    because he'll keep coming

    back and back...



       

                       

    until one of you is dead.



       

                       

    [Nicky] Listen,

    with me protectin' Ace...



       

                       

    he made a fortune

    for the bosses.



       

                       

    I mean, that's

    what got him to Vegas.



       

                       

    He was a money machine.



       

                       

    A tremendous earner

    for these guys.



       

                       

    As soon as he took over,

    he doubled the fuckin' drop.



       

                       

    With Ace, the casino

    never saw so much money.



       

                       

    And the bosses,

    they couldn't be happier.



       

                       

    I got $   



       

                       

    Don't you mess with me



       

                       

    But you know I'm down



       

                       

    Everybody knows I'm down



       

                       

    [Ace] In Vegas, I had to keep

    a few juiced-in local cowboys working.



       

                       

    They were close to the,

    you know, good old boys.



       

                       

    I mean, without us, these guys,

    they'd still be shoveling mule shit.



       

                       

    Ward, you've got to keep

    a cleaner space.



       

                       

    If you need Mr. Clean,

    page him, all right?



       

                       

    Won't happen again, Sam.



       

                       

    - Mr. Rothstein.

    - Mr. Rothstein. Won't

    happen again, Mr. Rothstein.



       

                       

    Is this guy just another dumb fucking

    white man, or what? What's the story?



       

                       

    - You need this guy.

    - Can't get rid of him?



       

                       

    He's juiced in.

    He's the County Commissioner's cousin.



       

                       

    I wouldn't give the bum

    a mop job.



       

                       

    But still, I had no choice.

    I had to take care of them.



       

                       

    These yokels ran the state.



       

                       

    Thank you very much,

    Senator.



       

                       

    - They passed the laws,

    they owned the courts.

    - Hi, Ace. Hey, I need a room.



       

                       

    - I had dozens of politicians

    and state officials...

    - The Cedar Room.



       

                       

    coming through that place

    every week.



       

                       

    - Help the Senator,

    get him whatever he wants.

    - Certainly.



       

                       

    Why not make him happy?



       

                       

    ...the Presidential Suite.



       

                       

    For politicians like our State Senator

    up there, everything was on the house.



       

                       

    These guys won their comp life

    when they got elected...



       

                       

    so, hey, why not

    take advantage of it.



       

                       

    Still, the politicians came cheap.

    We could handle them.



       

                       

    It's a whale

    like K.K. Ichikawa...



       

                       

    who plays $      a hand

    in baccarat...



       

                       

    that's the one

    you really gotta watch.



       

                       

    He plays fast and big

    and he has the cash and the credit...



       

                       

    to turn out your lights.



       

                       

    About a year ago he cleaned out a couple

    of casinos in the Cayman Islands.



       

                       

    Downstairs he takes us

    for two million...



       

                       

    and upstairs he takes free

    soap, shampoo and towels.



       

                       

    Another billionaire cheapskate

    who loved his free rooms...



       

                       

    free private jets and

    two million of our money.



       

                       

    But we got him back.



       

                       

    I had our pilot tell him

    the plane was on the fritz.



       

                       

    I don't know what the hell went wrong.

    I'm awfully sorry.



       

                       

    I can't understand it. These mechanical

    things, you know they happen.



       

                       

    Hey, but better here than

    up there, you know what I mean.



       

                       

    Then he missed the commercial

    flights connecting with Japan.



       

                       

    I can't believe that there's

    a convention; there's no room.



       

                       

    We got him back with a whole floor

    of rooms to himself.



       

                       

    - I'm sorry you missed your plane.

    - Glad to get to know you.



       

                       

    Oh, no. No gambling.



       

                       

    And once he was back,

    he played small.



       

                       

    He bet      a hand,

    instead of his usual       a hand.



       

                       

    ...to the bank

    with a natural lead over a five.



       

                       

    But I knew the trick

    with whales like Ichikawa...



       

                       

    was that they can't bet

    small for long.



       

                       

    He didn't think of it

    as winning      ...



       

                       

    he thought of it

    as losing      .



       

                       

    So, he upped his bets.



       

                       

    Until he dropped his winnings back

    and gave up a million of his own cash.



       

                       

    In the casino, the cardinal rule

    is to keep them playing...



       

                       

    and keep them coming back.



       

                       

    The longer they play,

    the more they lose.



       

                       

    In the end, we get it all.



       

                       

    Goddamn it

    Trying to make it real



       

                       

    Compared to what



       

                       

    Sock it to me



       

                       

    In Vegas, everybody's

    gotta watch everybody else.



       

                       

    Six. All right,

    who's gonna give me that?



       

                       

    Since the players are looking

    to beat the casino...



       

                       

    Each and every roll,

    all right.



       

                       

    - the dealers are watching

    the players...

    - Six.



       

                       

    - Fake a six.

    - the boxmen are watching the dealers.



       

                       

    the floormen are watching

    the boxmen...



       

                       

    the pit bosses are watching

    the floormen...



       

                       

    the shift bosses are watching

    the pit bosses...



       

                       

    the casino manager is watching

    the shift bosses...



       

                       

    I'm watching the casino manager...



       

                       

    and the eye in the sky

    is watching us all.



       

                       

    Plus, we had

    a dozen guys up there...



       

                       

    most of them ex-cheats, who knew

    every trick in the house.



       

                       

    Tryin' to make it real

    compared to what



       

                       

    Yes!



       

                       

    - Very nice.

    - I told you I was hot tonight.



       

                       

    Lookin' good.

    Lookin' good.



       

                       

    Let's go.

    This is for Ginger. Come on.



       

                       

    Let me have a hundred

    on your hard ten.



       

                       

    Hundred on your hard ten.

    Thank you.



       

                       

    Here we go now.

    Yeeeow!



       

                       

    - Oh, I'm sorry.

    - The dice...



       

                       

    Thank you very much.

    Thank you very much.



       

                       

    - Thank you, sir. I appreciate it.

    - You were great.



       

                       

    Thanks. Take care, Steve.

    Take chances, drive fast.



       

                       

    This hundred is for you, love.

    Thanks for your time.



       

                       

    - Come on.

    - What's the matter?



       

                       

    What do you mean? I made a lot

    of money for you, I want my cut.



       

                       

    What money? I've seen

    you stealing from me.



       

                       

    What money?

    Look at the stack of chips.



       

                       

    - I want my half.

    - I've been watching you all night.



       

                       

    - I want my money.

    - Your bag is full of fucking chips.



       

                       

    - I didn't steal anything from you.

    - Get lost!



       

                       

    Get lost? Get lost?

    Yes! Yes!



       

                       

    - Well, how about that?

    - Come on!



       

                       

    Slippin' and a-slidin'

    Changin' and a-hidin'



       

                       

    Been told a long time ago



       

                       

    I been told

    Baby, you've been born



       

                       

    I won't be your fool no more

    Oww



       

                       

    Baby, oh, baby



       

                       

    My sweet baby



       

                       

    You're the one



       

                       

    [Ace] What a move.



       

                       

    I fell in love right there.



       

                       

    But in Vegas, for a girl

    like Ginger, love costs money.



       

                       

    What's different about him



       

                       

    I don't really know



       

                       

    I'm gonna go powder my nose.



       

                       

    No matter how I try



       

                       

    I just can't make him cry



       

                       

    - [Ace] Ginger's mission

    in life was money.

    - I'll be right back.



       

                       

    - See you, Ginger.

    - Okay, thank you for asking.



       

                       

    She was a queen

    around the casino.



       

                       

    She brought in high rollers...



       

                       

    and helped them spread

    around a lot of money.



       

                       

    - Hello.

    - Hey, Ginger. How you doing?



       

                       

    Great, and I have something for you.

    You got me covered?



       

                       

    - And you do. Thank you very much.

    - Take care of yourself.



       

                       

    - I got some lucky pills for you, Andy.

    - Oh, yeah.



       

                       

    Who didn't want Ginger?

    She was one of the best known...



       

                       

    best liked and

    most respected hustlers in town.



       

                       

    Smart hustlers like her

    could keep a guy awake...



       

                       

    for two or three days

    before sending him home broke...



       

                       

    to the little woman

    and his bank examiners.



       

                       

    You only make me glad



       

                       

    Better listen, little girl



       

                       

    You're goin' walkin'

    down the street



       

                       

    I ain't got no love



       

                       

    Any change?



       

                       

    Oh, I hit a few games

    on the way back.



       

                       

    But that was all bullshit,

    she just pocketed the cash.



       

                       

    This heart of stone



       

                       

    - How you doin' tonight?

    - Good.



       

                       

    - How are you?

    - Uh, beat.



       

                       

    - [Ace] Ginger had the hustlers code.

    - Take one for you.



       

                       

    - Thank you.

    - She knew how to take care of people.



       

                       

    And that's what Vegas

    is all about.



       

                       

    - Sixty-eight hundred.

    - Thanks.



       

                       

    - It's kickback city.

    - Have a good night.



       

                       

    Thank you. You too.



       

                       

    - She took care of the dealers...

    - Hey, Mitch.



       

                       

    pit bosses, floor managers...



       

                       

    but, mostly, she took care

    of the valet parkers...



       

                       

    the guys who could get you anything

    and take care of anything.



       

                       

    Ginger took care of the parkers...



       

                       

    because they took care

    of the security guards...



       

                       

    - who took care of the metro cops,

    who let her operate.

    - I need that stuff tonight.



       

                       

    - No problem.

    - You are a doll.



       

                       

    The valet parking job

    was such a money-maker...



       

                       

    they had to pay off the hotel manager

    just to get the concession.



       

                       

    But one thing

    I just could never understand...



       

                       

    was that she could have

    everything under control...



       

                       

    except for her old pimp

    boyfriend, Lester Diamond.



       

                       

    Gin, you know I got other people

    in this, they got partners.



       

                       

    I want you to understand

    that I am looking out for you...



       

                       

    in this thing, okay?



       

                       

    You're gonna get yours back,

    and you're gonna get back first, okay?



       

                       

    - All right, yeah.

    - Where you going?



       

                       

    Where are you? You're

    in that place. Where are you?



       

                       

    - I'm here.

    - No, you're not.



       

                       

    Where are you?

    Where are you?



       

                       

    I'm always here for you.



       

                       

    - You're my woman.

    - I know.



       

                       

    [Ace] The Ginger I knew wouldn't

    even look at this creep.



       

                       

    - Good luck.

    - Yeah.



       

                       

    He was a moocher,

    a card cheat...



       

                       

    a country club golf hustler,

    a scumbag.



       

                       

    - Chasing dentists for a few bucks.

    - Careful.



       

                       

    The guy was always broke.

    He always had a story.



       

                       

    And somehow she could never

    turn him down.



       

                       

    The way Ginger saw it, I guess,

    was that Lester was just an unlucky guy.



       

                       

    Somebody had

    to take care of him.



       

                       

    But nobody

    had to take care of Nicky.



       

                       

    If you find any cash in there,

    we'll whack it up with you.



       

                       

    I mean, he took care

    of himself only too well.



       

                       

    - That's why every badge...

    - I folded these things beautifully.



       

                       

    - back home wanted to nail him.

    - I would appreciate a little respect.



       

                       

    - Look at me, pal,

    I gotta live with her.

    - Jesus Christ.



       

                       

    Volare



       

                       

    Even after a little vacation,

    they hassled him at the airport.



       

                       

    I mean, Frank Marino was there

    to meet him, but so were the cops.



       

                       

    This time they wanted

    to pinch him...



       

                       

    - for some diamond burglary in Antwerp.

    - Will you help me fold these?



       

                       

    They were ready to blame him for

    anything, no matter where it happened.



       

                       

    - Put your things away.

    - And they were usually right.



       

                       

    - Hold it, hold it. Here.

    - Because Nicky enjoyed

    being a gangster.



       

                       

    - And he didn't give a damn who knew it.

    - Come on, there we go.



       

                       

    Look at this. Beautiful!



       

                       

    I mean, that's what worried me.

    'Cause it turns out,

    Nicky was about to be sent to Vegas.



       

                       

    - All right, we're clear.

    - There's more.



       

                       

    There's a couple stuck in there.

    I know there's more.



       

                       

    - I'm telling you, they're out!

    - Come on.



       

                       

    Don't get so defensive,

    it could be stuck in your hair.



       

                       

    What's that?

    Huh, what's that?



       

                       

    There's no more.

    Thanks, hon.



       

                       

    [Nicky] I couldn't wait to get

    my hands on Vegas.



       

                       

    But the bosses didn't send me

    out there to have a good time.



       

                       

    They sent me out there to make sure

    that nobody fucked with Ace.



       

                       

    And nobody interfered

    with the fuckin' skim.



       

                       

    - Hey.

    - Hey, how you doin'?



       

                       

    Hey, Sammy.



       

                       

    - Boy, look at this place, huh?

    - Incredible.



       

                       

    Welcome to Vegas.



       

                       

    - Okay, Sammy.

    - Something, huh?



       

                       

    Ginger.



       

                       

    Holy shit. What've you

    been doing out here?



       

                       

    Honey, come here.



       

                       

    This is Jennifer and Nick,

    they're dear friends of mine.



       

                       

    - Hi, Jennifer.

    - A pleasure.



       

                       

    Okay, Sammy.



       

                       

    [Ace] After we ate,

    we left Jennifer and Ginger alone...



       

                       

    and we took a ride to talk.



       

                       

    And then, he hit me with it.



       

                       

    What do you think about me

    moving out here?



       

                       

    What's the matter?

    You got a problem with that?



       

                       

    - No, of course not.

    - You mean, I have your permission?



       

                       

    Sure, you have my permission.

    But I just gotta tell you...



       

                       

    it's no joke out here,

    it's no joke.



       

                       

    You gotta keep a low profile.



       

                       

    It's not like back home. Right off

    the bat, they don't like guys like us.



       

                       

    And this sheriff's

    a real cowboy.



       

                       

    Even the coppers aren't afraid

    to bury people out in the desert here.



       

                       

    I don't care. I wanna get

    away from back home for a while.



       

                       

    I'm tired of that shit

    back there.



       

                       

    Look at this place,

    it's made of money.



       

                       

    You know what the best part is,

    nobody's gonna know what we're doing.



       

                       

    There's nobody here to see us.

    Everybody's back home.



       

                       

    Nick, I gotta tell you.

    I got pinched twice for no reason.



       

                       

    I really gotta be careful.



       

                       

    I'm running a licensed place,

    everything's legit.



       

                       

    Don't worry about it.

    I'm not gonna do anything.



       

                       

    I'm especially not gonna

    involve you in anything.



       

                       

    [Nicky]

    Ace saw Vegas one way...



       

                       

    - You call this guy

    and tell him I'm comin'?

    - Of course.



       

                       

    but I saw it another.



       

                       

    I saw it as untouched.



       

                       

    I mean, they had bookies, pimps...



       

                       

    and drug dealers

    I could shake down.



       

                       

    Who the fuck

    were they gonna run to?



       

                       

    So I started gettin'

    everybody in line.



       

                       

    Best of all,

    for the first time in my life...



       

                       

    I figured out a way

    not to lose.



       

                       

    [Ace] Yeah, he had

    a foolproof scheme, all right.



       

                       

    It wasn't very scientific,

    but it worked.



       

                       

    When he won, he collected;



       

                       

    when he lost, he told the bookies

    to go fuck themselves.



       

                       

    What were they gonna do,

    muscle Nicky?



       

                       

    - Hey, how you doin'?

    - How you doin'?



       

                       

    - You got that thing for me?

    - What thing?



       

                       

    Oh, Nicky. I thought

    you was layin'.



       

                       

    No, no, I'm takin'.

    I was takin'.



       

                       

    - You sure?

    - I'm positive.



       

                       

    - I'm a little confused.

    - You're a little confused?



       

                       

    Maybe if I stick your fuckin'

    face through this window...



       

                       

    you'll get unconfused.



       

                       

    - Gimme the fuckin' money.

    - I'm sorry, Nick.



       

                       

    I didn't mean anything by it.



       

                       

    That's why you had it ready.

    You thought I was fuckin' layin' it?



       

                       

    - My fuckin' head.

    - Smarten up.



       

                       

    And now Nicholas Santoro will come up

    and tell us about our first president.



       

                       

    George Washington was born...



       

                       

    [Ace] But still,

    it was nice and quiet for a while.



       

                       

    Ginger and I presented

    Nicky and Jennifer all over town...



       

                       

    like regular Ozzie and Harriets.



       

                       

    Beautiful, you got

    a beautiful son.



       

                       

    [Nicky] Ace got my son, little Nicky,

    involved in Little League.



       

                       

    Turned out to be one

    of the other coaches...



       

                       

    was a fuckin'

    metro intelligence cop.



       

                       

    But it didn't matter,

    it was all about the kids.



       

                       

    He's gotta realize that everything

    can't be a home run that he does.



       

                       

    That's exactly what

    I keep tellin' him...



       

                       

    but that's the kind of kid he is.



       

                       

    [Ace] And Nicky, being Nicky,

    he made his presence known.



       

                       

    Especially at the casino,

    where he definitely did not work...



       

                       

    people got the message.



       

                       

    [Nicky] Me, that's why

    the bosses sent me out here.



       

                       

    They wanted me to make sure none

    of the other crews robbed the joint.



       

                       

    Like these two fuckin'

    balloon heads over here.



       

                       

    They were gonna try to bang us

    out of     fuckin' grand...



       

                       

    - yeah, right, I'm sure.

    - Hey! How are you?



       

                       

    How are you?

    What are you doing here?



       

                       

    I'm over here now.



       

                       

    - You're over here?

    - Yeah, I'm over here with them.



       

                       

    We're waiting on Carmine.



       

                       

    Yeah, we're looking

    for Carmine.



       

                       

    He was here before. He had

    a suitcase and then he left.



       

                       

    - Carmine left?

    - Carmine left?



       

                       

    He's gone?



       

                       

    He's not here?



       

                       

    Carmine's out?



       

                       

    I think maybe he went

    across the street...



       

                       

    or somewhere else

    or somethin'.



       

                       

    Well, listen, good luck

    with the joint.



       

                       

    - Ah, thanks, Eddie.

    - Yeah, lots of luck.



       

                       

    - Yeah, good luck to you too.

    - Hey, they forgot to sign their papers.



       

                       

    Yeah, they don't

    need those anymore.



       

                       

    [Ace] Guys from other crews

    got away with a warning.



       

                       

    Everybody else, watch out.



       

                       

    Like these yokels here...



       

                       

    who never heard of Nicky

    or the bosses back home.



       

                       

    'Cause they're the morons

    who give you the most trouble.



       

                       

    Even after we'd catch them,

    they'd try sneaking back...



       

                       

    with beards

    and wigs and fake noses.



       

                       

    You can spot these assholes

    by watching the way they bet.



       

                       

    You can spot these assholes

    by watching the way they bet.



       

                       

    Like this guy,

    he's bettin' lavender chips...



       

                       

    at     each with only

    one little problem...



       

                       

    he's always guessed right.



       

                       

    If he wasn't so fuckin' greedy,

    he'd have been tougher to spot.



       

                       

    But in the end,

    they're all greedy.



       

                       

    I got a feelin'

    about the future



       

                       

    And it ain't too good

    I know that



       

                       

    I saw that the dealer was weak,

    but he wasn't in on it.



       

                       

    He just wasn't

    protecting his hand.



       

                       

    He was lifting

    his hole card way too high.



       

                       

    Now, here's this guy reading

    the dealer's hole card...



       

                       

    and signaling his buddy

    at this table.



       

                       

    [Electronic Beeping]



       

                       

    And that's just what

    these hustlers look for.



       

                       

    They cruise from casino to casino

    looking for weak dealers...



       

                       

    the way lions

    look for weak antelope.



       

                       

    Operator, this is Mr. R.



       

                       

    Get me Armstrong and Friday

    over at pit two right away.



       

                       

    BJ    second base, the beard.



       

                       

    Operator, I need Mr. Happy. Loud.



       

                       

    Happy birthday to you



       

                       

    Happy birthday to you



       

                       

    Happy birthday, dear Jeff



       

                       

    Happy birthday to you



       

                       

    [Groans]



       

                       

    Man down!



       

                       

    Go get medical.

    We got a cardiac arrest here.



       

                       

    He's fine, folks.

    Just give us some room, please.



       

                       

    [Ace] They never know

    what hit them.



       

                       

    And if and when

    they do find out...



       

                       

    that they just got zapped

    by a cattle prod...



       

                       

    they wish they really did

    have a heart attack.



       

                       

    Turns out this guy

    and his fuckin' pals...



       

                       

    they were knocking

    this place dead for years.



       

                       

    - He's got a wire on him.

    - Hey, hey, what are you doing?



       

                       

    There it is.

    That's it.



       

                       

    - Cheater's justice.

    - Oh, God!



       

                       

    No, no, no!



       

                       

    [Ace]

    I wanted everybody to know...



       

                       

    that things were changed

    around here.



       

                       

    We had to make an example

    of these pricks...



       

                       

    that the party was over.



       

                       

    I'm just curious.

    I saw you shuffling your checks...



       

                       

    with your right hand.



       

                       

    - Can you do that with both hands?

    - No.



       

                       

    - You can't do it with both hands?

    - No, sir.



       

                       

    Can you do it

    with your left hand?



       

                       

    Well, I never tried.



       

                       

    - So, you're a righty.

    - Yeah.



       

                       

    [Screams]



       

                       

    [Groans]



       

                       

    Now you're gonna have to learn

    with your left hand.



       

                       

    - It's         I think.

    - Yes, it is.



       

                       

    Okay.



       

                       

    Hiya. That's a lot of money

    to be counting out in public.



       

                       

    Why don't I take him...



       

                       

    over to the office

    and verify it?



       

                       

    A little privacy.

    And by the way...



       

                       

    send over a nice bottle

    of champagne on ice.



       

                       

    - Sure will.

    - Real special.



       

                       

    - By the way, I'm Billy Sherbert,

    casino manager.

    - Hi.



       

                       

    - Having a good time?

    - Yes.



       

                       

    You want to count

    the money in privacy.



       

                       

    I have a plane to catch to Cleveland.

    Can I get my winnings?



       

                       

    Look what they did

    to my hand, man.



       

                       

    All right,

    I'm gonna give you a choice:



       

                       

    You can either have the money and

    the hammer or you can walk out of here.



       

                       

    - What do you want?

    - I just wanna get out of here.



       

                       

    And don't forget to tell your friends

    what happens if they fuck around here.



       

                       

    - I'm sorry, I made a bad mistake.

    - You're fuckin' right

    you made a bad mistake.



       

                       

    'Cause if you come back here,

    and we catch either one of you...



       

                       

    we're gonna break your heads

    and you won't walk out of here.



       

                       

    You see that fuckin' saw,

    we're gonna use it. You got it?



       

                       

    - Get out of here.

    - Thank you.



       

                       

    Throw him in the alley and tell

    the cops he got hit by a car.



       

                       

    [Ace] Within no time,

    everything was set in place.



       

                       

    We got rid

    of the freelance scamsters...



       

                       

    the per was way up,

    the gods were happy.



       

                       

    And I decided

    to complicate my life.



       

                       

    For a guy who likes sure things...



       

                       

    I was about to bet the rest

    of my life on a real long shot.



       

                       

    We're not gettin' any younger.



       

                       

    Don't you think it's time?



       

                       

    Aren't you gettin' tired

    of all this shit?



       

                       

    What, are you trying

    to handicap me?



       

                       

    I'm gonna do you one better.



       

                       

    I'm tryin' to marry you.



       

                       

    You wanna marry me?



       

                       

    I'm serious.



       

                       

    I wanna settle down.

    I want a family.



       

                       

    You got the wrong girl, Sam.



       

                       

    I know I'd be a good father,

    you'd be a good mother.



       

                       

    You don't know me.



       

                       

    You've known me two,

    three months.



       

                       

    I'm    years old.

    I don't want to wait.



       

                       

    I know you well enough

    to know that I really love you.



       

                       

    And I can't think

    of anybody better to be with.



       

                       

    And I don't feel like

    waiting anymore.



       

                       

    You know a lot of happily

    married people, Sam?



       

                       

    'Cause I don't.



       

                       

    Yeah, I know all that.



       

                       

    I care about you, okay.



       

                       

    But I just don't have those kind

    of feelings for you.



       

                       

    I'm sorry.

    I'm not in love with you.



       

                       

    - All right, all right.

    - Understand?



       

                       

    Sam, I'm sorry.



       

                       

    No, l... l...



       

                       

    I mean... I can grow.



       

                       

    As long as there's a mutual respect,

    that kind of thing can grow.



       

                       

    I'm realistic.

    I can accept that.



       

                       

    What is love anyway?



       

                       

    It's a mutual respect.

    It's a devotion.



       

                       

    It's a caring

    from one person to another.



       

                       

    And if we could set up

    some kind of foundation...



       

                       

    based on that mutual respect...



       

                       

    I feel eventually you

    would care enough about me...



       

                       

    that I could live

    with that.



       

                       

    If it doesn't work out,

    doesn't play out...



       

                       

    then what happens to me?



       

                       

    You know I'm doing well now,

    and I'm gonna do even better.



       

                       

    And so whatever happens...



       

                       

    if it doesn't work out

    between us...



       

                       

    I'm gonna make sure you're okay

    for the rest of your life.



       

                       

    And if there are kids,

    especially...



       

                       

    I'll take care of you

    better than you'd ever imagine.



       

                       

    What are you pitching me?



       

                       

    Just what I said,

    you'll be set up...



       

                       

    for the rest of your life,

    that I can promise you.



       

                       

    Want to take a chance?



       

                       

    [Applause]



       

                       

    [Ace] When I married Ginger,

    I knew all the stories.



       

                       

    But I didn't give a fuck.

    I'm Sam Rothstein, I said.



       

                       

    I can change her.



       

                       

    [Nicky]

    It was typical Ace.



       

                       

    He invited the biggest people

    in town and he knew they'd show.



       

                       

    Because he knew they all wanted

    somethin' from him.



       

                       

    With Ace, nobody ever got

    a free ride, even Ginger.



       

                       

    With her, he still

    covered his bets.



       

                       

    They had to have the baby

    before they could get married.



       

                       

    He even made Jenny and me

    watch Amy for a few days...



       

                       

    when they went

    on their honeymoon.



       

                       

    But I didn't mind,

    we loved the kid.



       

                       

    [Lester]

    Can you feel my eyes on you?



       

                       

    Can you feel me

    look into your heart?



       

                       

    Can you feel me

    in the pit of your stomach?



       

                       

    Can you feel me in you?



       

                       

    In your heart?



       

                       

    Don't make me come there.



       

                       

    Answer me.



       

                       

    [Ginger Crying]

    I love you.



       

                       

    But, baby, do you know

    that I love you too?



       

                       

    - No, Lester.

    - Do you know that?



       

                       

    This is the best thing I can do

    for my life right now.



       

                       

    [Lester] That's right.

    So it's going to be okay.



       

                       

    Promise?



       

                       

    I wish you all the luck

    in the world.



       

                       

    You do?



       

                       

    Yeah, I do. It's the best thing

    you can do right now.



       

                       

    I mean this.



       

                       

    You have real security.



       

                       

    Sweetheart, you're gonna be

    situated just right, in Vegas.



       

                       

    Come on, this is great for us.



       

                       

    I'm always gonna be here for you.



       

                       

    I ain't going no place.



       

                       

    I'm lookin' at you right now.



       

                       

    I'm seein' you for the very first time,

    right this minute.



       

                       

    I can feel my heart click.



       

                       

    I see you    years old.



       

                       

    I see you the first second

    I ever saw you.



       

                       

    I see you

    long-legged little colt...



       

                       

    stupid braces on your teeth.



       

                       

    - Okay, then.

    - Every time I ever see you,

    that's what I see.



       

                       

    Talk to you later.



       

                       

    Bye.



       

                       

    You all right?



       

                       

    Yeah.



       

                       

    Why are you crying?



       

                       

    I'm not crying.

    [Sniffles]



       

                       

    Maybe you shouldn't

    drink so much.



       

                       

    I'm okay, I just...



       

                       

    [Sniffles]



       

                       

    You just have to understand.



       

                       

    I've been with Lester

    since I was a kid.



       

                       

    I just wanted to say good-bye.



       

                       

    I just... I don't...



       

                       

    I think I have

    a right to do that.



       

                       

    Okay?



       

                       

    It's all right.



       

                       

    That part of your life

    is over with.



       

                       

    - Right?

    - Yeah.



       

                       

    You're with me now.



       

                       

    - Yeah.

    - Right?



       

                       

    Uh-huh.



       

                       

    - You're sure?

    - Yeah.



       

                       

    Yeah.



       

                       

    - Let's go. Let's go back in.

    - Okay.



       

                       

    Oh!



       

                       

    [Ginger]

    Tsk. It's great.



       

                       

    It's great.



       

                       

    [Ginger Shrieks]



       

                       

    It's all my stuff.

    Oh, my God.



       

                       

    You brought all my stuff!



       

                       

    I can't...



       

                       

    Try it on, it's yours.



       

                       

    You're kidding.



       

                       

    Oh, my God.

    What is it?



       

                       

    It's chinchilla.



       

                       

    Oh, it's so soft.



       

                       

    Nice, isn't it?



       

                       

    No one's ever been

    so nice to me.



       

                       

    [Gasps]



       

                       

    Oh!



       

                       

    Oh, my God!



       

                       

    So, do you think

    it's too much...



       

                       

    if I wear these

    all on the same day?



       

                       

    You do whatever

    you want.



       

                       

    Do I keep my promises or

    do I keep my promises?



       

                       

    So wonderful. The jewelry's

    not so bad either.



       

                       

    We shouldn't keep this in the house.

    We gotta put it in the bank.



       

                       

    Come on, can I keep this one

    in the house?



       

                       

    Pay attention to me.



       

                       

    - What I'm gonna tell you

    is very important.

    - Okay.



       

                       

    All this stuff

    doesn't mean anything.



       

                       

    Money, this doesn't mean

    anything without trust.



       

                       

    I have to be able

    to trust you with my life.



       

                       

    [Ace] With over a million

    in cash and jewels...



       

                       

    tucked in a bank in Vegas, only

    for Ginger, she was secure and happy.



       

                       

    She loved that shit.



       

                       

    But a guy in my line of work has

    to have a lot of payoff cash around.



       

                       

    Crooked cops and kidnappers,

    they don't take checks.



       

                       

    Need any help with that,

    Mr. Collins?



       

                       

    So I put two million in cash

    in a Los Angeles bank...



       

                       

    under the name

    of Mr. and Mrs. Tom Collins.



       

                       

    This was strictly my shakedown

    and kidnapping money.



       

                       

    [Ginger Laughs]



       

                       

    And since I'd either be in jail

    or locked in a closet...



       

                       

    when I needed the money

    the most...



       

                       

    I gave Ginger the only key to the cash

    that could get me back alive.



       

                       

    - I'll take you there

    - I'm callin', callin'



       

                       

    Callin' for mercy



       

                       

    - I'll take you there

    - Mercy, mercy



       

                       

    I'll take you there



       

                       

    This is a signature card.



       

                       

    So once she signs those papers,

    she'll be the only person...



       

                       

    to have total access to the box,

    no one else, including myself?



       

                       

    That's right.

    That's the way you wanted it.



       

                       

    [Banker]

    Sam, let me ask you a question.



       

                       

    You must really trust your wife.



       

                       

    Yeah, sure I do. Why?



       

                       

    It's good.

    It's just unusual.



       

                       

    Tell you the truth,

    so many of my clients don't.



       

                       

    - Let me take you there

    - I'll take you there



       

                       

    - Ain't no smilin' faces

    - I'll take you there



       

                       

    Never will I know happiness



       

                       

    [Ace] With Ginger and the money

    in place, I felt covered.



       

                       

    And to play it safe,

    I switched job titles again...



       

                       

    and made myself

    Food and Beverage Director.



       

                       

    This way nobody would bother me

    about a license.



       

                       

    I mean Vegas was

    like a dream for me.



       

                       

    Trouble was, Nicky was dreaming

    his own kind of Vegas.



       

                       

    [Nicky] I put money out on the street

    chargin' three points a week.



       

                       

    - Don't make us come lookin' for you.

    - Juice to the fuckin' dealers.



       

                       

    You won't have to look

    for me.



       

                       

    I appreciate it.

    Thanks, Nicky.



       

                       

    They were degenerate gamblers,

    coke freaks.



       

                       

    In no time I had half the dealers

    in the Tangiers in my pocket.



       

                       

    Then, I started bustin' out

    high-stakes poker players.



       

                       

    [Ace]

    It was so obvious.



       

                       

    - All of Nicky's half-assed

    mechanics were signal-happy.

    - I'm gonna open for    .



       

                       

    [Ace]

    Signaling back and forth.



       

                       

    [Poker Player] Why you cryin'

    with two loaves of bread under your arm?



       

                       

    Nicky thought nobody was watching him.

    But he was wrong.



       

                       

    And I didn't want

    any of those agents near my place.



       

                       

    - Four aces.

    - I can't believe this.



       

                       

    [Poker Player] If I didn't have

    bad luck, I wouldn't have any luck.



       

                       

    I wished to God Nicky and

    his whole crew would just get lost.



       

                       

    What am I gonna do?

    Go back home and start a war?



       

                       

    Nicky's a made guy and I'm not.

    I can't do that.



       

                       

    Be careful. Gaming agents

    are all over the place.



       

                       

    So I'm lucky. I'm not allowed

    to get lucky in this place?



       

                       

    You've been lucky all week.

    They're looking to nail you.



       

                       

    [Nicky] Ace was so fuckin' worried

    about his casino...



       

                       

    he forgot what we were doin'

    out here in the first place.



       

                       

    A million times I wanted to yell

    in his fuckin' ear...



       

                       

    "This is Las Vegas.



       

                       

    We're supposed to be

    out here robbin"'...



       

                       

    you dumb fuckin' hebe.



       

                       

    I don't give a shit

    who he's connected to.



       

                       

    Tell him to take

    his fuckin' feet off the table.



       

                       

    What's he think this is,

    a goddamned sawdust joint?



       

                       

    Sir, would you mind

    taking your feet off the table?



       

                       

    Yeah, I would mind.

    I'm having a bad night.



       

                       

    Fuckin' asshole won't budge.



       

                       

    Call security.



       

                       

    - How are you?

    - Good. How are you?



       

                       

    Wanna do me a favor? Take your feet off

    the table and put your shoes back on.



       

                       

    Fuck you!



       

                       

    I want you to exit this guy

    off the premises...



       

                       

    and use his head

    to open the fucking door.



       

                       

    Sir, you're gonna have to leave.

    Wanna come with us outside?



       

                       

    Bullshit. I ain't goin'

    anywhere with you.



       

                       

    - Bullshit. You're outta here.

    - Fuck you!



       

                       

    You know who you're

    fucking with? Do you?



       

                       

    You fucking faggot! Do you know

    who you're fucking with?



       

                       

    Leave me alone!

    [Grunting]



       

                       

    - Come on!

    - You guys are killing me!



       

                       

    Sure enough, an hour later,

    I get the call.



       

                       

    Ace, what happened over there?

    Did you know that guy was with me?



       

                       

    No, I didn't know that.

    But you know what he did?



       

                       

    I walked over to him politely,

    and he tells me to fuck myself.



       

                       

    - Then he called me a faggot.

    - What?



       

                       

    - I threw that cocksucker out.

    - Hey, come here.



       

                       

    You called my friend a faggot?

    You tell him to fuck himself?



       

                       

    - Is that what you did?

    Tell him to go fuck himself?

    - [Grunting]



       

                       

    [Grunting Continues]

    Come here. Come here.



       

                       

    You go over there.

    You apologize.



       

                       

    You better hope

    he lets you back in.



       

                       

    If you get outta line again,

    I'll smash your head so hard...



       

                       

    you won't be able

    to get that cowboy hat on.



       

                       

    Fuckin' hick.

    Sammy, listen.



       

                       

    This guy obviously doesn't know

    who he was talking to.



       

                       

    He doesn't know that

    we're dear friends.



       

                       

    I mean, he's already

    very sorry.



       

                       

    But if you could do me a favor

    and let him back in...



       

                       

    I swear he'll never

    get out of line again.



       

                       

    If he does it again,

    he's out for good.



       

                       

    I don't care what it is,

    I'll never let him in the place again.



       

                       

    I'm sorry about this, really.



       

                       

    All right, Ace?

    Thanks, pal.



       

                       

    You took your boots off?

    You put your feet on the table?



       

                       

    You shit-kickin',

    stinky-horse-manure-smellin'

    motherfucker, you!



       

                       

    You fuck me up over there,

    I'll stick you in the desert.



       

                       

    - Go over and apologize.

    - Nicky, I'm sorry.



       

                       

    [Roaring]



       

                       

    You're dear to me

    Yes, sirree



       

                       

    [Nicky] You know,

    Ace could be a very touchy guy.



       

                       

    Especially when

    he got bigger in town.



       

                       

    Like when he hired

    that Jonathan and David

    and their tigers away from the Palace...



       

                       

    by building them a new stage

    and giving them a Rolls-Royce.



       

                       

    But I'll tell you, he knew

    how to bring in the crowds.



       

                       

    He knew all

    the fuckin' angles.



       

                       

    He brought over the whole

    "Femme Fatale" show from Paris...



       

                       

    but he forgot how lazy them

    European dancing broads can get.



       

                       

    He had to weigh 'em in

    once a week to make sure

    they didn't blow up like balloons.



       

                       

    She's still eight pounds over.



       

                       

    - What's the reason for this?

    - Mr. Rothstein, sir.



       

                       

    Never mind the "sir."

    Why is she eight pounds over?



       

                       

    I'm trying to use respect.



       

                       

    Mr. Rothstein is good enough for you.



       

                       

    Well, sometimes when you put

    that pressure point on them...



       

                       

    All you do is give me answers.

    Just give me the right answer.



       

                       

    I guess she's frightened. If she doesn't

    lose weight she may get fired.



       

                       

    That's right, she will get fired.

    Send her back to Paris...



       

                       

    - It's been our policy...

    - Just stop everything!



       

                       

    - This woman's an institution.

    - That's the problem. She's lazy.



       

                       

    [Nicky] Hey,

    I gotta give the guy credit.



       

                       

    I mean, he does

    the most obvious thing.



       

                       

    This is the only town in the country

    where a bookie joint is legit.



       

                       

    So why not take advantage, right?



       

                       

    So, he took bookie joints

    off the street...



       

                       

    and then opened them up

    inside the casino.



       

                       

    Within a few years

    by doing all of this...



       

                       

    he had every casino on the strip

    trying to copy off of him.



       

                       

    [Ace]

    Between my innovations...



       

                       

    Look like they're taking

    some cat to jail



       

                       

    and Nicky's dedication

    to his job...



       

                       

    Steamboats are comin' and

    they're splashing and goin'



       

                       

    I soon had the best

    operation on the strip.



       

                       

    Moon is shinin'

    on friends below



       

                       

    You gotta watch yourself.

    There's a lot of heat on you already.



       

                       

    Why?

    Somebody's complainin'?



       

                       

    I'm hearing things

    from security.



       

                       

    The sheriff's lookin'

    to put you in the Black Book.



       

                       

    That Black Book

    is a bunch of bullshit.



       

                       

    They got two names

    from the whole country...



       

                       

    and one of 'em

    is still Al Capone.



       

                       

    If they put you in that book,

    you're gonna be in trouble.



       

                       

    You will not be able

    to walk into a casino.



       

                       

    I'm trying to make a living,

    that's all.



       

                       

    I'm just tellin' you,

    don't say I didn't warn you.



       

                       

    All right.



       

                       

    [Man] Mrs. Rothstein

    straight ahead. Very nice.



       

                       

    Thank you.



       

                       

    [Chattering]



       

                       

    [Man] For his hard work

    and dedication...



       

                       

    and the new life blood

    he has instilled in Las Vegas...



       

                       

    Sam has established himself

    as an indispensable member...



       

                       

    of the gaming community.



       

                       

    As the head of the

    Tangiers Gaming Corporation...



       

                       

    it's my pleasure

    to welcome Sam Rothstein...



        

                       

    to the Vegas Valley

    Country Club.



        

                       

    [Applause]



        

                       

    [Ace] Back home, they would've put me

    in jail for what I'm doing.



        

                       

    But out here,

    they're giving me awards.



        

                       

    It is with great pleasure that I accept

    this certificate of appreciation...



        

                       

    for charitable donations

    to greater Las Vegas.



        

                       

    Congratulations, sweetheart.



        

                       

    Sam raised more than

    we've ever raised before.



        

                       

    But my greatest pleasure was watching

    my wife, Ginger, work the room.



        

                       

    - [Chattering]

    - They all loved her.

    How could you not love her?



        

                       

    She could be the most

    charming woman you ever saw.



        

                       

    People loved

    to be around her.



        

                       

    You've got to bring Amy

    to Sasha's birthday party.



        

                       

    We'd love to have you there.



        

                       

    - Yes, okay.

    - Great.



        

                       

    She made everybody feel good.



        

                       

    That's Stella by starlight



        

                       

    Congratulations, Sam.



        

                       

    Oh, thanks.



        

                       

    - Hello, Mrs. Rothstein. How are you?

    - Hi.



        

                       

    You're one of the most

    gorgeous women I've ever seen.



        

                       

    You're a lucky man,

    Mr. Rothstein.



        

                       

    Thank you.

    Thanks for that compliment.



        

                       

    He was a young kid

    from the casino.



        

                       

    Nice kid.

    Bright boy.



        

                       

    What balls on this fuckin' kid!

    The next day I fired him.



        

                       

    Ginger had that effect on people.

    I think she even encouraged them.



        

                       

    Do you wanna see this one?

    Ahhhh!



        

                       

    Daddy gave me all this jewelry

    because he loves me so much.



        

                       

    - But as much as they loved her...

    - Oh, fabulous!



        

                       

    they didn't know

    what really moved her.



        

                       

    Look at this. Look at this.

    Daddy gave me this...



        

                       

    And with Ginger happy, I was able

    to concentrate on what I knew best.



        

                       

    Loose machines are

    right back over there.



        

                       

    What are they doin' back there?

    You can't even see 'em there.



        

                       

    - Okay, I'll...

    - What about the progressives

    or the high jackpots?



        

                       

    - Well...

    - These are our best machines.

    They bring all the action.



        

                       

    - No wonder the drop is off.

    - Yeah, okay.



        

                       

    - The action is in the front.

    Bring 'em up front.

    - All right, I will.



        

                       

    Listen to me very carefully. There are

    three ways of doing things around here:



        

                       

    the right way, the wrong way

    and the way that I do it.



        

                       

    - You understand?

    - I do understand that.

    I'll get right on it.



        

                       

    - And thank you.

    - Don't thank me. Just do it.



        

                       

    You're the slots manager.

    I shouldn't have to tell you this.



        

                       

    Dang, you are right,

    Mr. Rothstein. I am so sorry.



        

                       

    [Ace] So I ended up working...

    what,   -hour days.



        

                       

    Ginger was the one who wound up

    enjoying the best of Vegas.



        

                       

    Come with me, please.

    I have a better table for you.



        

                       

    What did you say to that

    fucking jerk, anyway?



        

                       

    I told him I was

    Mrs. Sam Rothstein.



        

                       

    [Chuckles] Well, you might

    as well get something out of it.



        

                       

    [Ace]

    Well, it wasn't long...



        

                       

    before what I was afraid

    was gonna happen happened.



        

                       

    Nicky managed to get himself banned

    from every casino in Las Vegas.



        

                       

    And from then on,

    I couldn't be seen talking

    to him anywhere in Vegas or near it.



        

                       

    What the fuck is that

    supposed to mean?



        

                       

    "He will be ejected from

    any casino in Las Vegas.



        

                       

    And the casinos can be fined

    as much as $      ...



        

                       

    every time he shows up."



        

                       

    - You believe this shit?

    - Yeah, I believe it. You got banned.



        

                       

    "Because of notorious

    and unsavory reputation..."



        

                       

    Motherfucker!



        

                       

    Is there any way

    around this?



        

                       

    No, there's no way.



        

                       

    Let's say, for instance...



        

                       

    I wanna go in a restaurant,

    which happens to be in the casino...



        

                       

    to get one of those

    sandwiches I like?



        

                       

    Forget it. You can't even

    set foot in the parking lot.



        

                       

    That's how serious it is.



        

                       

    In other words,

    I'm fucked?



        

                       

    In so many words, yes.



        

                       

    It just didn't sink into his head

    about the black book and what it meant.



        

                       

    Not being able to go

    into a casino is one thing...



        

                       

    but being in this book

    etched your name into the brains

    of every cop and FBI agent.



        

                       

    I mean, you're listed in there

    with Al Capone. But Nicky didn't care.



        

                       

    I gotta do something.

    They ain't gettin' rid of me.



        

                       

    They're not gettin' rid of me.

    I'm stayin' here.



        

                       

    Fuck 'em. Fuck 'em.



        

                       

    [Nicky]

    So, once they pulled that shit...



        

                       

    I started doin' my own things

    nobody ever thought of doin'.



        

                       

    To keep an eye on things,

    I brought in my kid brother,

    Dominick, and some desperados...



        

                       

    and started knockin' over

    high-rollers, casino bosses...



        

                       

    bookmakers...

    anybody right here in town.



        

                       

    I had a good fuckin' crew goin'

    for me, I'll tell you that.



        

                       

    I had Sal Fusco,

    a great second-story guy.



        

                       

    Jack Hardy. He worked for a safe company

    before he did a six-year bit.



        

                       

    And then there was Bernie Blue.

    This guy can bypass any alarm for me.



        

                       

    It was like old times.



        

                       

    And I opened up my own jewelry

    store too, the "Gold Rush."



        

                       

    Sometimes I used to go along

    on a heist, just for the fun of it.



        

                       

    But I didn't like the people

    I was rippin' off looking at me...



        

                       

    so I used to turn

    their fuckin' pictures around.



        

                       

    - What's takin' so long?

    - This is a motherfucker!



        

                       

    - It's working.

    - Learn how to open these things

    so you don't have to take 'em.



        

                       

    Some of these stones

    got a lot of niggers in them.



        

                       

    Tell Pepe if he's

    switching stones on us,

    he better take a camel back to Nigeria.



        

                       

    - [Phone Rings]

    - Yeah?



        

                       

    - They're in Penthouse K.

    - Check in alone?



        

                       

    - They checked in alone.

    - Are they out now?



        

                       

    - Yes. Don't worry.

    - All right. Thanks.



        

                       

    [Ace] He had tipsters

    all over town. Bellmen.



        

                       

    - But you got to hurry.

    - Yeah, okay.



        

                       

    - Valet parkers.

    - They're just checking in now.



        

                       

    Okay, I'll tell him.



        

                       

    - Pit bosses.

    - Room      at the Scirocco.



        

                       

    -     . Right.

    - Secretaries.



        

                       

    - Mint condition coins.

    - Mint condition? All right.



        

                       

    And they all got

    a piece of the score.



        

                       

    Car's coming.



        

                       

    [Hard Rock]



        

                       

    They were very careful.



        

                       

    They always bypassed

    the alarms, or else...



        

                       

    if not, they'd drill

    enough holes to knock

    through the walls with a sledgehammer.



        

                       

    Nicky was grabbing

    everything he could.



        

                       

    Nobody out there was expecting

    a guy like him.



        

                       

    For Nicky, Las Vegas

    was the fucking wild west.



        

                       

    I just got a shipment

    of diamonds from Israel.



        

                       

    [Nicky] What the fuck they expect

    from me? I had to earn, didn't I?



        

                       

    You know, this diamond

    has flaws in it.



        

                       

    - There's no flaws.

    - I'm doing this for    years.



        

                       

    You better clean your loupe,

    because there's no flaws.



        

                       

    [Nicky]

    Whenever we got local merch...



        

                       

    we'd usually send it

    to Palm Springs or Arizona, L.A.



        

                       

    I had a couple of sand niggers

    out there. You know, Arabs.



        

                       

    What, are you gonna have

    a fucking meeting here?



        

                       

    I know his language.



        

                       

    Forty thousand dollars.

    The whole package.



        

                       

    Twenty thousand.

    That's my final offer.



        

                       

    He suddenly talks English. Let's talk

    Turkey here. Twenty-five thousand.



        

                       

    [Nicky] I actually turned

    my bedroom into a bank vault...



        

                       

    where I kept

    the choice stuff.



        

                       

    I couldn't leave it

    at the Gold Rush...



        

                       

    in case we got raided

    by the cops...



        

                       

    or if my crew got cute.



        

                       

    I had the only key.

    Jennifer didn't give a fuck.



        

                       

    She used to fall asleep

    on the couch watching TV.



        

                       

    This stuff was all mine.

    I didn't send any of this back home.



        

                       

    Actually I couldn't, because I wasn't

    even supposed to be doin' it.



        

                       

    The bosses were making so much

    fucking money with the casinos...



        

                       

    that they didn't want anybody

    makin' any waves for them.



        

                       

    You gave all the guys

    in your crew a piece of that?



        

                       

    - I took care of everyone.

    - Yeah?



        

                       

    That's why there was

    no real organized street stuff

    in Vegas before I came here.



        

                       

    But how much cash

    could I bury in my closet?



        

                       

    You have to understand,

    and I'm sure you do...



        

                       

    that in a venture

    of this kind...



        

                       

    you have to be prepared

    to take some kind of loss.



        

                       

    So I put some of the money

    into legitimate deals

    with Charlie Clark, Ace's banker.



        

                       

    You will try to push it through,

    won't you, Mr. Clark?



        

                       

    - Yes.

    - I'm giving you       cash.



        

                       

    Then I put some more money into

    legitimate places, like my restaurant.



        

                       

    - Is that the last one?

    - Yeah.



        

                       

    I had my kid brother,

    Dominick, run it for me.



        

                       

    Fuckers.



        

                       

    - Here you go, guys.

    - All right.



        

                       

    - Thanks a lot.

    - Yeah. Enjoy. Have a good time.



        

                       

    Choke on it, motherfucker.



        

                       

    - Hey, Dom.

    - How ya doin'?



        

                       

    [Ace] Yeah, Nicky loved restaurants.

    He was a real restaurant buff.



        

                       

    And over the years,

    he always made money with it.



        

                       

    In Vegas, he had the Leaning Tower.

    It was a very popular spot.



        

                       

    He had politicians, showgirls and movie

    stars hanging out all over the place.



        

                       

    That show over at the Flamingo

    gets better and better.



        

                       

    By the way, Sammy said, whenever

    you have a minute, give him a call.



        

                       

    - Made a messenger out of you too, huh?

    - Anything for a buck.



        

                       

    - He does it to everybody.

    Enjoy your dinner.

    - Thanks.



        

                       

    [Ace]

    But I gotta tell you, the thing Nicky

    liked most was the showgirls, naturally.



        

                       

    I mean, to them,

    Nicky was the movie star.



        

                       

    - You walk past me?

    - Hey, this is Shelly.



        

                       

    - Hey, Shelly. How are you?

    - Hi.



        

                       

    - And this is Stacy.

    - Stacy.



        

                       

    - This is Nick. Wanna have dinner?

    - Pleasure.



        

                       

    Let's check the kitchen first.

    Excuse us one second.



        

                       

    Come on, I'll show you.

    I fly stuff in fresh every day.



        

                       

    I get bread from back home.

    I get fish from California.



        

                       

    And you can always tell a great kitchen

    like ours because of the milk-fed veal.



        

                       

    That's the secret.

    See, milk-fed veal is pure white.



        

                       

    Out here they got that pink veal.

    Slide over, honey.



        

                       

    Now, pink veal, you can pound

    that shit for two days.



        

                       

    It'll never, ever get tender.

    You know what I mean?



        

                       

    I left here with the money.

    Got muscled on the street.



        

                       

    A couple guys, I owe them.

    So I gave them the money.



        

                       

    - That's what I did.

    - Yeah?



        

                       

    - Yeah.

    - You call yourself a man?



        

                       

    You know you're a lyin' lowlife,

    motherfuckin' gamblin' degenerate prick?



        

                       

    You know that's what you are?

    Two small kids at home.



        

                       

    I gave you money to pay

    the fuckin' rent...



        

                       

    and buy groceries,

    put the heat on.



        

                       

    Your wife called Frankie and

    told him the fuckin' heat's off.



        

                       

    And you didn't gamble

    that fuckin' money?



        

                       

    - No? You didn't?

    - I didn't...



        

                       

    Don't fuck with me, Al!

    Don't make a fuck outta me.



        

                       

    You wanna embarrass me and make

    a fool outta me? You didn't gamble?



        

                       

    Tell me you gambled

    the fuckin' money...



        

                       

    I'll give you the fuckin' money

    to put the fuckin' heat on!



        

                       

    Did you gamble? Huh?



        

                       

    Fuckin' degenerate.



        

                       

    Fuckin' kids at home.



        

                       

    Here. Get the fuck outta here.



        

                       

    - Thanks, Nick.

    - Yeah, thanks.



        

                       

    Let me find out you fucked up.

    I'll leave you where I find you.



        

                       

    How many of these

    you gonna eat?



        

                       

    - Two.

    - Two?



        

                       

    [Ace] But around  :   in the morning,

    when he finished his day...



        

                       

    no matter where he was

    or what he was doing...



        

                       

    he always went home to make breakfast

    for his son, Nicky boy.



        

                       

    I know you like this.

    A little butter, right?



        

                       

    - Not a lot. You know why, right?

    - Yeah.



        

                       

    - Why?

    - 'Cause it clogs up your heart.



        

                       

    What a smart kid you are.

    Okay, eat.



        

                       

    [Nicky] Every couple of weeks,

    I used to send Marino...



        

                       

    back to the bosses

    with a piece of what I made.



        

                       

    Not a bit piece,

    but what did they know?



        

                       

    They were      miles away, and I don't

    know anybody who can see that far.



        

                       

    Their drop was

    a truck stop garage...



        

                       

    where Remo and the guys used

    to hang out and count their millions.



        

                       

    - Remo.

    - Hey, Frankie.



        

                       

    The cops knew,

    but they didn't give a fuck.



        

                       

    Nicky sends

    his warmest regards.



        

                       

    I knew how

    to keep the bosses happy.



        

                       

    Whenever they gave me

    little jobs to do...



        

                       

    I would carry things out

    to a "t."



        

                       

    Like the time Tony Dogs,

    who's supposed to be

    the new maniac tough guy in town...



        

                       

    shot up one of Remo's bars.



        

                       

    Here's a fuckin' guy

    kills two of Remo's guys...



        

                       

    and a poor fuckin' waitress who was just

    workin' on her night off, of all things.



        

                       

    I mean, this guy's just beggin'

    to be made an example of.



        

                       

    Frankie, I want the names

    of all the other people he had with him.



        

                       

    And I don't care what you have

    to do to 'em to get 'em, understand?



        

                       

    - I'll take care of it, Remo.

    - And mow 'em down.



        

                       

    [Nicky] To be truthful with you,

    I had to admire this guy.



        

                       

    He was one of the toughest

    Irishmen I ever met.



        

                       

    - [Chattering]

    - This son of a bitch was tough.



        

                       

    For two days and two fuckin' nights

    we beat the shit outta this guy.



        

                       

    We even stuck ice picks

    in his balls.



        

                       

    - Better give me a name soon,

    or I'm gonna give him yours, Frank.

    - Thanks a lot.



        

                       

    - But he never talked.

    - I know you would've ratted by now.



        

                       

    In the end, I had to put

    his fuckin' head in a vise.



        

                       

    Dogs, Dogs,

    can you hear me, Dogs?



        

                       

    Listen to me, Anthony.

    I got your head in a vise.



        

                       

    I'll squash your fuckin' head like a

    grapefruit if you don't give me a name.



        

                       

    Don't make me have to do this.

    Please. Come on!



        

                       

    Don't make me be a bad guy.

    Come on.



        

                       

    [Straining]

    Fuck you!



        

                       

    This motherfucker. You believe this?

    Two fuckin' days and nights.



        

                       

    Fuck me? Fuck me?

    You motherfucker!



        

                       

    Fuck my mother?

    Is that what you're tellin' me?



        

                       

    - [Skull Crunching]

    - You motherfucker, you! Huh?



        

                       

    - Oh, God!

    - Give me the fuckin' name!



        

                       

    [Straining]

    Charlie M.



        

                       

    - Charlie M.?

    - Charlie M.



        

                       

    You make me pop your

    fuckin' eye outta your head...



        

                       

    to protect that piece of shit,

    Charlie M.?



        

                       

    You dumb motherfucker!



        

                       

    Kill me, you fuck!

    Kill me!



        

                       

    You motherfucker, you!



        

                       

    Frankie, do him

    a fuckin' favor.



        

                       

    [Ace] The word got around

    that finally...



        

                       

    there was a real

    gangster in town.



        

                       

    Nicky was the new boss

    of Las Vegas.



        

                       

    Charlie M.



        

                       

    [Bells Ringing]



        

                       

    Four reels, sevens,

    across three $      jackpots.



        

                       

    Do you have any idea

    what the odds are?



        

                       

    It's gotta be

    in the millions, maybe more.



        

                       

    Three fuckin' jackpots in    minutes!

    Why didn't you call me?



        

                       

    It happened so quick. Three guys won.

    I didn't have a chance.



        

                       

    - You didn't see the scam?

    - There's no way to determine that.



        

                       

    Yes, there is.

    They won!



        

                       

    It's a casino.

    People gotta win sometimes.



        

                       

    Ward, you're pissing me off.

    Now you're insulting my intelligence.



        

                       

    You know goddamn well somebody had

    to get into those machines

    and set those fuckin' reels.



        

                       

    The probability on one machine

    is a million and a half to one.



        

                       

    On three machines in a row,

    it's in the billions.



        

                       

    What's the matter with you?



        

                       

    Didn't you see you were being set up

    on the second win?



        

                       

    I think you're overreacting.



        

                       

    Listen, you fuckin' yokel. I've been

    carrying your ass ever since I got here.



        

                       

    - Get your ass outta here.

    - You're firing me?



        

                       

    I'm firing you.

    No, I'm not firing...



        

                       

    - You might regret this.

    - I'll regret it if I keep you.



        

                       

    This is not the way

    to treat people.



        

                       

    If you didn't know,

    you're too fuckin' dumb.



        

                       

    If you did know,

    you were in on it.



        

                       

    Either way, you're out.

    Get out. Come on, let's go.



        

                       

    The guy's history

    as far as I'm concerned.



        

                       

    But you can't fire him. His

    brother-in-law is County Commissioner.



        

                       

    Everybody with cowboy boots is

    a fuckin' county commissioner

    or related to a commissioner.



        

                       

    This is his state.

    His uncle's chief judge.



        

                       

    His brother-in-law runs

    the county commission.



        

                       

    You're in the finances,

    you're upstairs.



        

                       

    But you are not on the floor.

    You don't see what's going on.



        

                       

    I've got thousands of players.

    I've got     dealers.



        

                       

    They're all looking

    to rob me blind    hours a day.



        

                       

    I have to let them know I'm watching

    all the details all the time.



        

                       

    There is not one single thing

    I will not catch.



        

                       

    - Look at yours. Look at that.

    - Huh?



        

                       

    Look at this.

    There's nothing.



        

                       

    Look how many

    blueberries your muffin has.



        

                       

    What are you talking about?



        

                       

    If you don't do it yourself,

    it never gets done.



        

                       

    - Where are you going?

    - How long can this go on



        

                       

    From now on, I want you to put an equal

    amount of blueberries in each muffin.



        

                       

    An equal amount of blueberries

    in each muffin.



        

                       

    Do you know how long

    that's going to take?



        

                       

    I don't care how long it takes.

    Put an equal amount in each muffin.



        

                       

    Just a little.

    That a girl.



        

                       

    Oh, boy, look.

    You wanna go to Mommy?



        

                       

    Wanna come to Mommy?

    It's all right, sweetheart.



        

                       

    I need to talk to you.

    I need some money.



        

                       

    - What do you need?

    - Got her?



        

                       

    Well, I need a lot.

    I need more than usual.



        

                       

    Why don't you take it

    out of your account?



        

                       

    I would, you know, Sam,

    it's just that...



        

                       

    Well, I need more than that.

    I need $     .



        

                       

    Twenty-five thousand?

    For yourself?



        

                       

    - Yeah.

    - Why do you need that much?



        

                       

    What's the difference?

    I just need it.



        

                       

    Well, I gotta ask you.

    That's a lot of money.



        

                       

    You're not asking

    for a box of popcorn.



        

                       

    We don't have to turn this

    into a big deal.



        

                       

    Okay? We don't have

    to have a fight.



        

                       

    It's important to me.

    Just something I wanted to do.



        

                       

    Who's fighting?

    I mean, tell me what it's for.



        

                       

    Why can't you tell me

    what it's for? Huh?



        

                       

    Well, you know what?

    Now I want you to tell me.



        

                       

    My wife comes to me and asks me

    for      . What do you want, a coat?



        

                       

    - No.

    - If you want a coat, you got it.



        

                       

    It's not the money.

    It's just, why do you want it?

    Am I not entitled to ask that?



        

                       

    Sam, I've been independent

    my whole life. I never had

    to ask anybody for anything.



        

                       

    - Now you're making me beg.

    - What are you talking about?



        

                       

    And you're embarrassing me.

    Why do you want to make me feel so bad?



        

                       

    You're asking me for      .

    I'm not out to make you feel bad.



        

                       

    I want to just

    be able to trust you.



        

                       

    You know,

    it's about trust.



        

                       

    I have to be able

    to trust you with my life.



        

                       

    Do you understand?



        

                       

    Can I trust you?



        

                       

    Can I trust you?



        

                       

    Can I trust you?

    Answer me, can I trust you?



        

                       

    You can trust me.



        

                       

    Good. So then you could tell me

    what the money is for.



        

                       

    You've got to



        

                       

    Give a little



        

                       

    Take a little



        

                       

    And let your poor heart



        

                       

    Break a little



        

                       

    Yeah, she's leaving the bank now.



        

                       

    All right,

    I'm gonna follow her.



        

                       

    [Man Laughing]

    What is that?



        

                       

    I know that look.

    What does that look mean?



        

                       

    It means I got the money.



        

                       

    You've got to



        

                       

    - Give a little

    - [Singer] Yes,

    you're way up on top now.



        

                       

    Take a little



        

                       

    How are you doin', Les?

    It's Lester, right?



        

                       

    Sam.



        

                       

    From my recollection,

    aren't you the card shark...



        

                       

    the golf hustler,

    the pimp from Beverly Hills?



        

                       

    If I'm wrong,

    please correct me.



        

                       

    'Cause I never knew you

    to be a heist man.



        

                       

    But if you are,

    you know what?



        

                       

    Here, take mine too.



        

                       

    Go ahead, take it.

    'Cause you already have hers.



        

                       

    She's my wife.

    Look at me.



        

                       

    You did know that, didn't you?

    You knew that she's my wife?



        

                       

    - Hey, look at me.

    - Yeah, I know that.



        

                       

    You know, yeah?



        

                       

    But if you ever

    come back again, ever...



        

                       

    to take her money,

    next time bring a pistol.



        

                       

    That way

    you got a chance.



        

                       

    Be a man.

    Don't be a fucking pimp.



        

                       

    Now, you wanna do me a favor?

    Get outta here.



        

                       

    I wanna be alone with my wife.

    Get up and get outta here.



        

                       

    - [Singer] And you want to be free.

    - Take a little



        

                       

    [Singer] Why, you feel

    that you are too good...



        

                       

    much too good

    for a nobody like me.



        

                       

    - Fuckin' piece of shit.

    - That's fuckin' bullshit.



        

                       

    - That's the story

    - Well, darling, I guess it's best...



        

                       

    - That's the glory of love

    - that we should part.



        

                       

    Remember when you called him

    that night and said good-bye?



        

                       

    He didn't say, "Don't get married.

    I'll be right down."



        

                       

    - He didn't say that to you, did he?

    - No, he didn't.



        

                       

    No. Instead, what did he say?



        

                       

    "Fuck him. Take him

    for everything he's got."



        

                       

    Come here.

    I want to show you something.



        

                       

    - That's the story

    - The second letter came right

    after I gave you your start.



        

                       

    - [Grunting, Shouting]

    - No! No! No!



        

                       

    [Screaming]

    No! Make 'em stop it!



        

                       

    - [Groaning]

    - No! No!



        

                       

    It's not his fault!

    It's my fault!



        

                       

    [Shouting Continues]



        

                       

    [Screaming]

    No!



        

                       

    - Fuck! Fuck!

    - Piece of shit.



        

                       

    [Sobbing Continues]



        

                       

    [Ace] You did it to yourself,

    you chickenshit cocksucker.



        

                       

    He's such a prick!



        

                       

    He had some guy

    from the hotel beat him up.



        

                       

    He didn't want

    to do it himself.



        

                       

    Oh, no, he didn't want

    to get his own hands dirty.



        

                       

    So why did he

    have to do that, huh?



        

                       

    Tell me.



        

                       

    - I know it wasn't a nice thing to do...

    - No shit.



        

                       

    You gotta understand it. He doesn't know

    if this guy is shaking you down...



        

                       

    No. No. I told him all about this guy

    before we ever got married.



        

                       

    - This is no fucking surprise.

    - Oh, you did? I didn't know that.



        

                       

    He's just a friend of mine

    I was trying to help. So what?



        

                       

    You know, the first time

    I ever saw you guys together...



        

                       

    I never saw him so happy.



        

                       

    I mean, I know he's

    a crazy Jew fuck and everything...



        

                       

    but I never seen him act

    like that with anybody else.



        

                       

    I think he's crazy about you.

    I mean, he really loves you.



        

                       

    Come on. I went into this

    with my eyes open, you know.



        

                       

    I knew the bottom

    could drop out at any time.



        

                       

    You don't think I'm gonna

    go into a situation like this...



        

                       

    if I don't think I'm gonna

    get covered on my back end.



        

                       

    - Sure, I can see that.

    - Right?



        

                       

    So I put aside some jewelry for me.

    A lot of jewelry.



        

                       

    You mean like a lot

    of expensive jewelry? About how much?



        

                       

    You want to steal it?



        

                       

    No. I'm just curious.

    I was wondering...



        

                       

    how much he would put

    into a thing like that.



        

                       

    I'm told it's worth

    about a million dollars, maybe more.



        

                       

    Well, there you go.

    What does that tell you?



        

                       

    A million dollars in jewelry.



        

                       

    Does that tell you

    the guy is crazy about you?



        

                       

    I should've never married him.

    He's a Gemini.



        

                       

    Triple Gemini. Duality.



        

                       

    Gemini is the snake, you know.

    You can't trust a snake.



        

                       

    [Sniffling]

    I mean it.



        

                       

    I know what you mean.

    Listen, Ginger.



        

                       

    You know, this is probably not...

    I don't have the answers anyway.



        

                       

    - This is probably not

    what you want to hear...

    - I do.



        

                       

    'cause you're a little upset

    and I understand that.



        

                       

    But I think you should try

    to make the best of it now.

    Go slow. See what happens.



        

                       

    He could've killed him!

    Okay? He could've killed him.

    He didn't have to hit him.



        

                       

    It's not like

    I'm sleeping with the guy.



        

                       

    He makes me sneak around to see

    my own friends. What is that all about?



        

                       

    I guess it's 'cause he loves

    you so much, he's jealous and worried.



        

                       

    He gives a fuck what I do.



        

                       

    Look, I'll try to find out

    what the hell is going on.



        

                       

    - When I see him, I'll talk to him.

    - Okay.



        

                       

    - All right?

    - Yeah.



        

                       

    Thanks. Thanks

    for putting up with me.



        

                       

    Take it easy with this shit.

    This can only make matters worse.



        

                       

    You're a beautiful girl. I've seen a lot

    of girls get shot to hell from this.



        

                       

    You're so nice.



        

                       

    Come on, now. I don't

    wanna see you unhappy.



        

                       

    - These eyes before us

    - Thanks.



        

                       

    Just what the truth is



        

                       

    - Thank you.

    - It's all right.



        

                       

    I can't say anymore



        

                       

    'Cause I love you



        

                       

    Yes, I love you...



        

                       

    [Phone Ringing]



        

                       

    Mr. Rothstein, County Commissioner

    Pat Webb is here to see you.



        

                       

    - Give me a minute.

    - Okay. Just a minute.



        

                       

    Mr. Webb, can I

    get you anything?



        

                       

    Uh, no. No, thank you,

    little lady.



        

                       

    Okay, send him in,

    then call me four minutes after.



        

                       

    - Mr. Rothstein, I'm Pat Webb.

    - How do you do?



        

                       

    - Hey, it is a pleasure.

    - I heard a lot about you.



        

                       

    Oh, thank you, sir.

    Hey, house is doin' well.



        

                       

    Hey, all that money

    is rollin' in.



        

                       

    I appreciate you takin' the time

    to see a poor civil servant.



        

                       

    - Why don't you have a seat, hmm?

    - Oh, thank you, sir.



        

                       

    I come here personally

    to kind of smooth over...



        

                       

    any fracas

    about a certain matter.



        

                       

    See, uh, maybe

    you didn't know it...



        

                       

    but Don Ward is a very

    well-liked man in this town.



        

                       

    He's got lots of friends.

    Nice family and their money

    go back many, many years.



        

                       

    Now friends vote.

    Family and money votes.



        

                       

    That's important

    to me and you.



        

                       

    And if you'll think about

    our little problem along them lines...



        

                       

    and you'll forgive me

    for sayin' it...



        

                       

    maybe he did not

    deserve to be fired.



        

                       

    I'm sorry, but he knew

    about our getting hit...



        

                       

    on three big machines in a row

    and he did nothing about it.



        

                       

    That means, either he was in on it or he

    was too dumb to see what was goin' on.



        

                       

    Either way, I cannot have

    a man like that working here.



        

                       

    Before we point the dirty

    end of the stick at old Don...



        

                       

    we better be sure

    we can prove them charges.



        

                       

    Believe me, if I could prove it,

    he would be under arrest.



        

                       

    Are, uh...

    [Clears throat]



        

                       

    Are we certain that you want

    the Gaming Control Board...



        

                       

    eyeballing your record and

    your gangster pals like Nicky Santoro.



        

                       

    I think you're way out of line

    talking to me like that.



        

                       

    What you're saying is libelous,

    and you're in no position

    to challenge my expertise.



        

                       

    I went way out of my way

    to be very helpful to that kid.



        

                       

    He's weak. He's incompetent.

    He jeopardizes the whole place.



        

                       

    There's not much more

    I can do for him.



        

                       

    You have got me there.

    [Chuckles]



        

                       

    Old Don is as useless

    as tits on a boar.



        

                       

    [Coughs]

    But he is my brother-in-law...



        

                       

    and I would look on it

    as a personal favor...



        

                       

    if you'd think some more

    on hirin' him back.



        

                       

    I can't do that.



        

                       

    I appreciate the fact

    that he's your brother-in-law...



        

                       

    and I do want to help you

    and I like to do favors.



        

                       

    I know who you are,

    but I cannot do that.



        

                       

    Well, could there be

    any position...



        

                       

    farther down the trough?



        

                       

    I'm sorry.

    I can't do anything.



        

                       

    He's too incompetent, and the bottom

    line is, he cannot be trusted.



        

                       

    [Phone Ringing]



        

                       

    Okay. Thanks.



        

                       

    Well... you know,

    that's it. I'm sorry.



        

                       

    Mr. Rothstein, your people

    never will understand...



        

                       

    the way it works out here.



        

                       

    You're all just our guests.



        

                       

    But you act

    like you're at home.



        

                       

    Let me tell you something, partner.

    You ain't home.



        

                       

    But that's where we're gonna send you

    if it harelips the governor.



        

                       

    - Thank you for your time.

    - No problem.



        

                       

    - Sorry.

    - You bet.



        

                       

    What happened to my pills?



        

                       

    Huh?



        

                       

    Isn't it bad enough you're drinking

    too much? You're taking my pills too?



        

                       

    I didn't take your pills.



        

                       

    Look, for my ulcer,

    I take a half a one of these.



        

                       

    And that's when I have

    extreme pain.



        

                       

    I had a three-month supply.

    What did you do with 'em?



        

                       

    [Crying]

    You didn't have to beat him up.



        

                       

    What?



        

                       

    I was just trying to help him.



        

                       

    Like I'm sleeping with the guy.



        

                       

    Yeah, how do I know?



        

                       

    You can't make me stop

    caring about people.



        

                       

    What? What?



        

                       

    I said,

    you can't make me...



        

                       

    stop caring about people.



        

                       

    [Crying Continues]



        

                       

    Listen... Ginger...



        

                       

    I'm trying to make the best

    of everything here, you know?



        

                       

    I mean, you're my wife,

    for Christ's sakes.



        

                       

    I mean, people look up

    to you in this town.



        

                       

    You know what, Ace?

    I don't give a shit!



        

                       

    I'm gettin' out of here.

    I am.



        

                       

    [Crying Continues]



        

                       

    Come over here.

    You gotta get hold of yourself.



        

                       

    - Okay. Okay.

    - If not for me, at least for Amy.



        

                       

    Understand? Your drinking's

    gettin' way out of hand.



        

                       

    I'm gonna get you into a program.

    They got plenty of good ones.



        

                       

    - I don't need one.

    - Yes, you do. It's very discreet.



        

                       

    There's no names

    in the papers.



        

                       

    That's all you care about.

    You don't care about me.



        

                       

    - Yes, I do.

    - No, you don't.



        

                       

    How could you say that?



        

                       

    You're a beautiful woman.

    You're destroying yourself.



        

                       

    You don't need that fuckin'

    leech living off you.



        

                       

    I know you better

    than you know yourself.



        

                       

    You're a tiger.

    You're stronger than I am.



        

                       

    When you set your mind

    on doing something,

    you do it better than anybody.



        

                       

    You're gonna do it.

    Okay? You'll do it.



        

                       

    Oh, God.



        

                       

    Oh, God.



        

                       

    Okay. Okay.



        

                       

    I'll try. I'll try.



        

                       

    I'll try. I will.



        

                       

    Don't be mad at me, okay?



        

                       

    I will.



        

                       

    [Crying Continues]



        

                       

    [Nicky] No matter what the problems

    were outside the count room...



        

                       

    it was all worth it.



        

                       

    The cash kept rollin' in...



        

                       

    and the suitcases

    kept comin' and goin'.



        

                       

    And let me tell you, the fuckin'

    bottom line here is... cash.



        

                       

    The only problem was

    that after a while...



        

                       

    the bosses noticed that the suitcases

    were gettin' a little light.



        

                       

    Wait a minute.

    You mean to tell me...



        

                       

    that the money we're robbing

    is being robbed?



        

                       

    Somebody's robbing from us?



        

                       

    We go through all this trouble

    and somebody's robbing us?



        

                       

    Huh?



        

                       

    Like I said, it's part of the business.

    It's considered leakage.



        

                       

    Leakage my balls.

    I want the guy who's robbing us.



        

                       

    [Nicky] Even John Nash...

    that's the guy who ran the scam...



        

                       

    he knew there wasn't much

    he could do about it.



        

                       

    You gotta know that

    a guy who helps you steal...



        

                       

    even if you take care

    of him real well...



        

                       

    he's gonna steal

    a little extra for himself.



        

                       

    Makes sense, don't it?



        

                       

    Try and make these hardheaded

    old greaseballs understand that.



        

                       

    What's the point of skimming if we're

    being skimmed? It defeats the purpose.



        

                       

    Huh?



        

                       

    They take this money because they're

    my guys, so give 'em some leeway.



        

                       

    [Nicky] But the bosses

    never believed in leeway...



        

                       

    so listen to what they do.



        

                       

    They put Artie Piscano,

    the underboss of K. C...



        

                       

    in charge of making sure

    nobody skimmed the skim.



        

                       

    - What were you doin'?

    - I was with my cumma.



        

                       

    - What are you doin' with your cumma?

    - I gave her a scheff.



        

                       

    The only trouble was,

    Piscano was a disaster.



        

                       

    This guy could fuck up

    a cup of coffee.



        

                       

    - What you been doin'?

    - I'm out there more than I'm here.



        

                       

    And little did anybody know

    where this would lead.



        

                       

    If they did, they'd would've

    been better off makin' fuckin' novena.



        

                       

    You gotta go back there

    and talk to that guy.



        

                       

    - I never got paid my expenses

    for the last trip.

    - What expenses?



        

                       

    I'm layin' money outta my own pocket

    and I never get anything back.



        

                       

    You gotta go back out there.



        

                       

    From now on, I'm gonna

    start keepin' records.



        

                       

    No records, Artie. What are

    you gonna do with records, pay taxes?



        

                       

    I keep layin' out

    my own fuckin' dough.



        

                       

    What the hell are

    we doin' over here?



        

                       

    You're goin' to Las Vegas

    at my expense.



        

                       

    Oh, fuck.

    I mean, after all...



        

                       

    [Ace] No matter how many novenas

    you could make...



        

                       

    nothing was gonna stop

    what came up next.



        

                       

    - I can't believe you're doing this.

    - We made a deal.



        

                       

    It turned out Phil Green,

    Mr. Integrity...



        

                       

    had a partner

    nobody knew about.



        

                       

    And when she showed up

    and started demanding money...



        

                       

    - Why are you doing this?

    - Because you're wrong.



        

                       

    - Yes, you are.

    - No, I am not wrong.



        

                       

    Green tried to stonewall her.



        

                       

    I will see to it that you

    do not get away with this.



        

                       

    So, she sued him in court.



        

                       

    The court will now hear the matter

    of the plaintiff, Anna Scott...



        

                       

    against Tangiers Corporation

    and its president, Phil Green.



        

                       

    - Oberon on behalf of Mr. Green.

    - Logan on behalf of Anna Scott.



        

                       

    - Mr. Oberon, you can proceed.

    - Thank you, Judge.



        

                       

    I believe he was fair,

    and I'm delighted with the decision.



        

                       

    We got a problem.



        

                       

    It didn't go too well.

    Green has to open up the books...



        

                       

    has to show how

    he got the financing.



        

                       

    Hey, that's not good.



        

                       

    [Nicky] She was doin' pretty good

    with her lawsuit.



        

                       

    But before she could start

    countin' her money...



        

                       

    the boys back home decided

    to settle the case out of court.



        

                       

    So they sent me.



        

                       

    Can you comment on

    the murder of Anna Scott?



        

                       

    - What are you talking about?

    - She was found

    last night shot in the head.



        

                       

    Was this just

    a real estate partnership?



        

                       

    Her lawyer said

    you were partners.



        

                       

    We were involved in minor

    real estate deals many years ago.



        

                       

    It was never a partnership.



        

                       

    Did you ever hear

    of the.   caliber killer?



        

                       

    [Ace] Now, instead of the cops

    only looking at Nicky...



        

                       

    they started looking

    at Green too.



        

                       

    And he was supposed to be

    our squeaky clean front man.



        

                       

    I had to start giving interviews

    to make sure everybody knew...



        

                       

    the casino

    was on the up and up.



        

                       

    So how often do you

    really fill in for him?



        

                       

    Green's here about

    two or three times a month...



        

                       

    and he's busy

    with real estate deals.



        

                       

    So in Green's absence,

    then, you're the boss?



        

                       

    I serve with the pleasure

    of the chairman of the board.



        

                       

    My responsibilities are

    to run the day-to-day operations.



        

                       

    So day-to-day, then,

    you're the boss?



        

                       

    Well, in a sense, you could say

    that I am the boss...



        

                       

    when Mr. Green is away.



        

                       

    You could say that.



        

                       

    Hmm, have you read this?



        

                       

    About Mr. Rothstein.



        

                       

    It says, "The Midwest bookmaker

    with mob ties...



        

                       

    says that he is the real boss

    of the $    million...



        

                       

    Tangiers casino empire."



        

                       

    Did he really say that?



        

                       

    Why, of course he said that.

    It's right here.



        

                       

    Has that man even filed

    for his license yet?



        

                       

    I don't know.

    We have to check the files.



        

                       

    Without gettin' your shorts

    in a knot, would you do that?



        

                       

    And kinda check closely, 'cause we may

    have to kick a kike's ass outta town.



        

                       

    Thank you.



        

                       

    A Gaming Control Board

    investigation...



        

                       

    of Tangiers executive

    Sam Rothstein's application...



        

                       

    for a gaming license

    is underway.



        

                       

    Rothstein, who heads the Tangiers Casino

    operation and is a boyhood friend...



        

                       

    of Las Vegas mob boss

    Nicky Santoro...



        

                       

    could lose his ability

    to work in the casino...



        

                       

    [Muted]



        

                       

    - [Phone Rings]

    - Hello?



        

                       

    - I gotta meet Clean Face.

    What about the Chez Paris?

    - You can't.



        

                       

    - You gotta make a reservation.

    It's all booked up.

    - No, no.



        

                       

    It's impossible.

    You gotta make a reservation.



        

                       

    It's very difficult

    to get in.



        

                       

    I'll use the service entrance.

    I'll see you at  :  .



        

                       

    All right.



        

                       

    The battle between State gaming

    officials and Tangiers Casino boss...



        

                       

    Sam "Ace" Rothstein

    is heating up.



        

                       

    Tonight, an up-to-the-minute look

    at Ace Rothstein's attempt

    to get state licensing...



        

                       

    despite law enforcement allegations

    of Rothstein's

    organized crime connections.



        

                       

    Will Sam Rothstein's friendship

    with alleged organized crime

    figure Nicky Santoro...



        

                       

    keep Rothstein from running

    the Tangiers Casino?



        

                       

    And can the integrity

    of state gaming laws be jeopardized

    by a boyhood friendship?



        

                       

    - Why don't you take it easy

    on that stuff? Huh?

    - [Newscaster Continues]



        

                       

    Come on.

    Let me help you down.



        

                       

    We're talking

    about some stuff.



        

                       

    At    Will a boyhood friendship

    unseat Rothstein

    as the Tangiers Casino boss?



        

                       

    Exclusive on the KBBO

    special news report.



        

                       

    - Go down. Just... go downst-

    - [Newscaster Continues]



        

                       

    You can't let this concern you, Ace.

    Don't worry.



        

                       

    It's just a political

    witch hunt.



        

                       

    Ace.



        

                       

    Do you want

    something to drink?



        

                       

    - Charlie, a refill?

    - Yeah, great.



        

                       

    No. Hey, Mr. Clark.

    I've been tryin' to reach you.



        

                       

    - You're tougher to get

    than the president.

    - Well, I've been busy.



        

                       

    Yeah? At least you could return

    my phone calls, though.



        

                       

    Listen, Nicky,

    we talked about this.



        

                       

    And I explained to you that you might

    have to take some kind of loss.



        

                       

    Yeah.



        

                       

    I think I want my money back.



        

                       

    [Laughing]

    What are you gonna do, strong-arm me?



        

                       

    - [Laughing]

    - You know, I think you've gotten

    the wrong impression about me.



        

                       

    I think, in all fairness...



        

                       

    I should explain to you

    exactly what it is that I do.



        

                       

    Tomorrow morning I'll get up nice and

    early, take a walk to the bank...



        

                       

    and walk in and see, and, uh,

    if you don't have my money for me...



        

                       

    I'll crack your fuckin' head

    wide open in front of everybody.



        

                       

    And just about the time

    that I'm comin' out of jail...



        

                       

    hopefully you'll be comin'

    out of your coma.



        

                       

    And guess what? I'll split

    your fuckin' head open again.



        

                       

    'Cause I'm fuckin' stupid.

    I don't give a fuck about jail.



        

                       

    That's my business.

    That's what I do.



        

                       

    We know what you do. You fuck people

    out of money and get away with it.



        

                       

    - You can't talk to me like that.

    - Hey, you fat Irish prick!

    You put my money to sleep!



        

                       

    - Get my money, or I'll put

    your brain to sleep.

    - Sam!



        

                       

    Never mind Sam.

    This is personal.



        

                       

    I'll be there in the morning. You can

    try me, Fatso. You fuckin' try me.



        

                       

    You think he got the point?



        

                       

    What're you doin'?

    He's a square guy, for chrissakes.

    He's gonna run to the F.B.I.



        

                       

    That prick's been dodgin' me

    for three weeks.

    You're tryin' to tell me what to do.



        

                       

    I'm not tryin' to tell you what to do.

    You're outta line. Where's your head?



        

                       

    Where's my head?

    Where's your fuckin' balls?



        

                       

    I'm tryin' to put somethin' big together

    here. You know what I'm talkin' about.



        

                       

    If you're actin' like this now,

    can I depend on you?



        

                       

    A lot of things gonna change.

    If you wanna be there with me,

    you're gonna have to go my way.



        

                       

    Listen, Nick, understand my situation.

    I'm responsible for thousands of people.



        

                       

    I got a hundred million a year

    goin' through the place.



        

                       

    It's all over if I don't

    get that license.



        

                       

    If it goes bad for me,

    it's bad for a lot of people.



        

                       

    Forget about your fuckin' license.

    I plant my own flag,

    you ain't gonna need a license.



        

                       

    You know, I don't know what it

    is, Sammy, but the more I talk to you...



        

                       

    the more I feel like you just

    don't want to go along with me.



        

                       

    - No, I don't want

    to come along with you.

    - All right, fine.



        

                       

    I don't want to be involved

    in anything you're talking about, okay?



        

                       

    I want to run a square joint.

    I just want my license.



        

                       

    I want everything quiet.

    That's it!



        

                       

    Quiet like this?

    "I'm the boss"? That's quiet?



        

                       

    That's taken out of context.

    I had no control over that.



        

                       

    - Ronnie and Billy will tell you

    exactly what happened.

    - Back home that looks bad.



        

                       

    Looks bad? Every time you're

    on television, I get mentioned.

    That looks bad.



        

                       

    - What the fuck happened to you?

    - What happened to me?



        

                       

    - What happened to you?

    You lost control.

    - I lost control?



        

                       

    Look at you, you're fuckin' walkin'

    around like John Barrymore.



        

                       

    A pink robe and a fuckin'

    cigarette holder? I lost control?



        

                       

    I don't wanna bring this up,

    but you been treatin' people

    with disrespect, even your wife.



        

                       

    My wife? What does she have

    to do with this?



        

                       

    She was upset about a lot of things,

    especially that whole fuckin'

    Lester Diamond incident.



        

                       

    You're the shoulder to cry on?

    Did you her tell about your

    little role in that situation?



        

                       

    No, that's not

    the fuckin' point.



        

                       

    - The point is, she's upset,

    and you've got a problem.

    - I would appreciate it...



        

                       

    if you stay out

    of my personal life.



        

                       

    - You wouldn't like it

    if I did it to you.

    - She came to talk to me.



        

                       

    What was I supposed to do?

    Throw her out?



        

                       

    - Stay away from her.

    It's none of your business.

    - It's none of my business?



        

                       

    A week ago it was. Now it's none of my

    business. When you need me, you need me.



        

                       

    The way you need me

    to vouch for you as a citizen.



        

                       

    I'm gonna have to straighten out

    what you did with this guy.



        

                       

    This guy is gonna run

    to the F.B.I. now.



        

                       

    Your head's bigger

    than your casino.



        

                       

    [Ace Narrating] I knew what

    he wanted. Nicky wanted to take over.



        

                       

    He wanted to go after Gaggi,

    the skim, everything and everybody.



        

                       

    Plus, he had stopped asking permission

    from back home for every little thing.



        

                       

    [Gunshot]



        

                       

    A casino boss and his wife were killed.

    The bulls questioned Nicky.



        

                       

    A dealer from the Sirocco.

    They questioned Nicky.



        

                       

    A bunch of stool pigeons wound up

    in the trunks of their cars.

    They questioned Nicky.



        

                       

    A lawyer.



        

                       

    - [Explosions]

    - They questioned Nicky.



        

                       

    When some guys that didn't pay

    their shylocks began disappearing...



        

                       

    Nicky's name was in every one

    of those newspapers.



        

                       

    Nicky was questioned

    in two dozen murders,

    but they always had to let him go.



        

                       

    There were never any witnesses.



        

                       

    [Nicky Narrating]

    The coppers blamed me

    for everything that went wrong.



        

                       

    Watch yourself.

    You're gonna get runned over, there.



        

                       

    If a guy fuckin' tripped over a

    banana peel, they'd bring me in for it.



        

                       

    Come on, be nice, huh?



        

                       

    And the bosses were no better.

    They complained

    because things don't run smooth.



        

                       

    In my line of work,

    things don't run so smooth. I'm sorry.



        

                       

    I'm dealin' with degenerate

    animals out here.



        

                       

    But the bosses,

    what do they give a fuck?



        

                       

    They're sittin' on their asses

    drinkin' anisette.



        

                       

    I'm the guy in the trenches.



        

                       

    Fuckin' bosses think it's

    a fuckin' free lunch out here.



        

                       

    Frankie, they found

    a guy's head in the desert.



        

                       

    You know about that?



        

                       

    - Yeah, I heard. Yeah.

    - Yeah.



        

                       

    Everybody's talkin'.

    They're makin' a big deal out of it.

    It's in all the papers.



        

                       

    What are you gonna do?



        

                       

    And I mean, that's no good.

    You gotta tell him to take care

    of things a little better.



        

                       

    I'll tell him, Remo.



        

                       

    [Nicky Narrating] Fuckin' bosses;

    they're smokin' their Di Nobilis...



        

                       

    and they're eatin' trippa and fuckin'

    suffritte, you know, fried pigs' guts.



        

                       

    If I want to talk private,

    I gotta go to a bus stop.



        

                       

    - What do they care long as

    I keep sendin' money back?

    - They're complainin'.



        

                       

    Let 'em complain. I'm the one

    who's here. I do all the work.



        

                       

    - Somebody don't like it, fuck 'em.

    - It's up to you.



        

                       

    They want a fuckin' war?

    I'm ready.



        

                       

    All I gotta do is take care

    of five of those guys.

    The rest will fall into place.



        

                       

    Peekaboo, you fucks, you.



        

                       

    I see you,

    you motherfuckers.



        

                       

    [Ace Narrating]

    Nicky was not only bringing

    heat on himself, but on me too.



        

                       

    The F.B.I. watched every move he made,

    but he didn't care. He just didn't care.



        

                       

    [Nicky Narrating]

    If they're gonna watch me,

    I'm gonna watch 'em right back.



        

                       

    I spent a few bucks.

    Top dollar. Who gives a shit?



        

                       

    I got the latest anti-buggin' equipment

    from the same places

    that sell to the fuckin' C.I.A.



        

                       

    I had special police frequency radios,

    F.B.I. de-scramblers,

    cameras that see in the dark.



        

                       

    And because of that,

    the miserable sons of bitches

    never caught me doin' anything.



        

                       

    [Ace Narrating]

    I got my job on the line, and

    this guy's havin' the time of his life.



        

                       

    He has every cop in the state

    watchin' him, and he's out playin' golf.



        

                       

    And at the worst

    possible time for me.



        

                       

    I had my license hearing coming up,

    and I didn't want to leave

    anything to chance.



        

                       

    I mean, if I can't work in Vegas,

    where am I gonna go?



        

                       

    You've been very open with us.

    I mean, your books and papers.



        

                       

    That's gonna mean something

    when you go before the commission.



        

                       

    - All I ask is a fair hearing.

    - This kind of honesty will

    guarantee that fair hearing.



        

                       

    - All right, well, we'll move on to...

    - [Airplane Engine Sputtering]



        

                       

    - [Engine Sputtering]

    - I wanted to hear

    the summary about Kansas City.



        

                       

    What the fuck is this?



        

                       

    [Engine Sputtering]



        

                       

    Where's this guy

    gonna land, the fairway?



        

                       

    They're fuckin' agents, Frankie.

    Look at this.



        

                       

    [Ace Narrating]

    The Feds were watching Nicky

    play golf for so long...



        

                       

    they ran out of gas.



        

                       

    Just what I needed, right

    in front of the Control Board.



        

                       

    A hundred dollars,

    whoever hits the plane.



        

                       

    And as if things weren't bad enough,

    in comes Piscano,

    the Kansas City underboss.



        

                       

    He ran that little grocery store

    in Kansas City

    where they bought the suitcases.



        

                       

    Fightin' over those suitcases again.

    You know what that means, right?



        

                       

    I gotta take another trip to Vegas, and

    it's gonna cost me another couple grand.



        

                       

    [Ace Narrating]

    He ran it with his brother-in-law...



        

                       

    but mostly what he did was complain

    about his trips to Vegas.



        

                       

    You gotta lay down the law, otherwise

    they're gonna make a fool out of you.



        

                       

    I write it all down. Every fuckin'

    nickel goes down. Receipts...



        

                       

    - Hey, oh, wha...

    What's the matter with you?

    - Everything's here.



        

                       

    - Since when do you talk like that?

    - I'm sorry.



        

                       

    Nance gives me trouble,

    I'll tell him I'll take the eyes

    out of his frickin' head.



        

                       

    - Again.

    - I said, "frickin' head."



        

                       

    - That's enough.

    - I'm sorry.



        

                       

    [Ace Narrating] What happens next?

    You can't believe it.



        

                       

    Who would believe that the F.B.I.

    had a wire in the place...



        

                       

    Iookin' for some information

    about some old homicide...



        

                       

    about some guy who was whacked-out

    God knows when over God knows what.



        

                       

    What's to prevent him with the suitcases

    that he could take what he wants?



        

                       

    Fuckin' Nance takes back two suitcases

    from the Tangiers.

    What about three or four?



        

                       

    We've got nobody

    in the room to watch. That's the law.



        

                       

    We can't even go into the count room

    to watch our money.

    You believe this bullshit?



        

                       

    Sure, he's got his people in there.

    They could all be in on it

    together, those fucks.



        

                       

    I'll find out. If it's Green,

    I'll bury that bastard.



        

                       

    I never trusted him.

    They trust that scumbag. I don't.



        

                       

    - I'll hit the two of them

    with a fuckin' shovel.

    - Take it easy.



        

                       

    Ma, I'm sorry.

    They're beatin' me left and right.



        

                       

    - Ma, I'm sorry. I'm all upset.

    - I know, but that's enough.



        

                       

    You know what they're doin'. I can't

    take this no more. Back and forth.



        

                       

    - Take it easy. You'll get

    a heart attack like that.

    - I know. I'm too upset.



        

                       

    [Ace Narrating]

    And the damn thing is,

    they hear all this stuff...



        

                       

    about Las Vegas

    and the casinos and suitcases...



        

                       

    and that's it.



        

                       

    [Piscano Shouting]



        

                       

    Everything's comin' outta my pocket.

    I gotta pay.



        

                       

    [Ace Narrating]

    Would you believe that

    such a thing could happen?



        

                       

    [Piscano]

    I'm in this to make money,

    not to lose money.



        

                       

    [Ace Narrating]

    Every F.B.I. man across the country

    had their ears open now.



        

                       

    [Piscano]

    If you want something done right

    you gotta do it yourself.



        

                       

    [Ace Narrating]

    I mean, Piscano, this guy

    basically sunk the whole world.



        

                       

    [Piscano's Mother]

    There are some that are good

    and some that are bad.



        

                       

    Mr. Chairman,

    members of the commission...



        

                       

    Mr. Rothstein is pleased

    to be here today.



        

                       

    [Ace Narrating]

    When the day finally came, I was ready.



        

                       

    I felt so confident that

    all I had to do was present my case.



        

                       

    We have documents, one of which is

    a report by retired F.B.I. agents...



        

                       

    which completely absolves Mr. Rothstein

    from any wrongdoing.



        

                       

    - Counselor, before you continue...

    - I want to have this marked...



        

                       

    This commission is prepared

    to act on a motion

    denying the Rothstein application.



        

                       

    - Denying?

    - Do I hear a motion seconded?



        

                       

    Mr. Chairman,

    I second the motion.



        

                       

    Do I have a vote

    on the motion?



        

                       

    - Aye.

    - Aye. Aye.



        

                       

    The ayes have it.

    This hearing is adjourned.



        

                       

    - You have to be kidding.

    - Adjourned?

    What do you mean, "Adjourned"?



        

                       

    Senator, you promised me a hearing. You

    didn't even look at the F.B.I. reports.



        

                       

    When you were my guest

    at the Tangiers Hotel,

    did you not promise me a fair hearing?



        

                       

    - I was never your guest.

    - You were never my guest?

    I never comped you?



        

                       

    - I don't comp you

    at least three times a month?

    - I'd like to answer that.



        

                       

    Mr. Rothstein is being very typical

    to this point. He's lying.



        

                       

    The only time I was at the Tangiers

    was with Barney Greenstein.



        

                       

    - Was I at that dinner?

    Tell me, was I at that dinner?

    - You were wandering.



        

                       

    - Was I at that dinner? Was I?

    - You were wandering.



        

                       

    - You were... in the...

    You were in the building.

    - I was in the building?



        

                       

    You know I was at that dinner,

    and you swore to me I would have

    a fair hearing. Did you not?



        

                       

    Did you not? Well, tell me I was at

    least at the dinner. Allow me that much.



        

                       

    - Give me that much at least!

    - Yes, you were.



        

                       

    Thanks for not calling me a liar,

    you son of a bitch. You son of a...



        

                       

    A routine licensing hearing

    turned into bedlam yesterday...



        

                       

    when the flamboyant Tangiers Casino

    executive, Sam "Ace" Rothstein...



        

                       

    - What are you runnin' for, Bob?

    - accused the state's top

    gaming officials of corruption.



        

                       

    You promised me when you were

    getting comped at my hotel.



        

                       

    You were asking me for copies

    of your bill so you could put 'em

    on your expense account.



        

                       

    In a wild outburst that followed

    his gaming license denial...



        

                       

    - Bullshit! Bullshit!

    - Rothstein followed several...



        

                       

    stunned commissioners into the hallway

    where he continued his harangue...



        

                       

    until his own lawyers

    and friends urged him to leave.



        

                       

    You have a past. I have a past.

    My past is no worse than yours.



        

                       

    But you guys think you have

    the right to pass judgment!



        

                       

    [Newscaster]

    Long suspected of running

    the Tangiers without a license...



        

                       

    yesterday's hearing was

    to determine whether someone

    with Rothstein's history...



        

                       

    was qualified to officially hold

    a top gaming post.



        

                       

    [Ace]

    Fuckin' hypocrites!



        

                       

    - What the hell's he gonna do now?

    - I don't know.



        

                       

    What's he doin'? He knows all those

    guys he yelled at are friends of ours.



        

                       

    What's the matter with him,

    making all this mess?



        

                       

    Maybe he could run things with another

    job title. What are we gonna do?



        

                       

    However he runs things,

    it's gotta be quiet.

    Let him hide upstairs in the office.



        

                       

    Say he's a janitor.

    I don't give a shit.



        

                       

    But, please, whatever job he takes,

    make sure it's something quiet.



        

                       

    [R. Strauss,

    "Also Sprach Zarathustra"]



        

                       

    [Woman Announcer]

    Ladies and gentlemen...



        

                       

    the Tangiers Hotel

    proudly presents the all-new...



        

                       

    Sam Rothstein show,

    Aces High.



        

                       

    [Disco]



        

                       

    Tonight, taped live

    from the all-new Sports Book...



        

                       

    we present the premiere showing

    of Aces High...



        

                       

    with the Sasha Semenoff

    Orchestra...



        

                       

    and the Sam Rothstein

    dancers!



        

                       

    Mr. Rothstein is a professional gambler

    and the best football

    handicapper in America;



        

                       

    a man who will take you

    inside the real Las Vegas

    as no one has ever done before.



        

                       

    And now, ladies and gentlemen,

    the new entertainment director

    of the Tangiers Hotel Casino...



        

                       

    - Mr. Sam Rothstein.

    - [Applause]



        

                       

    Welcome to the Sam Rothstein Show.

    We're very happy

    to have you here this evening.



        

                       

    The young lady to my left

    is Trudy, who is...



        

                       

    a lead new dancer

    in our fabulous show from Paris.



        

                       

    - [Applauding]

    - Our first guest this evening...



        

                       

    is Frankie Avalon.



        

                       

    - Keep an eye on him.

    - [Avalon] I've got a large family.



        

                       

    - How many kids do you have?

    - I'm very proud to say

    that we have eight children.



        

                       

    - [Applauding]

    - [Avalon] No, no, please. Please.



        

                       

    - That's amazing.

    - There's nothing to it.

    It was my pleasure.



        

                       

    - Ace, don't do it.

    - [Rimsky-Korsakov,

    "Flight Of The Bumblebee"]



        

                       

    Oh, no, no. Oh, no.



        

                       

    Oh, Jesus.



        

                       

    He's juggling!



        

                       

    [Ace] Let's not take Commissioner

    Pat Webb too seriously.



        

                       

    I recently challenged him to a debate

    on this program, and he declined.



        

                       

    What are you worried about, Pat?

    You don't have to send me any questions.



        

                       

    You can ask me

    anything you want.



        

                       

    [Stone] What the hell is he doin'

    on television, anyway?



        

                       

    He's on all night,

    screamin' about how he's gonna take

    his lawsuit to the Supreme Court.



        

                       

    He really must be crazy.

    He's gonna go to Washington with this?



        

                       

    He's out

    of his fuckin' mind.



        

                       

    It's a pity we have such hypocrisy.

    Some people do what they want.



        

                       

    Other people have to pay

    through the nose. Such is life.



        

                       

    Andy, go see him. Tell him

    maybe it's time he should quit.



        

                       

    [Ace] First of all, what they did

    was totally unconstitutional.



        

                       

    We're on the list to be heard before

    the Supreme Court of the United States.



        

                       

    This guy don't give a fuck

    about the Supreme Court.

    They want you to walk away.



        

                       

    Walk away? Andy, you can't be serious.

    How can I walk away?

    Don't you see what's at stake?



        

                       

    The old man said maybe

    your friend should give in.



        

                       

    When the old man says "maybe,"

    that's like a papal bull.



        

                       

    Not only should you quit,

    you should run.



        

                       

    Every time they mention my name

    in the papers, they mention Nicky too.



        

                       

    How the fuck

    does that help?



        

                       

    The heat he brought down

    is murder.



        

                       

    The police department was cooperative.

    He pissed 'em off.

    Nobody can make a move anymore.



        

                       

    - What are you proposing?

    - I don't know. He doesn't listen to me.



        

                       

    Maybe he should get lost

    for awhile. Would that be so bad?



        

                       

    - They ain't sendin' Nicky nowhere.

    - If he took a break...



        

                       

    it would give everybody

    time to maneuver.



        

                       

    I would forget about the maneuver.

    I would just get out.



        

                       

    [Sighs]



        

                       

    I can't do that.



        

                       

    [Ace Narrating]

    As soon as Andy got home,

    Nicky heard about our talk.



        

                       

    Next morning, bright and early,

    I get the call.



        

                       

    Great. You know, I've got to do

    some shopping. You want to go?



        

                       

    [Ace Narrating] Getting a call

    from Nicky wasn't easy.



        

                       

    Even the codes didn't work.

    So we figured out another act.



        

                       

    If a phone's tapped, the Feds can only

    listen in on the stuff involving crimes.



        

                       

    So on routine calls, they have

    to click off after a few minutes.



        

                       

    [Woman] Yeah, I got

    a sprained fuckin' elbow.



        

                       

    - Yeah.

    - Meet me at  :  .



        

                       

    - At Caesar's?

    -     yards down the road.



        

                       

    - Why?

    - Don't ask questions. Just be there.



        

                       

    Suzy Cream Cheese has

    the exact same outfit.



        

                       

    [Laughs]

    I saw something.



        

                       

    Something very cute.



        

                       

    [F.B.I. Agent] Okay, he's out.

    It's the ant. Brown unit.



        

                       

    And he's with the bogey.

    I think it's Frankie.



        

                       

    [Ace Narrating]

    Nicky started out before me...



        

                       

    because it wasn't that easy

    for him to get around.



        

                       

    Nicky couldn't even go

    for a ride without changing cars...



        

                       

    at least six times

    before he could shake all his tails.



        

                       

    Because of the planes,

    he had to use underground garages.



        

                       

    - [Tires Squealing]

    - [Slams Door]



        

                       

    - [Slams Door]

    - [Slams Door]



        

                       

    [Ace Narrating] Meeting in the middle

    of the desert always made me nervous.



        

                       

    It's a scary place.



        

                       

    I knew about the holes

    in the desert, of course.



        

                       

    And everywhere I looked,

    there could have been a hole.



        

                       

    Normally, my prospects

    of comin' back alive...



        

                       

    from a meetin' with Nicky

    were    out of    .



        

                       

    But this time, when I heard him say a

    couple of hundred yards down the road...



        

                       

    I gave myself   -  .



        

                       

    Where the fuck you get off talkin'

    to people behind my back,

    goin' over my head?



        

                       

    - What people?

    - What people? What'd you think,

    I wasn't gonna find out?



        

                       

    I don't even know

    what you're talkin' about.



        

                       

    You said I'm bringin' heat on you?

    I gotta listen to people

    because of your shit?



        

                       

    You're orderin' me out? You better get

    your own fuckin' army, pal!



        

                       

    I didn't order you or anybody.

    I told Andy Stone that you had heat,

    and that was a problem.



        

                       

    - You want me to get out

    of my own fuckin' town?

    - Yeah.



        

                       

    Let the bullshit blow over

    so I can run the casino.



        

                       

    Anything goes wrong

    with the casino, it's my ass.

    It's not yours. It's my ass.



        

                       

    I don't know whether you know

    you have your fuckin' casino

    because I made that possible!



        

                       

    I'm what counts out here.

    Not your fuckin' country clubs

    or your fuckin' TV shows!



        

                       

    And what the fuck

    are you doin' on TV anyhow?



        

                       

    I get calls from home every day.

    They think you went batshit!



        

                       

    I'm only on TV because

    I gotta be able to hang around

    the casino. You understand.



        

                       

    You could have had

    the food-and-beverage job

    without goin' on television!



        

                       

    You wanted to go on TV.



        

                       

    Yeah, I wanted to go on TV.

    That way I have a forum.

    I can fight back.



        

                       

    They know they can't fuck around

    with me like they could

    if I was an unknown. That's right.



        

                       

    You're makin'

    a spectacle of yourself.



        

                       

    Me? I wouldn't even be

    in this situation if it wasn't for you.



        

                       

    Every time I meet somebody,

    the question is: Do I know you?



        

                       

    - Sure, now you wanna blame

    your fuckin' license on me.

    - No, Nicky.



        

                       

    When you asked me

    if you could come out here...



        

                       

    what did I tell you?

    Do you remember?



        

                       

    - Back up a fuckin' minute here.

    - Do you remember what I told you?



        

                       

    I asked you? When the fuck did

    I ever ask you if I could come out here?



        

                       

    Get this through your head,

    you Jew motherfucker, you!



        

                       

    You only exist out here because of me!

    That's the only reason!



        

                       

    Without me,

    you personally...



        

                       

    Every fuckin' wise guy still around will

    take a piece of your fuckin' Jew ass!



        

                       

    Then where you gonna go?

    You're fuckin' warned.



        

                       

    Don't go over my head again,

    you motherfucker, you!



        

                       

    [Door Slams, Tires Squeal]



        

                       

    Crack that whip



        

                       

    - Give the past the slip

    - Well, we got company.



        

                       

    Step on a crack



        

                       

    - [Murmuring]

    - Break your mama's back



        

                       

    When a problem comes along

    you must whip it



        

                       

    Before the preacher

    talks too long



        

                       

    - You must whip it

    - Did you see that?



        

                       

    Dumb Jew motherfucker. Grew up together,

    and he's actin' like he don't know me.



        

                       

    I know we're supposed to avoid each

    other, but there's ways to do things.



        

                       

    Fuck him.



        

                       

    - To Abraham Lincoln.

    - [Murmuring Agreement]



        

                       

    - Don't let it bother you.

    - Does it look like it's botherin' me?



        

                       

    Why do I give a fuck?



        

                       

    That prick. He won't even look over.

    What's his fuckin' problem?



        

                       

    - Fuckin' Jews stick together,

    don't they?

    - They're havin' a good time.



        

                       

    - So are we.

    - Whip it good



        

                       

    - [Rings]

    - Yeah?



        

                       

    - Sam, we got a problem.

    - What is it?



        

                       

    The little guy. Nobody told him

    he was eighty-sixed from the joint.



        

                       

    We turned our heads and made out

    we didn't know who he was.



        

                       

    He's over at the    table

    with his nose wide open.



        

                       

    He took money out of his own kick.

    His nose is open for about      .



        

                       

    - Now he's really pissed.

    - Oh, no.



        

                       

    - He wants a       marker.

    - Just give him ten.



        

                       

    That's it.

    I'll be right down.



        

                       

    - He's gonna come up with      

    the way you want it.

    - No,      . I said   !



        

                       

    Go get it. I don't give a fuck

    where you get it. Fuckers.

    They take but don't give back.



        

                       

    I ain't got a home

    I got a phone



        

                       

    How the fuck can you grin?

    How the fuck can you grin?



        

                       

    You know how much I'm stuck?

    You give a fuck? Do you?



        

                       

    Give yourself a hand,

    right across your fuckin' mouth.



        

                       

    Look at this beaut

    they put in now.



        

                       

    Sherbert send you

    to rob me now?



        

                       

    Been fuckin' knockin' everybody's dick

    all night? Been beating the customers?



        

                       

    Huh, jag-off? Hit me.



        

                       

    Take this stiff and pound it

    up your fuckin' ass.



        

                       

    Hit me again.



        

                       

    Take this one and stick it

    up your sister's ass. Hit me again.



        

                       

    That's it. Keep lookin' at him.

    If you had any heart at all,

    you'd be stealin' for a livin'.



        

                       

    Hit me again! What the fuck

    you keep lookin' at him for?



        

                       

    You fuckin'... Look at this,    fuckin'

    paints in a row. Hit me again.



        

                       

    You should pay as fast

    as you collect, you know.



        

                       

    - You gotta get outta here.

    - Tell this Jew motherfucker

    to pay that marker off.



        

                       

    I'm here to help you.

    You're gonna bury us both.



        

                       

    - Just give me the money.

    Give me the fuckin' money.

    - I'm gonna okay you ten.



        

                       

    Then you gotta get out

    before the cops are all over you.



        

                       

    Ten and that's it.



        

                       

    What are you starin' at,

    you bald-headed Jew prick?



        

                       

    - Come on, come on.

    Let's get outta here.

    - I'm still gonna get you, fucker.



        

                       

    Get outta here?

    I got a marker comin'. Deal.



        

                       

    [Man] Everything's changed now.

    You're talking about a divorce.



        

                       

    You're asking for alimony payments

    and child support, and now custody.



        

                       

    I just want what any

    divorced woman would get.



        

                       

    She's only sober

    about two hours a day.



        

                       

    It's usually from   :   in the morning

    'til  :   in the afternoon.



        

                       

    If I gave her her money and her jewels,

    she's gonna piss it all away in a year.



        

                       

    Where would you be then?

    Comin' right back to me...



        

                       

    - or findin' some other excuse to come...

    - We had a deal.



        

                       

    Remember that?



        

                       

    He said if it didn't work out

    between us, I could get my things,

    and I could leave.



        

                       

    Look in my eyes.



        

                       

    Look-Look in my eyes.

    You know me.



        

                       

    Do you see anything that makes

    you think I would ever let...



        

                       

    someone in your condition

    take my child away from me?



        

                       

    Do you?



        

                       

    You know that won't happen.



        

                       

    [Ace Narrating]

    And after all this time...



        

                       

    and as hard as I tried,

    as much as I wanted...



        

                       

    I could never reach her.



        

                       

    I could never make

    her love me.



        

                       

    I always felt she should have gone

    for all that money...



        

                       

    being somebody

    for the first time in her life...



        

                       

    a home, a kid.



        

                       

    That's not what happened.

    It didn't work out that way.



        

                       

    - Everything all right?

    - [Ace Continues]

    I mean, what could we do?



        

                       

    After a while, we'd just take breathers

    from each other. Little separations.



        

                       

    At that time, I remember Ginger

    took Amy to Beverly Hills.



        

                       

    She was gonna spend

    a week shopping.



        

                       

    - Yes, Mr. Rothstein.

    - Operator, the Beverly Hotel

    in Beverly Hills, please.



        

                       

    - [Operator] Beverly Hotel.

    - [Ace] Mrs. Sam Rothstein, please.



        

                       

    Mr. and Mrs. Rothstein

    have checked out already.



        

                       

    Mr. and Mrs. Rothstein?



        

                       

    Hey, little Dale Evans.



        

                       

    - Yes, they both checked out.

    - Thank you.



        

                       

    [Hangs Up Receiver]



        

                       

    [Phone Ringing]



        

                       

    Hello. Yeah.



        

                       

    My wife is with an old friend

    of hers in L.A.



        

                       

    Some lowlife.

    A guy named Lester Diamond.



        

                       

    My daughter is with them, and I think

    they're gonna try and kidnap her.



        

                       

    - Is there anybody you can send?

    - We'll take care of it.



        

                       

    [Doorbell Rings]



        

                       

    We got a number and an address.



        

                       

    - Hello. Is this Lester?

    - Hello.



        

                       

    Who's calling?



        

                       

    This is Sam Rothstein. I want to talk

    to Ginger. Put her on the phone.



        

                       

    She's not here, Sam.



        

                       

    Listen to me very carefully.

    I want to talk to Ginger.



        

                       

    I want my kid back.

    I want her put on a plane immediately.



        

                       

    - I know she's there. Don't fuck around.

    - Sam, I wouldn't.



        

                       

    - [Lester Snaps Fingers]

    - You shouldn't do this.



        

                       

    - [Snapping Fingers]

    - [Ace] You understand?

    Put her on the fuckin' phone.



        

                       

    Sam, I don't know where she is.



        

                       

    [Lester Stammering] So... listen...

    Can I call you back?



        

                       

    -    -   -    .

    - Mm-hmm.     .



        

                       

    - Okay, I'll call you right back.

    - Right away.



        

                       

    - Right back.

    - You got it.



        

                       

    Schmuck. All right,

    I just bought us a few minutes.



        

                       

    You want to get back

    at this prick? Hmm?



        

                       

    - Okay, you got what?

    Two million in that box?

    - [Snorts]



        

                       

    Hey, you got a minute? He's got

    two million in the box, am I right?



        

                       

    You let him

    keep your jewels.



        

                       

    We take the cash and the only other

    thing he cares about. Huh? Her majesty.



        

                       

    We go to Europe.

    You dye your hair.



        

                       

    I don't want to go to Europe.

    I want to go to see "The Elephant Man."



        

                       

    We're going to Europe.

    Let the adults talk. You dye your hair.



        

                       

    You get plastic surgery

    like we talked about.



        

                       

    You're the mother. How much you think

    he'll pay to get this kid back?



        

                       

    - I don't want to go to Europe.

    - Shut your mouth.

    You know where she gets this?



        

                       

    - You shut up.

    - [Diamond]

    You want me to come over there?



        

                       

    I'll smack your face.

    Don't give me your shit!



        

                       

    This has always been a dream,

    but now we're going.



        

                       

    - Lester, he called you here.

    He called you right here.

    - That's who was on the phone.



        

                       

    - I just talked to him.

    - So he knows where you are.



        

                       

    That means he's sending some guys

    over here, probably right now.



        

                       

    It means he's sitting

    by the phone, like a dumbbell...



        

                       

    - waiting for me to call him back.

    - He's sitting by the phone

    just waiting for you to call.



        

                       

    What do you think we're gonna do?

    He's probably got guys

    outside the fuckin' house!



        

                       

    - This is fuckin' bullshit!

    This is bullshit!

    - Get your bag! Let's go!



        

                       

    - Oh, what bullshit? What?

    You want to talk it over now?

    - Okay, you done yakkin'?



        

                       

    - Go, go! Get in the car!

    - Go, go, go.



        

                       

    Just relax.

    Nobody's killing anybody.



        

                       

    - [Ginger Babbling]

    I think he's gonna kill me.

    - Just relax.



        

                       

    Call me back here in exactly an hour

    on this phone. I'll see what I can do.



        

                       

    I'm gonna call you back

    in an hour at this number...



        

                       

    - and you're gonna be there, right?

    - I'll be here.



        

                       

    Listen, don't do anything else crazy,

    okay? You all right? Okay.



        

                       

    Bye.



        

                       

    - Just knock it off.

    You two knock it off.

    - She started it.



        

                       

    - She started the whole thing.

    I'm just standing here.

    - Get in the car.



        

                       

    You're not gonna drive. Don't even think

    you're gonna drive. I'm gonna drive.



        

                       

    - I'm not gonna drive

    with some crazy woman.

    - You're driving me nuts!



        

                       

    Get on the passenger side! And I'm

    sending this kid to Bolivia in a box!



        

                       

    Can we...



        

                       

    [Starts Car, Stereo Blaring]



        

                       

    You can go your own way



        

                       

    [Volume Decreases]

    Go your own way



        

                       

    Tell me why



        

                       

    - Everything turned around

    - Ginger called me.



        

                       

    - [Continues]

    - Yeah.



        

                       

    - I just told you she called me.

    - What'd she want?



        

                       

    She was afraid to call you.



        

                       

    - She's with that cocksucker.

    They got Amy.

    - That's why I'm here.



        

                       

    She wants to come back, but she's

    afraid you're gonna whack her out.



        

                       

    - They're gonna kidnap my kid.

    What do you want?

    - I know.



        

                       

    Why didn't you come to me? I mean,

    this is family. It ain't business.



        

                       

    You make calls back home. It makes us

    look bad out here. You know what I mean?



        

                       

    Back and forth,

    this one and that one.



        

                       

    In the meantime,

    she's gone anyway.



        

                       

    - Am I right?

    - [Sighs]



        

                       

    What am I going to do

    with this woman?



        

                       

    - Driving me fuckin' crazy.

    - I think if you, uh...



        

                       

    assure her that she's gonna be

    all right, she'll come back.



        

                       

    Driving me fuckin' crazy.



        

                       

    Once you get her here,

    you think about it.



        

                       

    Wait 'til you get the kid back.

    She wants to come back.



        

                       

    That's the main thing here.



        

                       

    You want your kid, don't you?

    Huh?



        

                       

    - [Rings]

    - [Ace] Hello.



        

                       

    Hi, it's me. Just who you wanted

    to talk to, right?



        

                       

    Listen, I'm not gonna

    ask you where you are.



        

                       

    Just, please, put Amy on a plane,

    any plane, to get her here right away.



        

                       

    - That's all I'm asking.

    - Do you...



        

                       

    I mean, I don't think

    she should go by herself.



        

                       

    [Sighs]

    What do you mean?



        

                       

    [Crying]

    What I mean is...



        

                       

    Do you think if I came back...



        

                       

    Do you think

    you could forgive me?



        

                       

    [Sighs]

    I gotta tell you, I don't know.



        

                       

    I understand that.



        

                       

    I know I fucked up.



        

                       

    - What about the money? Where's the box?

    - I gotta tell ya...



        

                       

    I made some mistakes,

    and I spent some money.



        

                       

    - What's it under?

    - Pretty serious.



        

                       

    - How serious?

    - [Sniffling] It's under   .



        

                       

    - It's under      ?

    - Yeah.



        

                       

    - The rest of the two million

    is still there?

    - Yeah, I got the rest.



        

                       

    Okay, no big deal.

    That's okay.



        

                       

    He got his   .



        

                       

    That I'll live with.

    Any more, I couldn't.



        

                       

    Okay.



        

                       

    All right, all right. Where are you?

    I'll send a plane for you right away.



        

                       

    Hi, Sam.



        

                       

    So what'd you do with it?



        

                       

    With what?



        

                       

    With the money.



        

                       

    He needed some clothes.



        

                       

          for clothes?



        

                       

    He wanted a watch too.



        

                       

    -       for clothes and a watch?

    - Mm-hmm.



        

                       

    Mm-hmm.



        

                       

    - Good evening, senora. This way.

    - Geno.



        

                       

    [Ace Narrating]

    The good part was I had Amy back.



        

                       

    So we went home, had the housekeeper

    stay over, put the kid to bed.



        

                       

    I calmed myself down,

    and we went to dinner.



        

                       

    I tried to keep things

    nice and civil...



        

                       

    but, hey,

          for three suits?



        

                       

    That doesn't

    make much sense.



        

                       

    First of all, he's not gonna wear

    thousand-dollar suits.



        

                       

    Let's say he did,

    which he won't.



        

                       

    How you gonna get fitted

    for    suits in three days?



        

                       

    - I'm confessin'

    - I mean, how could you

    get fitted that fast?



        

                       

    I can't get fitted that fast,

    and I pay twice as much.



        

                       

    - I bought him a watch too.

    - Yeah.



        

                       

    But even if you bought him a really nice

    watch, one that he thought was nice...



        

                       

    He doesn't know

    what the fuck a good watch is.



        

                       

    - Say you go five, ten, twelve grand...

    - Yeah.



        

                       

    at the most,

    which is impossible, for him.



        

                       

    Plus, at the most, three suits,

         apiece. That still leaves what?



        

                       

    - Around      ?

    - Would you knock it off, Sam?



        

                       

    - I'm just trying to figure it out.

    - There's nothing to figure out.



        

                       

    I'm home.

    We're working it out.



        

                       

    I've been told before,

    "We're working it out."



        

                       

    You think

    that you're home...



        

                       

    after what you just put me

    through with Amy, is a favor to me?



        

                       

    So, counting the watch,

    let's say another     ...



        

                       

    for expenses over the weekend...



        

                       

    of which you must have

    had a good time.



        

                       

    I know he did.

    That's for sure.



        

                       

    I know that fuckin' piece

    of shit had a good fuckin' time.



        

                       

    On my money.



        

                       

    You might as well have fucked him,

    which you probably did anyway.



        

                       

    You're lookin' at me

    a certain way.



        

                       

    You're teary-eyed, huh?



        

                       

    You're upset. You're

    a good actress, you know that?



        

                       

    Good fuckin' actress.



        

                       

    You can fuckin' get

    that pity out of people.



        

                       

    I'm not a john.

    You understand?



        

                       

    You always thought I was,

    but I'm not. And I'm not a sucker.



        

                       

    That fuckin' pimp cocksucker.



        

                       

    He's lucky I didn't

    kill him last time.



        

                       

    Lucky he's fuckin' livin'.

    If you would have stayed with Amy...



        

                       

    and you would have ran away,

    he would have been fuckin' dead.



        

                       

    Both of you. Dead. Dead.



        

                       

    Dreamin' dreams of you

    Little babe



        

                       

    [Ginger Whispering] No,

    it isn't right. It isn't fair.



        

                       

    [Indistinct Whispering

    Continues]



        

                       

    Yes.



        

                       

    He doesn't come home at night.

    What is the big fuckin' deal?



        

                       

    I go... Listen, I just

    can't fuckin' take it.



        

                       

    Why should I fuckin' take it?

    That wasn't the deal.



        

                       

    He acts like I'm the only one

    around here with a fuckin' past.



        

                       

    He'll never let me

    live it down.



        

                       

    Well, yes, I have tried.

    Of course I've tried.



        

                       

    What the fuck do you think

    I came back here for?



        

                       

    No, I'm not.

    I want to have him killed.



        

                       

    Yes, I want him killed.

    I've fuckin' had it.



        

                       

    So are you with me on this?



        

                       

    You want to get rid of me?

    Here I am.



        

                       

    Go ahead.

    Get rid of me.



        

                       

    - Hello.

    - [Gasping] Yes, I do!



        

                       

    I fuckin' hate you!

    I can't take it anymore!



        

                       

    - Yes, I want to kill you!

    I hate your fuckin' guts!

    - You hate my guts?



        

                       

    - I'm sick of being with you!

    - I want you to come with me now!



        

                       

    - Come with me now. Come with me now.

    - [Gasping]



        

                       

    - [Screams]

    - I want you out.

    I want you out of here.



        

                       

    - [Continues Screaming]

    - I want you out of here!

    I want you out of here!



        

                       

    Take your fuckin' bag

    and get out of here!



        

                       

    I'll go, but I want

    my money right now!



        

                       

    - You'll get your money! Don't worry.

    - The arrangement is over.



        

                       

    - No kidding!

    - And I still get my money.



        

                       

    I need some cash right now!

    You can't just put me in the street!



        

                       

    You haven't been straight

    with me ever since I met you!



        

                       

    You never even loved me

    in the first place!



        

                       

    I need eyes in the back

    of my head with you, you fuckin' bitch!



        

                       

    How could I love you?

    You treat me like I'm your fucking dog!



        

                       

    - You're lower than a dog!

    - [Ginger] Fuck you!



        

                       

    Here! Here!

    Is this enough money?



        

                       

    Will it last you

    two fuckin' days? Take it!



        

                       

    - Greedy bitch. Take the fuckin' money.

    - I'm going to the bank...



        

                       

    - and I'm getting my jewelry too!

    - It opens at  :   a.m.



        

                       

    Don't send your guys down there

    to stop me! I mean it!



        

                       

    I guarantee you,

    I will not stop you.



        

                       

    You're not getting rid of me

    with one fucking suitcase!



        

                       

    Come back tomorrow and get the rest.

    Just get out of here. Fine!



        

                       

    - I'm taking Amy.

    - You're not taking Amy.



        

                       

    I am.

    I'm waking her up right now.



        

                       

    You're stoned. You're a junkie.

    Get out of here.



        

                       

    - I am not! She's my daughter too!

    - Get out of here!



        

                       

    Send my lawyers a letter,

    god-fuckin'-damn you!



        

                       

    You're not getting away with this!

    You're not gonna cheat me out of my end!



        

                       

    Fucker!



        

                       

    [Revs Engine]



        

                       

    [Tires Screeching]



        

                       

    [Car Approaching]



        

                       

    [Car Door Closes]



        

                       

    [Door Opens, Closes]



        

                       

    [Ace Narrating] The funny thing was,

    after all that, I didn't want her to go.



        

                       

    She was the mother of my kid.

    I loved her.



        

                       

    And later, I realized I didn't want

    to give her the money...



        

                       

    because if I did,

    I knew I'd never see her again.



        

                       

    - Oh. Have a good day at school, okay?

    - Okay.



        

                       

    Okay, angel.



        

                       

    [Clears Throat]



        

                       

    From now on, I have to know

    where you and Amy are at all times.



        

                       

    Here's a beeper.



        

                       

    I want you

    to keep it on you.



        

                       

    It's very light.



        

                       

    So I can call you

    whenever I have to.



        

                       

    Okay?



        

                       

    [Nicky] What are you supposed to do?

    What do you want to do?



        

                       

    You want to stay the way you are?

    You can't do that.



        

                       

    Listen, two people don't get along,

    at some point you gotta call it.



        

                       

    It's none of my business,

    but I think that's what you gotta do.



        

                       

    You're right.

    I know.



        

                       

    - I was just...

    - What? What?



        

                       

    - Nothing.

    - What were you gonna say?



        

                       

    - I don't...

    - Tell me what you were gonna say.



        

                       

    - Yeah?

    - Yeah.



        

                       

    I was thinking maybe

    you know somebody at the bank...



        

                       

    who could help me

    get my jewelry out?



        

                       

    There's a lot

    of money in there.



        

                       

    I'd be willing to take care

    of anybody who helped me out.



        

                       

    - Let me think about that.

    - Okay.



        

                       

    Let me see who I got. Gotta get

    somebody I can trust, you know?



        

                       

    - You know he's never gonna

    give me my jewelry.

    - Hmm.



        

                       

    He holds that key so tight,

    he's probably got it stuck up his ass.



        

                       

    [Laughing]

    You're right. That's Sammy.



        

                       

    And he's probably

    got it there too.



        

                       

    [Laughs]



        

                       

    He's so fuckin' lucky.

    I could have buried him.



        

                       

    I could have gone to Europe

    and taken the baby.



        

                       

    - Then he'd have tracked me down,

    and he'd have killed me.

    - No, he wouldn't.



        

                       

    - I would have.

    - [Laughs]



        

                       

    - He'd have been right too. Seriously.

    - Come on.



        

                       

    - You don't take a guy's kid

    and then take off.

    - I didn't.



        

                       

    I mean, I did, but then I did exactly

    what you told me to do, and I came back.



        

                       

    - You did. You're right.

    You did. I like that.

    - Exactly what you said.



        

                       

    - That's what I like about you.

    You did the right thing.

    - I did what you told me.



        

                       

    - Yes, you did.

    - Because you always tell me

    the right thing to do.



        

                       

    Yeah.



        

                       

    And now that it's all over



        

                       

    He really fucked himself up

    out here, didn't he?



        

                       

    - He sure did.

    - Everything went to his head.



        

                       

    - [Sighs] Changed.

    - Changed.



        

                       

    - He did. He ain't the same person.

    - No, he's not.



        

                       

    - He really thinks who the fuck he is.

    - Exactly.



        

                       

    He hates me.



        

                       

    [Crying]

    He hates my fuckin' guts.



        

                       

    Come on, come on.

    You're a toughie. You can take this.



        

                       

    - Don't cry.

    - I'm not as tough as you think I am.



        

                       

    Yes, you are.



        

                       

    I'm not, and he scares

    the shit out of me.



        

                       

    - I never know what he's gonna do.

    - Come on.



        

                       

    - Don't be scared.

    - I need some help. I do.



        

                       

    I need some help.



        

                       

    You gotta help me.



        

                       

    I need a new sponsor, Nicky.



        

                       

    I do.

    I need a new sponsor.



        

                       

    - Is that what you want?

    - Yeah.



        

                       

    - A sponsor?

    - Yeah.



        

                       

    Okay.

    Don't worry about it.



        

                       

    Nobody will fuck

    with you anymore.



        

                       

    - I'll take care of you. Yes, I will.

    - Take care of me.



        

                       

    - It's what you want, isn't it?

    - Thank you. Yeah.



        

                       

    - Yeah. Uh-huh.

    - It's what you want?



        

                       

    Yes, it came from your pen,

    dear but not from your heart



        

                       

    - [Camera Shutter Clicking]

    - The third king

    The joke of the deck



        

                       

    You ended your letter enclosed

    "Please sign my check"



        

                       

    - That's Ace's wife.

    - Why, you fool



        

                       

    - You poor, sad, worthless

    foolish fool

    - Fantastic.



        

                       

    If you think that money can pay

    for the hard years I've suffered



        

                       

    'Til things broke your way



        

                       

    - This is great for the boss.

    - I'm answering your last letter

    that says we must part



        

                       

    I'm tearing up the pieces

    the way you tore up my heart



        

                       

    I smile when you kiss me

    and I thrill at your touch



        

                       

    My only sin was

    I loved you much too much



        

                       

    Win a little



        

                       

    - [Car Approaching]

    - Lose a little



        

                       

    [Car Door Slams,

    Front Door Slams]



        

                       

    - Hi.

    - Hi.



        

                       

    - You didn't answer your beeper.

    - I threw it away.



        

                       

    You threw it away?



        

                       

    I tried to do this thing. I know that

    you want me to, but it's just...



        

                       

    I'm driving down the freeway

    and the fuckin' thing's

    beep, beep, beep, beep, beep!



        

                       

    I'm in a restaurant,

    it's embarrassing.



        

                       

    I don't want to do it anymore.

    Where's Amy?



        

                       

    - I put her to bed.

    - Oh.



        

                       

    I got your cigarettes.



        

                       

    Oscar wants you to call him.



        

                       

    - So who'd you go to lunch with?

    - Jennifer.



        

                       

    - Where'd you go?

    - To the Riviera.



        

                       

    What'd you have?



        

                       

    - I had a salad.

    - What did Jennifer have?



        

                       

    She had the same.



        

                       

    Okay.



        

                       

    I want you

    to call Jennifer...



        

                       

    and I want you to tell her

    to tell you what you had for lunch.



        

                       

    I'm gonna listen in

    on the other line.



        

                       

    - Why do you want to do that?

    - You know why.



        

                       

    - Just do it.

    - Fine.



        

                       

    I just need to get

    the bowl for my thing.



        

                       

    [Line Rings]



        

                       

    [Hangs Up]

    The line's busy.



        

                       

    There's nobody there.



        

                       

    [Dialing]



        

                       

    [Line Ringing]



        

                       

    - Hello.

    - Hello, Jennifer. It's Sam.



        

                       

    All right.

    I didn't have lunch with Jennifer.



        

                       

    - [Hangs Up Receiver]

    - Okay.



        

                       

    Who were you with?



        

                       

    I was with somebody.



        

                       

    I know you were with somebody.

    Who was it?



        

                       

    I just hope it's not someone

    who I think it might be.



        

                       

    [Sighs]

    I just hope it's not that.



        

                       

    [Ace Narrating]

    I knew she fucked around.



        

                       

    She did what she did,

    and I did what I had to do...



        

                       

    but, Jesus, Nicky was the worst thing

    she could have done.



        

                       

    What if he won't stop?



        

                       

    [Ace Narrating]

    It could get us both killed.



        

                       

    I can back him off.



        

                       

    [Ace Narrating] She was

    very convincing when she wanted to be.



        

                       

    And this is how

    she backed him off.



        

                       

    [Panting]



        

                       

    Hey, Ginger.



        

                       

    Don't forget,

    if you're challenged...



        

                       

    if he asks anything,

    deny everything.



        

                       

    You understand? I don't want him

    bringing beefs back home.



        

                       

    That could really cause

    a serious problem.



        

                       

    Got to be careful.

    He's not dumb, you know?



        

                       

    You hear what I'm saying, right?



        

                       

    I know. You don't have

    to tell me that.



        

                       

    What? Do you think I'm stupid?



        

                       

    Do I think you're stupid? No.



        

                       

    I think you're beautiful.

    But I gotta go.



        

                       

    [Ace Narrating]

    By this time, Nicky had things

    so fucked up on the streets...



        

                       

    that every time Marino went back home,

    the packages got smaller and smaller.



        

                       

    It got to the point,

    when he walked into the place...



        

                       

    he didn't know whether he was

    going to be kissed or killed.



        

                       

    [Gaggi] Frankie,

    I want to ask you something.



        

                       

    It's private.



        

                       

    But I want you

    to tell me the truth.



        

                       

    Of course, Remo.



        

                       

    I want you to tell me

    the truth, mind you.



        

                       

    I always tell you

    the truth, Remo.



        

                       

    Frankie... the little guy...



        

                       

    he wouldn't be fucking

    the Jew's wife, would he?



        

                       

    Because if he is,

    it's a problem.



        

                       

    [Frankie Narrating]

    What could I say?



        

                       

    I knew if I gave

    the wrong answer...



        

                       

    Nicky, Ginger, Ace, all of them

    could have wound up gettin' killed.



        

                       

    Because there's one thing

    about these old-timers.



        

                       

    They don't like any fucking around

    with the other guys' wives.



        

                       

    It's bad for business.



        

                       

    So I lied, even though I knew

    that by lying to Gaggi...



        

                       

    I could wind up

    gettin' killed too.



        

                       

    - No, I ain't seen anything like that.

    - Are you sure?



        

                       

    I'm positive.



        

                       

    Remo, things are very

    fucked up down there.



        

                       

    I know.

    That's why I'm asking.



        

                       

    - You see, my main concern is Nicky.

    - Mm-hmm.



        

                       

    I want to know if he's

    doing all right, if he's okay.



        

                       

    - He's good. He's fine.

    - I'm asking you to keep

    an eye on Nicky.



        

                       

    - Do it for me.

    - No problem.



        

                       

    I wouldn't want to be jeopardizing

    anything for our friends. Understand?



        

                       

    - I understand.

    - Okay.



        

                       

    Frankie, you're a good boy.



        

                       

    Thanks, Remo.



        

                       

    [Ace Narrating]

    By now, Nicky and his crew

    had already hit rock bottom.



        

                       

    Vegas really got to him.



        

                       

    The booze, the coke, the broads.



        

                       

    I mean, he got sloppy.



        

                       

    He just wasn't

    the same Nicky anymore.



        

                       

    - You must have drank too much.

    - Go fuck yourself.



        

                       

    [Ace Continues] One night he had

    to belt a guy three times...



        

                       

    before the guy

    finally went down.



        

                       

    In the old days, Nicky would have

    decked him with one shot.



        

                       

    You add this into the mix...



        

                       

    Maybe just Vegas got to all of us.



        

                       

    His crew followed him

    right over the edge.



        

                       

    They were all tuned up

    half the time on coke.



        

                       

    They started doing stupid things.

    The worst was Blue.



        

                       

    - Hey, what do you guys want?

    - Police! Stay in the car!



        

                       

    [Ace Narrating] He never knew

    when to keep his mouth shut.



        

                       

    - [Police] Drop the gun!

    - Fuck you!



        

                       

    [Ace Continues]

    The cops shot Blue...



        

                       

    - because they thought

    his hero sandwich was a gun.

    - [Gunshots]



        

                       

    - They could have been right,

    but who knows?

    - Jesus Christ!



        

                       

    What gun? He's got

    a fuckin' hero sandwich here.



        

                       

    - What do you want? It's pitch black.

    - Pitch black!



        

                       

    - It's tinfoil. It looked like a gun!

    - You fuckin' moron!



        

                       

    - I'll be fillin' out paperwork

    for the next two months!

    - What are we gonna do?



        

                       

    - I'm sorry!

    - You jerk-off!



        

                       

    [Ace Narrating] To get even,

    Nicky's crew got stoned one night...



        

                       

    and they started shooting up

    the cops' houses.



        

                       

    It got to the point where they couldn't

    talk in the Gold Rush anymore...



        

                       

    because the Feds

    put a wire in the wall.



        

                       

    Even when they talked outside,

    they had to cover their mouths...



        

                       

    - Shit, he's covering up again.

    - because the Feds

    brought in lip readers.



        

                       

    Nicky found out from a teller

    who owed him money.



        

                       

    He asked me again

    about you and the Jew's wife.



        

                       

    Walk, walk, walk.

    What'd you say?



        

                       

    He asked me again about you

    and the Jew's wife.



        

                       

    Yeah?

    What'd you tell him?



        

                       

    I told him

    I didn't know nothin'.



        

                       

    Jiggs and Tony Gorilla said

    if you did anything, you're fucked up.



        

                       

    You think he's going home

    making a beef behind my back?



        

                       

    Nah, you would have

    heard something.



        

                       

    - What's to stop him?

    - I know, I know.



        

                       

    I don't trust him anymore,

    but they'd never okay anything.



        

                       

    Yeah, but they keep

    asking about it.



        

                       

    Sure they're asking.

    They earn with the prick.



        

                       

    I got a funny feeling he's gonna start

    a fuckin' war or something.



        

                       

    I'm not sure yet,

    but you know what I want you to do?



        

                       

    Who's this guy?

    Who's this guy?



        

                       

    That ain't nobody.



        

                       

    You know what

    I want you to do?



        

                       

    Get a couple of guys to dig

    a hole in the desert,

    then let them show you where it's at.



        

                       

    - Angelo and Buster.

    - Yeah, but I'm not sure yet.



        

                       

    - They'll do it.

    - When I'm ready, I'll say the word.



        

                       

    - Go see the Jew,

    and you make it disappear.

    - Yeah.



        

                       

    Just let me know.

    But you got to be ready.



        

                       

    You know what

    I'm talkin' about?



        

                       

    Did I say

    to do anything yet?



        

                       

    I said I'm not sure. I'll let

    you know. I want to think about it.



        

                       

    Where are these pricks at?

    Dominick said they're in the motel?



        

                       

    - There or in the fuckin' bank.

    I don't know.

    - Roll over the Jew.



        

                       

    - Hey, hey, hey That's what I say

    - [Line Ringing]



        

                       

    I can't get no



        

                       

    - Satisfaction

    - [Continues Ringing]



        

                       

    I can't get me no



        

                       

    - I can't get no

    - [Phone Rings]



        

                       

    - And I try and I try

    And I try, try, try, try

    - [Ringing Continues]



        

                       

    I can't get no

    I can't get me no



        

                       

    - When I'm watchin' my TV

    - Be right back. I'll be right back.



        

                       

    - And a man comes on to tell me

    - Rudy.



        

                       

    Any calls for me, just give them

    to Mr. Sherbert. I'll be right back.



        

                       

    - Sure, Mr. Rothstein.

    - I'm going home for a few seconds.



        

                       

    Same cigarettes as me



        

                       

    - I can't get no No, no, no

    - [Dialing]



        

                       

    Hey, hey, hey



        

                       

    - That's what I say

    - He's on his way home.



        

                       

    - Oh... okay.

    - And I'm doing this

    And I'm trying that



        

                       

    And I'm trying

    to make some dough



        

                       

    Baby, baby, baby

    baby, baby, baby



        

                       

    - Baby, baby, baby, baby, baby

    baby, baby, baby, baby

    - Hello?



        

                       

    - Baby, baby, baby, baby, baby

    baby, baby, baby, baby

    - Hello? Ginger?



        

                       

    - [Amy] Help, Daddy!

    - Amy!



        

                       

    - Amy, open the door!

    - I can't! I'm tied!



        

                       

    [Screaming]



        

                       

    - Dad!

    - What happened?



        

                       

    - Who did this to you?

    - Mommy.



        

                       

    I'm gonna get a knife

    and cut you loose, honey.



        

                       

    - No, please, please!

    - Okay, Papa will be right back.



        

                       

    - When did this happen, honey?

    - I don't know.



        

                       

    What time did your mother

    do this? When did she leave?



        

                       

    I don't know.



        

                       

    - [Sighs]

    - [Moaning]



        

                       

    [Phone Ringing]



        

                       

    - Hello?

    - Sammy.



        

                       

    - Yeah. Who's this? Nick?

    - Me.



        

                       

    - Yeah. You okay?

    - No, I'm not okay.



        

                       

    - How'd you know I was here?

    - I just wanted to talk to you.



        

                       

    Ginger's missing. She tied Amy up

    and locked her in her room.



        

                       

    I gotta find her.

    I don't know where she is.



        

                       

    Well, listen, Ginger's here

    at the Leaning Tower with me.



        

                       

    She's there with you?

    She's there with you?



        

                       

    - Yeah, she's here.

    - I'll be right over.

    [Slams Down Receiver]



        

                       

    Uh, all right.

    [Hangs Up Receiver]



        

                       

    - Comin' over. Great.

    - [Sighs]



        

                       

    Ace, listen,

    don't make a scene, all right?



        

                       

    - I want to just talk

    to that Irish bitch.

    - She didn't know who to turn to.



        

                       

    She didn't know where to turn.

    She's trying to save your marriage.



        

                       

    - Nicky, I want to talk

    to that fuckin' bitch.

    - Hey.



        

                       

    Be fuckin' nice. Calm.



        

                       

    Be nice.

    Don't fuck up in here.



        

                       

    I'll throw off my sorrow



        

                       

    Hi, Sam. [Whispering]

    Are you out of your fucking mind?



        

                       

    You tie up our kid and lock the

    fucking door? Are you out of your mind?



        

                       

    That's our child.

    Are you out of your fuckin' mind?



        

                       

    It was just for a little while,

    Sam. The baby-sitter wasn't there.



        

                       

    I ought to fuckin' have you committed.

    You fuckin' do that again, I'll...



        

                       

    - I was just gonna be out

    for a little while.

    - I should have...



        

                       

    - She was asleep.

    I was gonna be right back...

    - Listen.



        

                       

    - before she even woke up.

    - Listen, you fuckin' cunt.

    Listen to me.



        

                       

    - Fuck you. I was gonna be back...

    - Let me tell you something.



        

                       

    - before she woke up.

    - Listen to me. Listen carefully.



        

                       

    You ever touch her again, you ever

    do anything like that again...



        

                       

    I'll fuckin' kill ya,

    pure and simple.



        

                       

    You hear me?

    Pure and fuckin' simple.



        

                       

    - Why don't you just let me go, Sam?

    - I'll fuckin' kill you.



        

                       

    - You fuckin' whore.

    - I'll sign anything

    you want me to sign.



        

                       

    I just want the key to my jewelry,

    and I want you to let me go.



        

                       

    - You want your jewelry?

    - I want you to let me go.



        

                       

    And let you disgrace me,

    you fuckin' pig?



        

                       

    Let you disgrace me?

    Get up and be a mother.



        

                       

    Get in the car and go

    to the house right now.



        

                       

    Get up and get in the...

    Get... Get up. Get up!



        

                       

    - Get up. Get up.

    - I wouldn't do that if I were you.



        

                       

    - I wouldn't do that...

    - Get up!



        

                       

    - I wouldn't do that...

    - Get the fuck...

    Are you threatening me?



        

                       

    I'll fuckin' kill you

    in this place. Get up and go home.



        

                       

    - I'm going! I'm going!

    - You...



        

                       

    - Now you need approval

    from him to go home?

    - So what?



        

                       

    So who fuckin' blew you

    in the parking lot before you came in?



        

                       

    - Huh?

    - You make me sick, you fuckin'...



        

                       

    - Once a fuckin' hooker,

    always a hooker.

    - Oh, fuck you!



        

                       

    - Fuck you, Sam Rothstein! Fuck you!

    - I can't get no satisfaction



        

                       

    I can't get me no

    satisfaction



        

                       

    I can't get no

    satisfaction



        

                       

    - I can't get me no satisfaction

    - Yeah, Billy Sherbert, please.



        

                       

    - Who's this?

    - Billy, listen, I'll explain later.



        

                       

    - You got a gun at home?

    Bring it over right away.

    - Yeah.



        

                       

    - Take it easy. I'll do it.

    - Okay.



        

                       

    No-no-no-no-no

    satisfaction



        

                       

    - No-no-no-no, I can't

    get me no satisfaction

    - Leave it where it is!



        

                       

    I can't get no

    satisfaction



        

                       

    Where is he? Goddamn it,

    I want that Jew bastard killed!



        

                       

    Calm down. Shh.

    Hide her car in the back.



        

                       

    There's no reason to hide my car!

    He already knows!



        

                       

    What did I tell you? Supposin' he goes

    back home and makes a fuckin' beef?



        

                       

    - I gotta know exactly what you said.

    Tell me what you said.

    - Me? I said nothing.



        

                       

    I said, "No, no, no." Everything

    he said, I just kept saying no.



        

                       

    I told you this was

    fuckin' dangerous.



        

                       

    I said, "Ginger, this is a dangerous

    situation. Be very careful."



        

                       

    If it's so fucking dangerous,

    then why don't you kill him?



        

                       

    I'm not gonna kill him.

    Shut the fuck up.



        

                       

    - Have him killed, and get it over with!

    - Don't be such a smart ass!



        

                       

    I know the guy    years,

    I'm gonna fuckin' whack him for you?



        

                       

    Motherfucker.



        

                       

    - I knew this. I knew it.

    - What about my money?



        

                       

    How the fuck am I gonna

    get your money now?



        

                       

    You think he's gonna give you

    fuckin' money? Are you out of your mind?



        

                       

    - Look what you did to this fuckin' guy?

    - What?



        

                       

    If you would have just

    kept your fuckin' mouth shut.



        

                       

    What the fuck is the use! I should've

    never got involved... [Screams]



        

                       

    - Hey! Hey! You motherfucker, you!

    - [Screaming]



        

                       

    Ow! You fuck! You fucker!

    Get out! Get the fuck out!



        

                       

    - Get out! Get the fuck out!

    - [Crying, Screaming]



        

                       

    - No! No!

    - Get down there! Take it easy!



        

                       

    I should never have gotten involved

    with this fucking nut!



        

                       

    You'll fuckin' kill her.

    Take it easy.



        

                       

    - Get her out of here.

    Get her out of here.

    - [Crying]



        

                       

    - [Continues Crying]

    - Let's go. Let's go.



        

                       

    [Sobbing]



        

                       

    I don't need you!

    I'll get my own fucking money!



        

                       

    - [Nicky] All right.

    - I'm going to the F.B.I.!

    I'm not scared anymore!



        

                       

    - All right. Be careful.

    - You've fucked

    with me for the last time!



        

                       

    - [Car Engine Starts, Revs]

    - Okay. Yeah.



        

                       

    - [Tires Squeal]

    - Be careful. Come on. Get inside.



        

                       

    - Can you believe that?

    - Look at this motherfucker.



        

                       

    - Whew.

    - [Sighs]



        

                       

    I fucked up, Frankie.

    I fucked up good this time.



        

                       

    I should never have started

    with this fuckin' broad.



        

                       

    Take it easy.

    What could you do?



        

                       

    I mean, she threw herself

    at you, right?



        

                       

    I'm in a bad fuckin' spot here.

    You know that?



        

                       

    A bad fuckin' spot.

    [Sighs]



        

                       

    [Door Closes]



        

                       

    [Ace Narrating] I'd already left

    the kid with neighbors...



        

                       

    and I had about a million

    in cash and jewels...



        

                       

    that I gave to Sherbert

    to lock up in the hotel.



        

                       

    Put it in the hotel safe,

    then I want you to come right back.



        

                       

    [Car Approaching]



        

                       

    [Tires Squealing]



        

                       

    [Car Stops, Backs Up]



        

                       

    - She's alone.

    Take the gun and go into Amy's...

    - [Ginger Yelling, Ramming Car]



        

                       

    - Wait there for me.

    - [Ginger Screaming]

    Get out here and talk to me!



        

                       

    You fuckin' ignore me,

    you motherfucker!



        

                       

    I mean it!

    Come down here right now!



        

                       

    Get down here

    and talk to me, goddamn it!



        

                       

    Fuck you!

    Goddamn you, come out here!



        

                       

    I'm going to drive your fucking

    car through the living room!



        

                       

    You fucking coward!

    You motherfucker!



        

                       

    - Come out here and talk to me,

    you fucker!

    - Will you stop it?



        

                       

    - You're drunk. You're on drugs.

    - [Ginger] I am not!



        

                       

    - You're going to be sorry

    if you don't stop it.

    - Don't you threaten me!



        

                       

    [Panting] You are not

    threatening me anymore!



        

                       

    You fuck! You fuck!

    I'm sick of you!



        

                       

    I am fucking Nicky Santoro!

    I am! He's my new sponsor!



        

                       

    - [Siren Blares]

    - How about that, you fuckhead!



        

                       

    What are you looking at?

    Fuck off!



        

                       

    Hey. Go back inside!

    This is none of your business!



        

                       

    I don't have to take your shit

    all the time anymore!



        

                       

    I'm going to the F.B.I.!

    I will go to the police!



        

                       

    - I am not protecting

    you anymore, you fuck!

    - Mrs. Rothstein... Shh.



        

                       

    - [Ginger] He won't let me inside!

    - [Shutter Clicking Quickly]



        

                       

    Mr. Rothstein, I'm sorry. We've been

    getting some complaints about the noise.



        

                       

    - I'm trying to get in my house.

    He won't let me in.

    - I understand.



        

                       

    I won't let her in. I'm sorry,

    Randy, I'm not gonna let her in.



        

                       

    - I'm not gonna let her

    in the way she's behaving.

    - Not gonna let me in?



        

                       

    - Who knows what you're

    gonna do in there.

    - What am I gonna do?



        

                       

    I've been in the same

    clothes for two days!



        

                       

    - I want to get a few

    of my things! Big deal!

    - Okay.



        

                       

    How about if we just let her

    in the house to get a few things?



        

                       

    - This is half her house anyway.

    - I'm afraid to let her in the house.



        

                       

    - [Ginger]

    You aren't afraid, you fucker!

    - I'm afraid she'll destroy stuff.



        

                       

    - Let me in the house!

    [Kicking Plants]

    - Hey, hey, hey!



        

                       

    - Fucker! Fucker!

    - [Officers]

    Hold on! Hey! Please!



        

                       

    [Ginger] You ought to be afraid,

    the way you fuckin' treat me!



        

                       

    - [Officers] lt'll make it easier...

    - If we let her get her things...



        

                       

    - we'll be out of your hair.

    - If she calms down,

    I will let her in the house...



        

                       

    - [Ginger] I am calm!

    - If she calms down...



        

                       

    I will let her in the house

    for five minutes...



        

                       

    if you gentlemen will escort her out

    if she happens to not want to leave.



        

                       

    - Can I go in? Can I go in?

    - That's not a problem.



        

                       

    - Jeff, would you go in with her?

    - Yes. Yes. Fine! Fuck you!



        

                       

    [Shutter Clicking Quickly]



        

                       

    You wouldn't believe how mean

    he's been to me. He's locked up

    most of my important stuff.



        

                       

    You wouldn't believe how mean

    he's been to me. He's locked up

    most of my important stuff.



        

                       

    All my papers and things...

    I have to get them.

    So don't let him come up here.



        

                       

    I know they're in here

    in the desk... Fuck.



        

                       

    Just pay attention.

    He could come up here at anytime.



        

                       

    Are you watching for him?



        

                       

    Got 'em.



        

                       

    I don't want her in there

    more than a few more minutes.



        

                       

    No, it'll just be a couple...

    We got other things to do too.



        

                       

    I'll hurry her up.



        

                       

    - How's everything else besides this?

    - Fine. Fine.



        

                       

    - How's your family?

    - Not bad. In fact,

    my wife's pregnant again.



        

                       

    - Oh, good. Congratulations.

    - Thanks. Yeah.



        

                       

    We're kind of happy

    about that.



        

                       

    I just have to get this one more

    thing and then we can go.



        

                       

    [Softly] Shit! Fuck!



        

                       

    Shit! God!



        

                       

    Oh, that pisses me off!

    Don't worry about it.



        

                       

    [Footsteps Approaching]

    And it would be great...



        

                       

    if you guys could just

    follow me out of here...



        

                       

    because he's been

    threatening me!



        

                       

    Take care. Thank you.



        

                       

    [Crying]

    I can't believe this.



        

                       

    I just need to pick up a little cash

    inside. Could you come with me?



        

                       

    [Shutter Clicking Quickly]



        

                       

    - Clark, you've got to stop her.

    You've got to stop her.

    - I'm sorry, Sam.



        

                       

    - What can I do?

    - She's a fuckin' junkie.

    She's out of her fucking mind!



        

                       

    She has the keys.

    It's still in both your names.



        

                       

    - Oh!

    - [Clark] There's nothing

    I can do. I'd like to help...



        

                       

    - but I can't.

    - Legally, she can't take that stuff.



        

                       

    Legally, she can't take that stuff.

    Half of everything is mine.

    Ace, listen to me.



        

                       

    - There's nothing I can do.

    - Half... I'm coming down.



        

                       

    [Softly]

    Shit! Goddamn it!



        

                       

    Um, I'm gonna need a bag. If you could

    just ask the guy for the big bag.



        

                       

    - Go get a bag, man.

    - Here, here.



        

                       

    - Lady, I can't take it.

    - No, you can, you can.

    You've been so nice to me.



        

                       

    - Yes, just hold the top open.

    All right? And I can...

    - [Shutter Clicks]



        

                       

    - [Car Approaching, Metal Scraping]

    - [Gasps]



        

                       

    Oh, God, it's him.

    You have to stop him.



        

                       

    He said he was gonna kill me.

    You should just stop him.



        

                       

    Mr. Roth... Mr. Roth...

    Mr. Rothstein, wait a minute.



        

                       

    - Hold on a second. Hey.

    - [Engine Starts]



        

                       

    - [Ace] She's driving away.

    - [Officers]

    There's nothing we can do.



        

                       

    - There's nothing we can do.

    - Look, look, look.



        

                       

    You can't stop her for speeding?

    Look what she's doing.



        

                       

    - There's nothing we can do.

    She had the keys.

    - She's on the account.



        

                       

    - Let's pull her over

    at that Citgo station.

    - Okay. Let's do it.



        

                       

    [Siren Wailing]



        

                       

    - We're placing you under arrest for...

    - For what?



        

                       

    - We're placing you under arrest

    for aiding and abetting...

    - For what?



        

                       

    - We're placing you under arrest

    for aiding and abetting...

    - But I'm just trying to leave.



        

                       

    [Ace Narrating] After all

    the threats and all the bullshit...



        

                       

    it turned out Ginger

    didn't tell them anything.



        

                       

    - But, by then, the Feds

    didn't need her anyway.

    - But it was mine.



        

                       

    - They had all the pieces they needed.

    - But I didn't do anything.



        

                       

    - Everybody began to tumble,

    one after the other, like dominoes.

    - F.B.I.! We have a warrant!



        

                       

    Between Piscano

    complaining on the wire...



        

                       

    between Nicky, Ginger,

    me and my license...



        

                       

    - Paradise. We managed

    to really fuck it all up.

    - [Doorbell Rings]



        

                       

    - Mom.

    - Yeah, someone's

    at the fuckin' door now.



        

                       

    F.B.I. We have

    a federal search warrant.



        

                       

    [Nicky Narrating]

    I got wind of the pinches

    coming down, so I took off.



        

                       

    Who needs to hang around

    for that bullshit?



        

                       

    - My name is Mark Casper.

    Special Agent F.B.I.

    - Yeah?



        

                       

    - Can I make a fuckin' phone call?

    - Hey, hold it a minute.



        

                       

    You can make a phone call, but you

    don't have to talk to us like that.



        

                       

    [Agent] Everybody,

    out of the room. Over to the alarm.



        

                       

    - [Nicky Narrating]

    They got almost everybody else.

    - [Agent] This area is seized!



        

                       

    - Get the master account list.

    - I want all those papers seized

    regardless of what they are.



        

                       

    [Men Chattering]



        

                       

    Put every box on the table.



        

                       

    Ah, yes. Here we are.

    Little craps figures. [Chuckling]



        

                       

    [Ace Narrating]

    Green? Don't even ask.



        

                       

    - $      of yours.

    - No, he didn't.

    That's why it wasn't valid.



        

                       

    I was being extorted. I'm willing

    to tell you whatever you want to know.



        

                       

    - I've got nothing to hide here.

    - [Nicky Narrating] Now for the best.



        

                       

    I couldn't believe this shit.

    Piscano's expense reports took the cake.



        

                       

    - Oh, this is good. Bingo.

    - He might as well have given them

    a fuckin' blueprint.



        

                       

    Everybody's names, addresses,

    dates, everything.



        

                       

    Look at this. Thank you so much,

    Mr. Piscano. How considerate of you.



        

                       

    - Those are my mother's books.

    - You're under arrest.



        

                       

    - [Nicky Narrating]

    What a fuckin' balloon-head.

    - What are you guys doing?



        

                       

    - Take it easy.

    - [Groans] Wait!



        

                       

    - Wait a minute! He's sick! Oh, God!

    - Move back.



        

                       

    - I think it's his heart!

    Oh, God! Is he breathing?

    - C.P.R. now!



        

                       

    [Ace Narrating]

    Poor Artie. He got so upset,

    he had a heart attack...



        

                       

    and dropped dead right

    in front of his wife.



        

                       

    - Calm down!

    - Artie! No, I won't calm down!



        

                       

    - He's my husband! Artie! Artie!

    - We can't help him if...



        

                       

    [Ace Narrating]

    And at the end of the day...



        

                       

    they finally came to see me

    with the pictures.



        

                       

    Why protect a friend

    who betrayed you like that?



        

                       

    [Ace Narrating]

    But I didn't want to look at them.



        

                       

    I didn't want to look at the guys

    who brought them either.



        

                       

    ["House of the Rising Sun"]



        

                       

    Your Honor, as you can see,

    my clients are elderly and infirm.



        

                       

    Any incarceration could

    pose a serious health risk.



        

                       

    [Nicky Narrating]

    When the bosses were arrested,

    some of them were so old...



        

                       

    they needed doctors

    at their arraignment.



        

                       

    [Lawyer] Pre-trial Services recommends

    that bail remain as presently set.



        

                       

    - We're going to take a recess.

    - [Nicky Narrating] When it looked

    like they could get...



        

                       

       years to life in prison

    just for skimmin' a casino...



        

                       

    sick or no fuckin' sick, you knew

    people were going to get clipped.



        

                       

    So, the day of the arraignment,

    they had this meeting right

    in the back of the courthouse.



        

                       

    See, when something like this happens,

    you know how things are gonna work out.



        

                       

    It's always better with no witnesses.

    So what about Andy?



        

                       

    He won't talk.

    Stone is a good kid.



        

                       

    Stand-up guy

    just like his old man.



        

                       

    That's the way I see it.



        

                       

    I agree. He's solid.

    He's a fuckin' Marine.



        

                       

    He's okay. He always was.

    Remo, what do you think?



        

                       

    Look... why take a chance?



        

                       

    At least, that's the way

    I feel about it.



        

                       

    Call Artie. Tell him,

    I don't care what...



        

                       

    - he's got to be in my office

    Thursday morning before   :  .

    - It's done.



        

                       

    It's terribly important. I gotta have

    a conversation with that guy...



        

                       

    [Firing Gun]



        

                       

    [Nicky Narrating]

    As much as they liked him,

    I mean, he wasn't one of us.



        

                       

    He wasn't Italian. As far as they knew,

    he could have talked.



        

                       

    Otherwise,

    Stoney might still be alive.



        

                       

    The first one to skip

    was John Nance.



        

                       

    He found a nice, warm,

    secluded place in Costa Rica.



        

                       

    - He thought nobody

    would find him there.

    - [Gunshots]



        

                       

    [Breaks Glass]



        

                       

    [Gunshots,

    Furniture Crashing]



        

                       

    [Nicky Narrating]

    But then his kid got nabbed

    by the Feds for drugs.



        

                       

    So, naturally,

    the bosses were afraid

    he'd come out of hiding...



        

                       

    just to save his kid

    and give them all up.



        

                       

    So...



        

                       

    Where you goin', jag-off?



        

                       

    [Nicky Narrating] But, anyway,

    they all had to follow.



        

                       

    - Everybody went down.

    - [Groans]



        

                       

    Fuck you.



        

                       

    [Nicky Narrating]

    Before you knew it...



        

                       

    anybody who knew anything

    wound up gettin' whacked.



        

                       

    - [Fires Gun]

    - [Groaning]



        

                       

    [Woman]

    Oh, no! No! No!



        

                       

    ["House Of The Rising Sun"

    Continues]



        

                       

    [Ace Narrating]

    After Ginger took off,

    she wasn't much help to anybody.



        

                       

    She found some pimps, lowlifes,

    druggies and bikers in L.A.



        

                       

    In a few months, they went through

    all the money and all the jewels.



        

                       

    [Groaning]



        

                       

    [Gasps]



        

                       

    [Ace Narrating]

    After they found her body...



        

                       

    I had a private doctor

    do another autopsy.



        

                       

    He said they gave her

    a hot dose.



        

                       

    In the end, all she had left was     

    in mint condition coins.



        

                       

    No matter what the Feds or the papers

    might have said about my car bombing...



        

                       

    it was amateur night,

    you could tell.



        

                       

    Whoever it was, they put

    the dynamite under the passenger side.



        

                       

    But what they didn't know,

    what nobody outside the factory knew...



        

                       

    was that that model car was made with

    a metal plate under the driver's seat.



        

                       

    It's the only thing

    that saved my life.



        

                       

    The bombing was never authorized,

    but I suspect I know who lit the fuse.



        

                       

    - [Man] Hey, Nicky.

    - [Ace Narrating]

    And so did the powers that be.



        

                       

    - How are you?

    - How you doin'?



        

                       

    [Nicky Narrating] It took months

    for everything to calm down.



        

                       

    But, finally,

    my guys got out on bail...



        

                       

    and the bosses wanted me to send

    my brother Dominick out to Vegas.



        

                       

    Always the dollars.

    Always the fuckin' dollars.



        

                       

    I mean, it was still way too hot

    for me to even go near Vegas.



        

                       

    So I set up a meeting

    with the guys way out in the sticks.



        

                       

    I didn't want my brother to get fucked

    around. I mean, what's right is right.



        

                       

    - They don't give a fuck about...

    - [Groans]



        

                       

    Holy fuckin'!



        

                       

    What the fuck...



        

                       

    Come on, motherfucker!



        

                       

    - [Yelling]

    - Tough guys!

    You and your fuckin' brother!



        

                       

    - [Nicky Gagging]

    - You fuckin' scumbags!

    No more!



        

                       

    - Frankie!

    - No more!

    You see? Watch!



        

                       

    [Men Shouting]



        

                       

    - Frankie! Frankie! You piece of shit!

    - Fuck you, you motherfucker!



        

                       

    [Nicky] Fuckin' punk,

    motherfucker! Piece of shit!



        

                       

    [Men Shouting]



        

                       

    No, no, no, no!



        

                       

    Take this motherfucker out!



        

                       

    [Men Continue Clubbing,

    Dominick Moaning]



        

                       

    Frankie, leave the kid alone.

    He's still breathing.



        

                       

    He's still breathing.

    Leave him alone. Frankie.



        

                       

    [Frankie Continues Clubbing]

    All right. Strip him.



        

                       

    [Nicky Crying] No balls.

    You got no fuckin' balls.



        

                       

    Ah, Dominick. Ah, Dom.



        

                       

    [Crying]



        

                       

    [Nicky]

    Dominick. Dominick.



        

                       

    [Sobbing] Dominick.



        

                       

    Oh, Dominick.



        

                       

    [Frankie]

    Come on, come on.



        

                       

    - Bury them?

    - Bury them.



        

                       

    - [Gasping]

    - [Ace Narrating] The word was out.



        

                       

    The bosses had enough of Nicky.

    They had enough.



        

                       

    How much were they gonna take? So they

    made an example of him and his brother.



        

                       

    - [Gasping]

    - They buried them

    while they were still breathing.



        

                       

    Mister, you all right?

    Watch out!



        

                       

    - Mister, you all right?

    - Yeah.



        

                       

    [Ace Narrating]

    They had other ideas for me.



        

                       

    [Sirens Blaring,

    Firemen Chattering]



        

                       

    [Chatter Continues]



        

                       

    [Fireman]

    We need some help over here!



        

                       

    - [Groans]

    - You sure are lucky, mister.



        

                       

    [Choir Singing]



        

                       

    [Choir Continues]



        

                       

    [Ace Narrating]

    The town will never be the same.



        

                       

    After the Tangiers,

    the big corporations took it all over.



        

                       

    Today it looks like Disneyland.



        

                       

    [Choir Continues]



        

                       

    [Ace Narrating] And while the kids

    play cardboard pirates...



        

                       

    Mommy and Daddy drop the house payments

    and Junior's college money...



        

                       

    on the poker slots.



        

                       

    In the old days, dealers knew your name,

    what you drank, what you played.



        

                       

    Today, it's like checkin'

    into an airport.



        

                       

    And if you order room service,

    you're lucky if you get it by Thursday.



        

                       

    Today it's all gone.

    You got a whale show up

    with four million in a suitcase...



        

                       

    and some   -year-old hotel school kid is

    gonna want his social security number.



        

                       

    After the Teamsters

    got knocked out of the box...



        

                       

    the corporations tore down practically

    every one of the old casinos.



        

                       

    And where did the money come

    from to rebuild the Pyramids?



        

                       

    Junk bonds.



        

                       

    Still not sure?



        

                       

    - [Bell Ringing]

    - Probable. Maybe questionable.



        

                       

    Let me know as soon

    as you can find out.



        

                       

    [Ace Narrating]

    But in the end, I wound up

    right back where I started.



        

                       

    I could still pick winners...



        

                       

    and I could still make money

    for all kinds of people back home.



        

                       

    And why mess up a good thing?



        

                       

    And that's that.



        

                       

    [Man]

    Sometimes I wonder why

    I spend the lonely nights



        

                       

    Dreaming of a song



        

                       

    The melody

    haunts my memory



        

                       

    And I am once again with you



        

                       

    When our love was new



        

                       

    And each kiss an inspiration



        

                       

    Ah, but that was long ago



        

                       

    And now my consolation



        

                       

    Is in the stardust of a song



        

                       

    Beside a garden wall



        

                       

    When stars were bright



        

                       

    And you were in my arms



        

                       

    The nightingale

    told his fairy tale



        

                       

    Of paradise



        

                       

    Where roses grew



        

                       

    Though I dream in vain



        

                       

    In my heart



        

                       

    It will remain



        

                       

    My stardust melody



        

                       

    The memory



        

                       

    Of love's refrain









     
    Special help by SergeiK
    LuciaLWSun, 05 May 2024 06:47
    actually what the fuck.
    TaruSun, 05 May 2024 06:46
    Bee Movie
    By Jerry Seinfeld

    NARRATOR:
    (Black screen with text; The sound of buzzing bees can be heard)
    According to all known laws
    of aviation,
     :
    there is no way a bee
    should be able to fly.
     :
    Its wings are too small to get
    its fat little body off the ground.
     :
    The bee, of course, flies anyway
     :
    because bees don't care
    what humans think is impossible.
    BARRY BENSON:
    (Barry is picking out a shirt)
    Yellow, black. Yellow, black.
    Yellow, black. Yellow, black.
     :
    Ooh, black and yellow!
    Let's shake it up a little.
    JANET BENSON:
    Barry! Breakfast is ready!
    BARRY:
    Coming!
     :
    Hang on a second.
    (Barry uses his antenna like a phone)
     :
    Hello?
    ADAM FLAYMAN:

    (Through phone)
    - Barry?
    BARRY:
    - Adam?
    ADAM:
    - Can you believe this is happening?
    BARRY:
    - I can't. I'll pick you up.
    (Barry flies down the stairs)
     :
    MARTIN BENSON:
    Looking sharp.
    JANET:
    Use the stairs. Your father
    paid good money for those.
    BARRY:
    Sorry. I'm excited.
    MARTIN:
    Here's the graduate.
    We're very proud of you, son.
     :
    A perfect report card, all B's.
    JANET:
    Very proud.
    (Rubs Barry's hair)
    BARRY=
    Ma! I got a thing going here.
    JANET:
    - You got lint on your fuzz.
    BARRY:
    - Ow! That's me!

    JANET:
    - Wave to us! We'll be in row 118,000.
    - Bye!
    (Barry flies out the door)
    JANET:
    Barry, I told you,
    stop flying in the house!
    (Barry drives through the hive,and is waved at by Adam who is reading a
    newspaper)
    BARRY==
    - Hey, Adam.
    ADAM:
    - Hey, Barry.
    (Adam gets in Barry's car)
     :
    - Is that fuzz gel?
    BARRY:
    - A little. Special day, graduation.
    ADAM:
    Never thought I'd make it.
    (Barry pulls away from the house and continues driving)
    BARRY:
    Three days grade school,
    three days high school...
    ADAM:
    Those were awkward.
    BARRY:
    Three days college. I'm glad I took
    a day and hitchhiked around the hive.
    ADAM==
    You did come back different.
    (Barry and Adam pass by Artie, who is jogging)
    ARTIE:
    - Hi, Barry!

    BARRY:
    - Artie, growing a mustache? Looks good.
    ADAM:
    - Hear about Frankie?
    BARRY:
    - Yeah.
    ADAM==
    - You going to the funeral?
    BARRY:
    - No, I'm not going to his funeral.
     :
    Everybody knows,
    sting someone, you die.
     :
    Don't waste it on a squirrel.
    Such a hothead.
    ADAM:
    I guess he could have
    just gotten out of the way.
    (The car does a barrel roll on the loop-shaped bridge and lands on the
    highway)
     :
    I love this incorporating
    an amusement park into our regular day.
    BARRY:
    I guess that's why they say we don't need vacations.
    (Barry parallel parks the car and together they fly over the graduating
    students)
    Boy, quite a bit of pomp...
    under the circumstances.
    (Barry and Adam sit down and put on their hats)
     :
    - Well, Adam, today we are men.

    ADAM:
    - We are!
    BARRY=
    - Bee-men.
    =ADAM=
    - Amen!
    BARRY AND ADAM:
    Hallelujah!
    (Barry and Adam both have a happy spasm)
    ANNOUNCER:
    Students, faculty, distinguished bees,
     :
    please welcome Dean Buzzwell.
    DEAN BUZZWELL:
    Welcome, New Hive Oity
    graduating class of...
     :
    ...9:
     :
    That concludes our ceremonies.
     :
    And begins your career
    at Honex Industries!
    ADAM:
    Will we pick our job today?
    (Adam and Barry get into a tour bus)
    BARRY=
    I heard it's just orientation.
    (Tour buses rise out of the ground and the students are automatically
    loaded into the buses)
    TOUR GUIDE:
    Heads up! Here we go.

    ANNOUNCER:
    Keep your hands and antennas
    inside the tram at all times.
    BARRY:
    - Wonder what it'll be like?
    ADAM:
    - A little scary.
    TOUR GUIDE==
    Welcome to Honex,
    a division of Honesco
     :
    and a part of the Hexagon Group.
    Barry:
    This is it!
    BARRY AND ADAM:
    Wow.
    BARRY:
    Wow.
    (The bus drives down a road an on either side are the Bee's massive
    complicated Honey-making machines)
    TOUR GUIDE:
    We know that you, as a bee,
    have worked your whole life
     :
    to get to the point where you
    can work for your whole life.
     :
    Honey begins when our valiant Pollen
    Jocks bring the nectar to the hive.
     :
    Our top-secret formula
     :
    is automatically color-corrected,

    scent-adjusted and bubble-contoured
     :
    into this soothing sweet syrup
     :
    with its distinctive
    golden glow you know as...
    EVERYONE ON BUS:
    Honey!
    (The guide has been collecting honey into a bottle and she throws it into
    the crowd on the bus and it is caught by a girl in the back)
    ADAM:
    - That girl was hot.
    BARRY:
    - She's my cousin!
    ADAM==
    - She is?
    BARRY:
    - Yes, we're all cousins.
    ADAM:
    - Right. You're right.
    TOUR GUIDE:
    - At Honex, we constantly strive
     :
    to improve every aspect
    of bee existence.
     :
    These bees are stress-testing
    a new helmet technology.
    (The bus passes by a Bee wearing a helmet who is being smashed into the
    ground with fly-swatters, newspapers and boots. He lifts a thumbs up but
    you can hear him groan)
     :
    ADAM==

    - What do you think he makes?
    BARRY:
    - Not enough.
    TOUR GUIDE:
    Here we have our latest advancement,
    the Krelman.
    (They pass by a turning wheel with Bees standing on pegs, who are each
    wearing a finger-shaped hat)
    Barry:
    - Wow, What does that do?
    TOUR GUIDE:
    - Catches that little strand of honey
     :
    that hangs after you pour it.
    Saves us millions.
    ADAM:
    (Intrigued)
    Can anyone work on the Krelman?
    TOUR GUIDE:
    Of course. Most bee jobs are
    small ones.
    But bees know that every small job,
    if it's done well, means a lot.
     :
    But choose carefully
     :
    because you'll stay in the job
    you pick for the rest of your life.
    (Everyone claps except for Barry)
    BARRY:
    The same job the rest of your life?
    I didn't know that.
    ADAM:

    What's the difference?
    TOUR GUIDE:
    You'll be happy to know that bees,
    as a species, haven't had one day off
     :
    in 27 million years.
    BARRY:
    (Upset)
    So you'll just work us to death?
     :
    We'll sure try.
    (Everyone on the bus laughs except Barry. Barry and Adam are walking back
    home together)
    ADAM:
    Wow! That blew my mind!
    BARRY:
    "What's the difference?"
    How can you say that?
     :
    One job forever?
    That's an insane choice to have to make.
    ADAM:
    I'm relieved. Now we only have
    to make one decision in life.
    BARRY:
    But, Adam, how could they
    never have told us that?
    ADAM:
    Why would you question anything?
    We're bees.
     :
    We're the most perfectly
    functioning society on Earth.

    BARRY:
    You ever think maybe things
    work a little too well here?
    ADAM:
    Like what? Give me one example.
    (Barry and Adam stop walking and it is revealed to the audience that
    hundreds of cars are speeding by and narrowly missing them in perfect
    unison)
    BARRY:
    I don't know. But you know
    what I'm talking about.
    ANNOUNCER:
    Please clear the gate.
    Royal Nectar Force on approach.
    BARRY:
    Wait a second. Check it out.
    (The Pollen jocks fly in, circle around and landing in line)
     :
    - Hey, those are Pollen Jocks!
    ADAM:
    - Wow.
     :
    I've never seen them this close.
    BARRY:
    They know what it's like
    outside the hive.
    ADAM:
    Yeah, but some don't come back.
    GIRL BEES:
    - Hey, Jocks!
    - Hi, Jocks!
    (The Pollen Jocks hook up their backpacks to machines that pump the nectar
    to trucks, which drive away)

    LOU LO DUVA:
    You guys did great!
     :
    You're monsters!
    You're sky freaks!
    I love it!
    (Punching the Pollen Jocks in joy)
    I love it!
    ADAM:
    - I wonder where they were.
    BARRY:
    - I don't know.
     :
    Their day's not planned.
     :
    Outside the hive, flying who knows
    where, doing who knows what.
     :
    You can't just decide to be a Pollen
    Jock. You have to be bred for that.
    ADAM==
    Right.
    (Barry and Adam are covered in some pollen that floated off of the Pollen
    Jocks)
    BARRY:
    Look at that. That's more pollen
    than you and I will see in a lifetime.
    ADAM:
    It's just a status symbol.
    Bees make too much of it.
    BARRY:
    Perhaps. Unless you're wearing it
    and the ladies see you wearing it.
    (Barry waves at 2 girls standing a little away from them)

    ADAM==
    Those ladies?
    Aren't they our cousins too?
    BARRY:
    Distant. Distant.
    POLLEN JOCK #1:
    Look at these two.
    POLLEN JOCK #2:
    - Couple of Hive Harrys.
    POLLEN JOCK #1:
    - Let's have fun with them.
    GIRL BEE #1:
    It must be dangerous
    being a Pollen Jock.
    BARRY:
    Yeah. Once a bear pinned me
    against a mushroom!
     :
    He had a paw on my throat,
    and with the other, he was slapping me!
    (Slaps Adam with his hand to represent his scenario)
    GIRL BEE #2:
    - Oh, my!
    BARRY:
    - I never thought I'd knock him out.
    GIRL BEE #1:
    (Looking at Adam)
    What were you doing during this?
    ADAM:
    Obviously I was trying to alert the authorities.
    BARRY:
    I can autograph that.

    (The pollen jocks walk up to Barry and Adam, they pretend that Barry and
    Adam really are pollen jocks.)
    POLLEN JOCK #1:
    A little gusty out there today,
    wasn't it, comrades?
    BARRY:
    Yeah. Gusty.
    POLLEN JOCK #1:
    We're hitting a sunflower patch
    six miles from here tomorrow.
    BARRY:
    - Six miles, huh?
    ADAM:
    - Barry!
    POLLEN JOCK #2:
    A puddle jump for us,
    but maybe you're not up for it.
    BARRY:
    - Maybe I am.
    ADAM:
    - You are not!
    POLLEN JOCK #1:
    We're going 0900 at J-Gate.
     :
    What do you think, buzzy-boy?
    Are you bee enough?
    BARRY:
    I might be. It all depends
    on what 0900 means.
    (The scene cuts to Barry looking out on the hive-city from his balcony at
    night)
    MARTIN:

    Hey, Honex!
    BARRY:
    Dad, you surprised me.
    MARTIN:
    You decide what you're interested in?
    BARRY:
    - Well, there's a lot of choices.
    - But you only get one.
     :
    Do you ever get bored
    doing the same job every day?
    MARTIN:
    Son, let me tell you about stirring.
     :
    You grab that stick, and you just
    move it around, and you stir it around.
     :
    You get yourself into a rhythm.
    It's a beautiful thing.
    BARRY:
    You know, Dad,
    the more I think about it,
     :
    maybe the honey field
    just isn't right for me.
    MARTIN:
    You were thinking of what,
    making balloon animals?
     :
    That's a bad job
    for a guy with a stinger.
     :

    Janet, your son's not sure
    he wants to go into honey!
    JANET:
    - Barry, you are so funny sometimes.
    BARRY:
    - I'm not trying to be funny.
    MARTIN:
    You're not funny! You're going
    into honey. Our son, the stirrer!
    JANET:
    - You're gonna be a stirrer?
    BARRY:
    - No one's listening to me!
    MARTIN:
    Wait till you see the sticks I have.
    BARRY:
    I could say anything right now.
    I'm gonna get an ant tattoo!
    (Barry's parents don't listen to him and continue to ramble on)
    MARTIN:
    Let's open some honey and celebrate!
    BARRY:
    Maybe I'll pierce my thorax.
    Shave my antennae.
     :
    Shack up with a grasshopper. Get
    a gold tooth and call everybody "dawg"!
    JANET:
    I'm so proud.
    (The scene cuts to Barry and Adam waiting in line to get a job)
    ADAM:
    - We're starting work today!

    BARRY:
    - Today's the day.
    ADAM:
    Come on! All the good jobs
    will be gone.
    BARRY:
    Yeah, right.
    JOB LISTER:
    Pollen counting, stunt bee, pouring,
    stirrer, front desk, hair removal...
    BEE IN FRONT OF LINE:
    - Is it still available?
    JOB LISTER:
    - Hang on. Two left!
     :
    One of them's yours! Congratulations!
    Step to the side.
    ADAM:
    - What'd you get?
    BEE IN FRONT OF LINE:
    - Picking crud out. Stellar!
    (He walks away)
    ADAM:
    Wow!
    JOB LISTER:
    Couple of newbies?
    ADAM:
    Yes, sir! Our first day! We are ready!
    JOB LISTER:
    Make your choice.
    (Adam and Barry look up at the job board. There are hundreds of constantly
    changing panels that contain available or unavailable jobs. It looks very
    confusing)

    ADAM:
    - You want to go first?
    BARRY:
    - No, you go.
    ADAM:
    Oh, my. What's available?
    JOB LISTER:
    Restroom attendant's open,
    not for the reason you think.
    ADAM:
    - Any chance of getting the Krelman?
    JOB LISTER:
    - Sure, you're on.
    (Puts the Krelman finger-hat on Adam's head)
    (Suddenly the sign for Krelman closes out)
     :
    I'm sorry, the Krelman just closed out.
    (Takes Adam's hat off)
    Wax monkey's always open.
    ADAM:
    The Krelman opened up again.
     :
    What happened?
    JOB LISTER:
    A bee died. Makes an opening. See?
    He's dead. Another dead one.
     :
    Deady. Deadified. Two more dead.
     :
    Dead from the neck up.
    Dead from the neck down. That's life!

    ADAM:
    Oh, this is so hard!
    (Barry remembers what the Pollen Jock offered him and he flies off)
    Heating, cooling,
    stunt bee, pourer, stirrer,
     :
    humming, inspector number seven,
    lint coordinator, stripe supervisor,
     :
    mite wrangler. Barry, what
    do you think I should... Barry?
    (Adam turns around and sees Barry flying away)
     :
    Barry!
    POLLEN JOCK:
    All right, we've got the sunflower patch
    in quadrant nine...
    ADAM:
    (Through phone)
    What happened to you?
    Where are you?
    BARRY:
    - I'm going out.
    ADAM:
    - Out? Out where?
    BARRY:
    - Out there.
    ADAM:
    - Oh, no!
    BARRY:
    I have to, before I go
    to work for the rest of my life.
    ADAM:

    You're gonna die! You're crazy!
    (Barry hangs up)
    Hello?
    POLLEN JOCK #2:
    Another call coming in.
     :
    If anyone's feeling brave,
    there's a Korean deli on 83rd
     :
    that gets their roses today.
    BARRY:
    Hey, guys.
    POLLEN JOCK #1 ==
    - Look at that.
    POLLEN JOCK #2:
    - Isn't that the kid we saw yesterday?
    LOU LO DUVA:
    Hold it, son, flight deck's restricted.
    POLLEN JOCK #1:
    It's OK, Lou. We're gonna take him up.
    (Puts hand on Barry's shoulder)
    LOU LO DUVA:
    (To Barry) Really? Feeling lucky, are you?
    BEE WITH CLIPBOARD:
    (To Barry) Sign here, here. Just initial that.
     :
    - Thank you.
    LOU LO DUVA:
    - OK.
     :
    You got a rain advisory today,
     :

    and as you all know,
    bees cannot fly in rain.
     :
    So be careful. As always,
    watch your brooms,
     :
    hockey sticks, dogs,
    birds, bears and bats.
     :
    Also, I got a couple of reports
    of root beer being poured on us.
     :
    Murphy's in a home because of it,
    babbling like a cicada!
    BARRY:
    - That's awful.
    LOU LO DUVA:
    (Still talking through megaphone)
    - And a reminder for you rookies,
     :
    bee law number one,
    absolutely no talking to humans!
     :
    All right, launch positions!
    POLLEN JOCKS:
    (The Pollen Jocks run into formation)
     :
    Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz! Buzz, buzz,
    buzz, buzz! Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz!
    LOU LU DUVA:
    Black and yellow!
    POLLEN JOCKS:

    Hello!
    POLLEN JOCK #1:
    (To Barry)You ready for this, hot shot?
    BARRY:
    Yeah. Yeah, bring it on.
    POLLEN JOCK's:
    Wind, check.
     :
    - Antennae, check.
    - Nectar pack, check.
     :
    - Wings, check.
    - Stinger, check.
    BARRY:
    Scared out of my shorts, check.
    LOU LO DUVA:
    OK, ladies,
     :
    let's move it out!
     :
    Pound those petunias,
    you striped stem-suckers!
     :
    All of you, drain those flowers!
    (The pollen jocks fly out of the hive)
    BARRY:
    Wow! I'm out!
     :
    I can't believe I'm out!
     :
    So blue.

     :
    I feel so fast and free!
     :
    Box kite!
    (Barry flies through the kite)
     :
    Wow!
     :
    Flowers!
    (A pollen jock puts on some high tech goggles that shows flowers similar to
    heat sink goggles.)
    POLLEN JOCK:
    This is Blue Leader.
    We have roses visual.
     :
    Bring it around 30 degrees and hold.
     :
    Roses!
    POLLEN JOCK #1:
    30 degrees, roger. Bringing it around.
     :
    Stand to the side, kid.
    It's got a bit of a kick.
    (The pollen jock fires a high-tech gun at the flower, shooting tubes that
    suck up the nectar from the flower and collects it into a pouch on the gun)
    BARRY:
    That is one nectar collector!
    POLLEN JOCK #1==
    - Ever see pollination up close?
    BARRY:
    - No, sir.
    POLLEN JOCK #1:

    (Barry and the Pollen jock fly over the field, the pollen jock sprinkles
    pollen as he goes)
     :
    I pick up some pollen here, sprinkle it
    over here. Maybe a dash over there,
     :
    a pinch on that one.
    See that? It's a little bit of magic.
    BARRY:
    That's amazing. Why do we do that?
    POLLEN JOCK #1:
    That's pollen power. More pollen, more
    flowers, more nectar, more honey for us.
    BARRY:
    Cool.
    POLLEN JOCK #1:
    I'm picking up a lot of bright yellow.
    could be daisies. Don't we need those?
    POLLEN JOCK #2:
    Copy that visual.
     :
    Wait. One of these flowers
    seems to be on the move.
    POLLEN JOCK #1:
    Say again? You're reporting
    a moving flower?
    POLLEN JOCK #2:
    Affirmative.
    (The Pollen jocks land near the "flowers" which, to the audience are
    obviously just tennis balls)
    KEN:
    (In the distance) That was on the line!

    POLLEN JOCK #1:
    This is the coolest. What is it?
    POLLEN JOCK #2:
    I don't know, but I'm loving this color.
     :
    It smells good.
    Not like a flower, but I like it.
    POLLEN JOCK #1:
    Yeah, fuzzy.
    (Sticks his hand on the ball but it gets stuck)
    POLLEN JOCK #3==
    Chemical-y.
    (The pollen jock finally gets his hand free from the tennis ball)
    POLLEN JOCK #1:
    Careful, guys. It's a little grabby.
    (The pollen jocks turn around and see Barry lying his entire body on top of
    one of the tennis balls)
    POLLEN JOCK #2:
    My sweet lord of bees!
    POLLEN JOCK #3:
    Candy-brain, get off there!
    POLLEN JOCK #1:
    (Pointing upwards)
    Problem!
    (A human hand reaches down and grabs the tennis ball that Barry is stuck
    to)
    BARRY:
    - Guys!
    POLLEN JOCK #2:
    - This could be bad.
    POLLEN JOCK #3:
    Affirmative.
    (Vanessa Bloome starts bouncing the tennis ball, not knowing Barry is stick
    to it)

    BARRY==
    Very close.
     :
    Gonna hurt.
     :
    Mama's little boy.
    (Barry is being hit back and forth by two humans playing tennis. He is
    still stuck to the ball)
    POLLEN JOCK #1:
    You are way out of position, rookie!
    KEN:
    Coming in at you like a MISSILE!
    (Barry flies past the pollen jocks, still stuck to the ball)
    BARRY:
    (In slow motion)
    Help me!
    POLLEN JOCK #2:
    I don't think these are flowers.
    POLLEN JOCK #3:
    - Should we tell him?
    POLLEN JOCK #1:
    - I think he knows.
    BARRY:
    What is this?!
    KEN:
    Match point!
     :
    You can start packing up, honey,
    because you're about to EAT IT!
    (A pollen jock coughs which confused Ken and he hits the ball the wrong way
    with Barry stuck to it and it goes flying into the city)
    BARRY:

    Yowser!
    (Barry bounces around town and gets stuck in the engine of a car. He flies
    into the air conditioner and sees a bug that was frozen in there)
    BARRY:
    Ew, gross.
    (The man driving the car turns on the air conditioner which blows Barry
    into the car)
    GIRL IN CAR:
    There's a bee in the car!
     :
    - Do something!
    DAD DRIVING CAR:
    - I'm driving!
    BABY GIRL:
    (Waving at Barry)
    - Hi, bee.
    (Barry smiles and waves at the baby girl)
    GUY IN BACK OF CAR:
    - He's back here!
     :
    He's going to sting me!
    GIRL IN CAR:
    Nobody move. If you don't move,
    he won't sting you. Freeze!
    (Barry freezes as well, hovering in the middle of the car)
     :
    GRANDMA IN CAR==
    He blinked!
    (The grandma whips out some bee-spray and sprays everywhere in the car,
    climbing into the front seat, still trying to spray Barry)
    GIRL IN CAR:
    Spray him, Granny!
    DAD DRIVING THE CAR:
    What are you doing?!
    (Barry escapes the car through the air conditioner and is flying high above

    the ground, safe.)
    BARRY:
    Wow... the tension level
    out here is unbelievable.
    (Barry sees that storm clouds are gathering and he can see rain clouds
    moving into this direction)
     :
    I gotta get home.
     :
    Can't fly in rain.
     :
    Can't fly in rain.
    (A rain drop hits Barry and one of his wings is damaged)
     :
    Can't fly in rain.
    (A second rain drop hits Barry again and he spirals downwards)
    Mayday! Mayday! Bee going down!
    (WW2 plane sound effects are played as he plummets, and he crash-lands on a
    plant inside an apartment near the window)
    VANESSA BLOOME:
    Ken, could you close
    the window please?
    KEN==
    Hey, check out my new resume.
    I made it into a fold-out brochure.
     :
    You see?
    (Folds brochure resume out)
    Folds out.
    (Ken closes the window, trapping Barry inside)
    BARRY:
    Oh, no. More humans. I don't need this.
    (Barry tries to fly away but smashes into the window and falls again)
     :
    What was that?

    (Barry keeps trying to fly out the window but he keeps being knocked back
    because the window is closed)
    Maybe this time. This time. This time.
    This time! This time! This...
     :
    Drapes!
    (Barry taps the glass. He doesn't understand what it is)
    That is diabolical.
    KEN:
    It's fantastic. It's got all my special
    skills, even my top-ten favorite movies.
    ANDY:
    What's number one? Star Wars?
    KEN:
    Nah, I don't go for that...
    (Ken makes finger guns and makes "pew pew pew" sounds and then stops)
     :
    ...kind of stuff.
    BARRY:
    No wonder we shouldn't talk to them.
    They're out of their minds.
    KEN:
    When I leave a job interview, they're
    flabbergasted, can't believe what I say.
    BARRY:
    (Looking at the light on the ceiling)
    There's the sun. Maybe that's a way out.
    (Starts flying towards the lightbulb)
     :
    I don't remember the sun
    having a big 75 on it.
    (Barry hits the lightbulb and falls into the dip on the table that the
    humans are sitting at)
    KEN:

    I predicted global warming.
     :
    I could feel it getting hotter.
    At first I thought it was just me.
    (Andy dips a chip into the bowl and scoops up some dip with Barry on it and
    is about to put it in his mouth)
     :
    Wait! Stop! Bee!
    (Andy drops the chip with Barry in fear and backs away. All the humans
    freak out)
     :
    Stand back. These are winter boots.
    (Ken has winter boots on his hands and he is about to smash the bee but
    Vanessa saves him last second)
    VANESSA:
    Wait!
     :
    Don't kill him!
    (Vanessa puts Barry in a glass to protect him)
    KEN:
    You know I'm allergic to them!
    This thing could kill me!
    VANESSA:
    Why does his life have
    less value than yours?
    KEN:
    Why does his life have any less value
    than mine? Is that your statement?
    VANESSA:
    I'm just saying all life has value. You
    don't know what he's capable of feeling.
    (Vanessa picks up Ken's brochure and puts it under the glass so she can
    carry Barry back to the window. Barry looks at Vanessa in amazement)
    KEN:

    My brochure!
    VANESSA:
    There you go, little guy.
    (Vanessa opens the window and lets Barry out but Barry stays back and is
    still shocked that a human saved his life)
    KEN:
    I'm not scared of him.
    It's an allergic thing.
    VANESSA:
    Put that on your resume brochure.
    KEN:
    My whole face could puff up.
    ANDY:
    Make it one of your special skills.
    KEN:
    Knocking someone out
    is also a special skill.
    (Ken walks to the door)
    Right. Bye, Vanessa. Thanks.
     :
    - Vanessa, next week? Yogurt night?
    VANESSA:
    - Sure, Ken. You know, whatever.
     :
    (Vanessa tries to close door)
    KEN==
    - You could put carob chips on there.
    VANESSA:
    - Bye.
    (Closes door but Ken opens it again)
    KEN:
    - Supposed to be less calories.

    VANESSA:
    - Bye.
    (Closes door)
    (Fast forward to the next day, Barry is still inside the house. He flies
    into the kitchen where Vanessa is doing dishes)
    BARRY==
    (Talking to himself)
    I gotta say something.
     :
    She saved my life.
    I gotta say something.
     :
    All right, here it goes.
    (Turns back)
    Nah.
     :
    What would I say?
     :
    I could really get in trouble.
     :
    It's a bee law.
    You're not supposed to talk to a human.
     :
    I can't believe I'm doing this.
     :
    I've got to.
    (Barry disguises himself as a character on a food can as Vanessa walks by
    again)
     :
    Oh, I can't do it. Come on!
     :
    No. Yes. No.
     :
    Do it. I can't.

     :
    How should I start it?
    (Barry strikes a pose and wiggles his eyebrows)
    "You like jazz?"
    No, that's no good.
    (Vanessa is about to walk past Barry)
    Here she comes! Speak, you fool!
     :
    ...Hi!
    (Vanessa gasps and drops the dishes in fright and notices Barry on the
    counter)
     :
    I'm sorry.
    VANESSA:
    - You're talking.
    BARRY:
    - Yes, I know.
    VANESSA:
    (Pointing at Barry)
    You're talking!
    BARRY:
    I'm so sorry.
    VANESSA:
    No, it's OK. It's fine.
    I know I'm dreaming.
     :
    But I don't recall going to bed.
    BARRY:
    Well, I'm sure this
    is very disconcerting.
    VANESSA:
    This is a bit of a surprise to me.
    I mean, you're a bee!

    BARRY:
    I am. And I'm not supposed
    to be doing this,
    (Pointing to the living room where Ken tried to kill him last night)
    but they were all trying to kill me.
     :
    And if it wasn't for you...
     :
    I had to thank you.
    It's just how I was raised.
    (Vanessa stabs her hand with a fork to test whether she's dreaming or not)
     :
    That was a little weird.
    VANESSA:
    - I'm talking with a bee.
    BARRY:
    - Yeah.
    VANESSA:
    I'm talking to a bee.
    And the bee is talking to me!
    BARRY:
    I just want to say I'm grateful.
    I'll leave now.
    (Barry turns to leave)
    VANESSA:
    - Wait! How did you learn to do that?
    BARRY:
    (Flying back)
    - What?
    VANESSA:
    The talking...thing.
    BARRY:

    Same way you did, I guess.
    "Mama, Dada, honey." You pick it up.
    VANESSA:
    - That's very funny.
    BARRY:
    - Yeah.
     :
    Bees are funny. If we didn't laugh,
    we'd cry with what we have to deal with.
     :
    Anyway...
    VANESSA:
    Can I...
     :
    ...get you something?
    BARRY:
    - Like what?
    VANESSA:
    I don't know. I mean...
    I don't know. Coffee?
    BARRY:
    I don't want to put you out.
    VANESSA:
    It's no trouble. It takes two minutes.
     :
    - It's just coffee.
    BARRY:
    - I hate to impose.
    (Vanessa starts making coffee)
    VANESSA:
    - Don't be ridiculous!

    BARRY:
    - Actually, I would love a cup.
    VANESSA:
    Hey, you want rum cake?
    BARRY:
    - I shouldn't.
    VANESSA:
    - Have some.
    BARRY:
    - No, I can't.
    VANESSA:
    - Come on!
    BARRY:
    I'm trying to lose a couple micrograms.
    VANESSA:
    - Where?
    BARRY:
    - These stripes don't help.
    VANESSA:
    You look great!
    BARRY:
    I don't know if you know
    anything about fashion.
     :
    Are you all right?
    VANESSA:
    (Pouring coffee on the floor and missing the cup completely)
    No.
    (Flash forward in time. Barry and Vanessa are sitting together at a table
    on top of the apartment building drinking coffee)

     :
    BARRY==
    He's making the tie in the cab
    as they're flying up Madison.
     :
    He finally gets there.
     :
    He runs up the steps into the church.
    The wedding is on.
     :
    And he says, "Watermelon?
    I thought you said Guatemalan.
     :
    Why would I marry a watermelon?"
    (Barry laughs but Vanessa looks confused)
    VANESSA:
    Is that a bee joke?
    BARRY:
    That's the kind of stuff we do.
    VANESSA:
    Yeah, different.
     :
    So, what are you gonna do, Barry?
    (Barry stands on top of a sugar cube floating in his coffee and paddles it
    around with a straw like it's a gondola)
    BARRY:
    About work? I don't know.
     :
    I want to do my part for the hive,
    but I can't do it the way they want.
    VANESSA:
    I know how you feel.

    BARRY:
    - You do?
    VANESSA:
    - Sure.
     :
    My parents wanted me to be a lawyer or
    a doctor, but I wanted to be a florist.
    BARRY:
    - Really?
    VANESSA:
    - My only interest is flowers.
    BARRY:
    Our new queen was just elected
    with that same campaign slogan.
     :
    Anyway, if you look...
    (Barry points to a tree in the middle of Central Park)
     :
    There's my hive right there. See it?
    VANESSA:
    You're in Sheep Meadow!
    BARRY:
    Yes! I'm right off the Turtle Pond!
    VANESSA:
    No way! I know that area.
    I lost a toe ring there once.
    BARRY:
    - Why do girls put rings on their toes?
    VANESSA:
    - Why not?
    BARRY:

    - It's like putting a hat on your knee.
    VANESSA:
    - Maybe I'll try that.
    (A custodian installing a lightbulb looks over at them but to his
    perspective it looks like Vanessa is talking to a cup of coffee on the
    table)
    CUSTODIAN:
    - You all right, ma'am?
    VANESSA:
    - Oh, yeah. Fine.
     :
    Just having two cups of coffee!
    BARRY:
    Anyway, this has been great.
    Thanks for the coffee.
    VANESSA==
    Yeah, it's no trouble.
    BARRY:
    Sorry I couldn't finish it. If I did,
    I'd be up the rest of my life.
    (Barry points towards the rum cake)
     :
    Can I take a piece of this with me?
    VANESSA:
    Sure! Here, have a crumb.
    (Vanessa hands Barry a crumb but it is still pretty big for Barry)
    BARRY:
    - Thanks!
    VANESSA:
    - Yeah.
    BARRY:
    All right. Well, then...
    I guess I'll see you around.

     :
    Or not.
    VANESSA:
    OK, Barry...
    BARRY:
    And thank you
    so much again... for before.
    VANESSA:
    Oh, that? That was nothing.
    BARRY:
    Well, not nothing, but... Anyway...
    (Vanessa and Barry hold hands, but Vanessa has to hold out a finger because
    her hands is to big and Barry holds that)
    (The custodian looks over again and it appears Vanessa is laughing at her
    coffee again. The lightbulb that he was screwing in sparks and he falls off
    the ladder)
    (Fast forward in time and we see two Bee Scientists testing out a parachute
    in a Honex wind tunnel)
    BEE SCIENTIST #1:
    This can't possibly work.
    BEE SCIENTIST #2:
    He's all set to go.
    We may as well try it.
     :
    OK, Dave, pull the chute.
    (Dave pulls the chute and the wind slams him against the wall and he falls
    on his face.The camera pans over and we see Barry and Adam walking
    together)
    ADAM:
    - Sounds amazing.
    BARRY:
    - It was amazing!
     :
    It was the scariest,
    happiest moment of my life.

    ADAM:
    Humans! I can't believe
    you were with humans!
     :
    Giant, scary humans!
    What were they like?
    BARRY:
    Huge and crazy. They talk crazy.
     :
    They eat crazy giant things.
    They drive crazy.
    ADAM:
    - Do they try and kill you, like on TV?
    BARRY:
    - Some of them. But some of them don't.
    ADAM:
    - How'd you get back?
    BARRY:
    - Poodle.
    ADAM:
    You did it, and I'm glad. You saw
    whatever you wanted to see.
     :
    You had your "experience." Now you
    can pick out your job and be normal.
    BARRY:
    - Well...
    ADAM:
    - Well?
    BARRY:
    Well, I met someone.

    ADAM:
    You did? Was she Bee-ish?
     :
    - A wasp?! Your parents will kill you!
    BARRY:
    - No, no, no, not a wasp.
    ADAM:
    - Spider?
    BARRY:
    - I'm not attracted to spiders.
     :
    I know, for everyone else, it's the hottest thing,
    with the eight legs and all.
     :
    I can't get by that face.
    ADAM:
    So who is she?
    BARRY:
    She's... human.
    ADAM:
    No, no. That's a bee law.
    You wouldn't break a bee law.
    BARRY:
    - Her name's Vanessa.
    (Adam puts his head in his hands)
    ADAM:
    - Oh, boy.
    BARRY==
    She's so nice. And she's a florist!
    ADAM:
    Oh, no! You're dating a human florist!

    BARRY:
    We're not dating.
    ADAM:
    You're flying outside the hive, talking
    to humans that attack our homes
     :
    with power washers and M-80s!
    That's one-eighth a stick of dynamite!
    BARRY:
    She saved my life!
    And she understands me.
    ADAM:
    This is over!
    BARRY:
    Eat this.
    (Barry gives Adam a piece of the crumb that he got from Vanessa. Adam eats
    it)
    ADAM:
    (Adam's tone changes)
    This is not over! What was that?
    BARRY:
    - They call it a crumb.
    ADAM:
    - It was so stingin' stripey!
    BARRY:
    And that's not what they eat.
    That's what falls off what they eat!
     :
    - You know what a Cinnabon is?
    ADAM:
    - No.
    (Adam opens a door behind him and he pulls Barry in)

    BARRY:
    It's bread and cinnamon and frosting.
    ADAM:
    Be quiet!
    BARRY:
    They heat it up...
    ADAM:
    Sit down!
    (Adam forces Barry to sit down)
    BARRY:
    (Still rambling about Cinnabons)
    ...really hot!
    (Adam grabs Barry by the shoulders)
    ADAM:
    - Listen to me!
     :
    We are not them! We're us.
    There's us and there's them!
    BARRY==
    Yes, but who can deny
    the heart that is yearning?
    ADAM:
    There's no yearning.
    Stop yearning. Listen to me!
     :
    You have got to start thinking bee,
    my friend. Thinking bee!
    BARRY:
    - Thinking bee.
    WORKER BEE:
    - Thinking bee.
    WORKER BEES AND ADAM:
    Thinking bee! Thinking bee!

    Thinking bee! Thinking bee!
    (Flash forward in time; Barry is laying on a raft in a pool full of honey.
    He is wearing sunglasses)
    JANET:
    There he is. He's in the pool.
    MARTIN:
    You know what your problem is, Barry?
    (Barry pulls down his sunglasses and he looks annoyed)
    BARRY:
    (Sarcastic)
    I gotta start thinking bee?
    JANET:
    How much longer will this go on?
    MARTIN:
    It's been three days!
    Why aren't you working?
    (Puts sunglasses back on)
    BARRY:
    I've got a lot of big life decisions
    to think about.
    MARTIN:
    What life? You have no life!
    You have no job. You're barely a bee!
    JANET:
    Would it kill you
    to make a little honey?
    (Barry rolls off the raft and sinks into the honey pool)
     :
    Barry, come out.
    Your father's talking to you.
     :
    Martin, would you talk to him?
    MARTIN:

    Barry, I'm talking to you!
    (Barry keeps sinking into the honey until he is suddenly in Central Park
    having a picnic with Vanessa)
    (Barry has a cup of honey and he clinks his glass with Vanessas. Suddenly a
    mosquito lands on Vanessa and she slaps it, killing it. They both gasp but
    then burst out laughing)
    VANESSA:
    You coming?
    (The camera pans over and Vanessa is climbing into a small yellow airplane)
    BARRY:
    Got everything?
    VANESSA:
    All set!
    BARRY:
    Go ahead. I'll catch up.
    (Vanessa lifts off and flies ahead)
    VANESSA:
    Don't be too long.
    (Barry catches up with Vanessa and he sticks out his arms like ana irplane.
    He rolls from side to side, and Vanessa copies him with the airplane)
    VANESSA:
    Watch this!
    (Barry stays back and watches as Vanessa draws a heart in the air using
    pink smoke from the plane, but on the last loop-the-loop she suddenly
    crashes into a mountain and the plane explodes. The destroyed plane falls
    into some rocks and explodes a second time)
    BARRY:
    Vanessa!
    (As Barry is yelling his mouth fills with honey and he wakes up,
    discovering that he was just day dreaming. He slowly sinks back into the
    honey pool)
    MARTIN:
    - We're still here.

    JANET:
    - I told you not to yell at him.
     :
    He doesn't respond to yelling!
    MARTIN:
    - Then why yell at me?
    JANET:
    - Because you don't listen!
    MARTIN:
    I'm not listening to this.
    BARRY:
    Sorry, I've gotta go.
    MARTIN:
    - Where are you going?
    BARRY:
    - I'm meeting a friend.
    JANET:
    A girl? Is this why you can't decide?
    BARRY:
    Bye.
    (Barry flies out the door and Martin shakes his head)
     :
    JANET==
    I just hope she's Bee-ish.
    (Fast forward in time and Barry is sitting on Vanessa's shoulder and she is
    closing up her shop)
    BARRY:
    They have a huge parade
    of flowers every year in Pasadena?
    VANESSA:
    To be in the Tournament of Roses,
    that's every florist's dream!

     :
    Up on a float, surrounded
    by flowers, crowds cheering.
    BARRY:
    A tournament. Do the roses
    compete in athletic events?
    VANESSA:
    No. All right, I've got one.
    How come you don't fly everywhere?
    BARRY:
    It's exhausting. Why don't you
    run everywhere? It's faster.
    VANESSA:
    Yeah, OK, I see, I see.
    All right, your turn.
    BARRY:
    TiVo. You can just freeze live TV?
    That's insane!
    VANESSA:
    You don't have that?
    BARRY:
    We have Hivo, but it's a disease.
    It's a horrible, horrible disease.
    VANESSA:
    Oh, my.
    (A human walks by and Barry narrowly avoids him)
    PASSERBY:
    Dumb bees!
    VANESSA:
    You must want to sting all those jerks.
    BARRY:
    We try not to sting.

    It's usually fatal for us.
    VANESSA:
    So you have to watch your temper
    (They walk into a store)
    BARRY:
    Very carefully.
    You kick a wall, take a walk,
     :
    write an angry letter and throw it out.
    Work through it like any emotion:
     :
    Anger, jealousy, lust.
    (Suddenly an employee(Hector) hits Barry off of Vanessa's shoulder. Hector
    thinks he's saving Vanessa)
    VANESSA:
    (To Barry)
    Oh, my goodness! Are you OK?
    (Barry is getting up off the floor)
    BARRY:
    Yeah.
    VANESSA:
    (To Hector)
    - What is wrong with you?!
    HECTOR:
    (Confused)
    - It's a bug.
    VANESSA:
    He's not bothering anybody.
    Get out of here, you creep!
    (Vanessa hits Hector across the face with the magazine he had and then hits
    him in the head. Hector backs away covering his head)
    Barry:
    What was that? A Pic 'N' Save circular?
    (Vanessa sets Barry back on her shoulder)

    VANESSA:
    Yeah, it was. How did you know?
    BARRY:
    It felt like about 10 pages.
    Seventy-five is pretty much our limit.
    VANESSA:
    You've really got that
    down to a science.
    BARRY:
    - Oh, we have to. I lost a cousin to Italian Vogue.
    VANESSA:
    - I'll bet.
    (Barry looks to his right and notices there is honey for sale in the aisle)
    BARRY:
    What in the name
    of Mighty Hercules is this?
    (Barry looks at all the brands of honey, shocked)
    How did this get here?
    Cute Bee, Golden Blossom,
     :
    Ray Liotta Private Select?
    (Barry puts his hands up and slowly turns around, a look of disgust on his
    face)
    VANESSA:
    - Is he that actor?
    BARRY:
    - I never heard of him.
     :
    - Why is this here?
    VANESSA:
    - For people. We eat it.
    BARRY:

    You don't have
    enough food of your own?!
    (Hector looks back and notices that Vanessa is talking to Barry)
    VANESSA:
    - Well, yes.
    BARRY:
    - How do you get it?
    VANESSA:
    - Bees make it.
    BARRY:
    - I know who makes it!
     :
    And it's hard to make it!
     :
    There's heating, cooling, stirring.
    You need a whole Krelman thing!
    VANESSA:
    - It's organic.
    BARRY:
    - It's our-ganic!
    VANESSA:
    It's just honey, Barry.
    BARRY:
    Just what?!
     :
    Bees don't know about this!
    This is stealing! A lot of stealing!
     :
    You've taken our homes, schools,
    hospitals! This is all we have!
     :

    And it's on sale?!
    I'm getting to the bottom of this.
     :
    I'm getting to the bottom
    of all of this!
    (Flash forward in time; Barry paints his face with black strikes like a
    soldier and sneaks into the storage section of the store)
    (Two men, including Hector, are loading boxes into some trucks)
     :
    SUPERMARKET EMPLOYEE==
    Hey, Hector.
     :
    - You almost done?
    HECTOR:
    - Almost.
    (Barry takes a step to peak around the corner)
    (Whispering)
    He is here. I sense it.
     :
    Well, I guess I'll go home now
    (Hector pretends to walk away by walking in place and speaking loudly)
     :
    and just leave this nice honey out,
    with no one around.
    BARRY:
    You're busted, box boy!
    HECTOR:
    I knew I heard something!
    So you can talk!
    BARRY:
    I can talk.
    And now you'll start talking!
     :
    Where you getting the sweet stuff?

    Who's your supplier?
    HECTOR:
    I don't understand.
    I thought we were friends.
     :
    The last thing we want
    to do is upset bees!
    (Hector takes a thumbtack out of the board behind him and sword-fights
    Barry. Barry is using his stinger like a sword)
     :
    You're too late! It's ours now!
    BARRY:
    You, sir, have crossed
    the wrong sword!
    HECTOR:
    You, sir, will be lunch
    for my iguana, Ignacio!
    (Barry hits the thumbtack out of Hectors hand and Hector surrenders)
    Barry:
    Where is the honey coming from?
     :
    Tell me where!
    HECTOR:
    (Pointing to leaving truck)
    Honey Farms! It comes from Honey Farms!
    (Barry chases after the truck but it is getting away. He flies onto a
    bicyclists' backpack and he catches up to the truck)
    CAR DRIVER:
    (To bicyclist)
    Crazy person!
    (Barry flies off and lands on the windshield of the Honey farms truck.
    Barry looks around and sees dead bugs splattered everywhere)
    BARRY:
    What horrible thing has happened here?

     :
    These faces, they never knew
    what hit them. And now
     :
    they're on the road to nowhere!
    (Barry hears a sudden whisper)
    (Barry looks up and sees Mooseblood, a mosquito playing dead)
    MOOSEBLOOD:
    Just keep still.
    BARRY:
    What? You're not dead?
    MOOSEBLOOD:
    Do I look dead? They will wipe anything
    that moves. Where you headed?
    BARRY:
    To Honey Farms.
    I am onto something huge here.
    MOOSEBLOOD:
    I'm going to Alaska. Moose blood,
    crazy stuff. Blows your head off!
    ANOTHER BUG PLAYING DEAD:
    I'm going to Tacoma.
    (Barry looks at another bug)
    BARRY:
    - And you?
    MOOSEBLOOD:
    - He really is dead.
    BARRY:
    All right.
    (Another bug hits the windshield and the drivers notice. They activate the
    windshield wipers)
    MOOSEBLOOD==
    Uh-oh!
    (The windshield wipers are slowly sliding over the dead bugs and wiping

    them off)
    BARRY:
    - What is that?!
    MOOSEBLOOD:
    - Oh, no!
     :
    - A wiper! Triple blade!
    BARRY:
    - Triple blade?
    MOOSEBLOOD:
    Jump on! It's your only chance, bee!
    (Mooseblood and Barry grab onto the wiper and they hold on as it wipes the
    windshield)
    Why does everything have
    to be so doggone clean?!
     :
    How much do you people need to see?!
    (Bangs on windshield)
     :
    Open your eyes!
    Stick your head out the window!
    RADIO IN TRUCK:
    From NPR News in Washington,
    I'm Carl Kasell.
    MOOSEBLOOD:
    But don't kill no more bugs!
    (Mooseblood and Barry are washed off by the wipr fluid)
    MOOSEBLOOD:
    - Bee!
    BARRY:
    - Moose blood guy!!
    (Barry starts screaming as he hangs onto the antenna)
    (Suddenly it is revealed that a water bug is also hanging on the antenna.

    There is a pause and then Barry and the water bug both start screaming)
    TRUCK DRIVER:
    - You hear something?
    GUY IN TRUCK:
    - Like what?
    TRUCK DRIVER:
    Like tiny screaming.
    GUY IN TRUCK:
    Turn off the radio.
    (The antenna starts to lower until it gets to low and sinks into the truck.
    The water bug flies off and Barry is forced to let go and he is blown away.
    He luckily lands inside a horn on top of the truck where he finds
    Mooseblood, who was blown into the same place)
    MOOSEBLOOD:
    Whassup, bee boy?
    BARRY:
    Hey, Blood.
    (Fast forward in time and we see that Barry is deep in conversation with
    Mooseblood. They have been sitting in this truck for a while)
    BARRY:
    ...Just a row of honey jars,
    as far as the eye could see.
    MOOSEBLOOD:
    Wow!
    BARRY:
    I assume wherever this truck goes
    is where they're getting it.
     :
    I mean, that honey's ours.
    MOOSEBLOOD:
    - Bees hang tight.
    BARRY:

    - We're all jammed in.
     :
    It's a close community.
    MOOSEBLOOD:
    Not us, man. We on our own.
    Every mosquito on his own.
    BARRY:
    - What if you get in trouble?
    MOOSEBLOOD:
    - You a mosquito, you in trouble.
     :
    Nobody likes us. They just smack.
    See a mosquito, smack, smack!
    BARRY:
    At least you're out in the world.
    You must meet girls.
    MOOSEBLOOD:
    Mosquito girls try to trade up,
    get with a moth, dragonfly.
     :
    Mosquito girl don't want no mosquito.
    (An ambulance passes by and it has a blood donation sign on it)
    You got to be kidding me!
     :
    Mooseblood's about to leave
    the building! So long, bee!
    (Mooseblood leaves and flies onto the window of the ambulance where there
    are other mosquito's hanging out)
     :
    - Hey, guys!
    OTHER MOSQUITO:
    - Mooseblood!

    MOOSEBLOOD:
    I knew I'd catch y'all down here.
    Did you bring your crazy straw?
    (The truck goes out of view and Barry notices that the truck he's on is
    pulling into a camp of some sort)
    TRUCK DRIVER:
    We throw it in jars, slap a label on it,
    and it's pretty much pure profit.
    (Barry flies out)
    BARRY:
    What is this place?
    BEEKEEPER 1#:
    A bee's got a brain
    the size of a pinhead.
    BEEKEEPER #2:
    They are pinheads!
     :
    Pinhead.
     :
    - Check out the new smoker.
    BEEKEEPER #1:
    - Oh, sweet. That's the one you want.
     :
    The Thomas 3000!
    BARRY:
    Smoker?
    BEEKEEPER #1:
    Ninety puffs a minute, semi-automatic.
    Twice the nicotine, all the tar.
     :
    A couple breaths of this
    knocks them right out.

    BEEKEEPER #2:
    They make the honey,
    and we make the money.
    BARRY:
    "They make the honey,
    and we make the money"?
    (The Beekeeper sprays hundreds of cheap miniature apartments with the
    smoker. The bees are fainting or passing out)
    Oh, my!
     :
    What's going on? Are you OK?
    (Barry flies into one of the apartment and helps a Bee couple get off the
    ground. They are coughing and its hard for them to stand)
    BEE IN APARTMENT:
    Yeah. It doesn't last too long.
    BARRY:
    Do you know you're
    in a fake hive with fake walls?
    BEE IN APPARTMENT:
    Our queen was moved here.
    We had no choice.
    (The apartment room is completely empty except for a photo on the wall of
    the "queen" who is obviously a man in women's clothes)
    BARRY:
    This is your queen?
    That's a man in women's clothes!
     :
    That's a drag queen!
     :
    What is this?
    (Barry flies out and he discovers that there are hundreds of these
    structures, each housing thousands of Bees)
    Oh, no!
     :
    There's hundreds of them!
    (Barry takes out his camera and takes pictures of these Bee work camps. The
    beekeepers look very evil in these depictions)

    Bee honey.
     :
    Our honey is being brazenly stolen
    on a massive scale!
     :
    This is worse than anything bears
    have done! I intend to do something.
    (Flash forward in time and Barry is showing these pictures to his parents)
    JANET:
    Oh, Barry, stop.
    MARTIN:
    Who told you humans are taking
    our honey? That's a rumor.
    BARRY:
    Do these look like rumors?
    (Holds up the pictures)
    UNCLE CARL:
    That's a conspiracy theory.
    These are obviously doctored photos.
    JANET:
    How did you get mixed up in this?
    ADAM:
    He's been talking to humans.
    JANET:
    - What?
    MARTIN:
    - Talking to humans?!
    ADAM:
    He has a human girlfriend.
    And they make out!
    JANET:
    Make out? Barry!

    BARRY:
    We do not.
    ADAM:
    - You wish you could.
    MARTIN:
    - Whose side are you on?
    BARRY:
    The bees!
    UNCLE CARL:
    (He has been sitting in the back of the room this entire time)
    I dated a cricket once in San Antonio.
    Those crazy legs kept me up all night.
    JANET:
    Barry, this is what you want
    to do with your life?
    BARRY:
    I want to do it for all our lives.
    Nobody works harder than bees!
     :
    Dad, I remember you
    coming home so overworked
     :
    your hands were still stirring.
    You couldn't stop.
    JANET:
    I remember that.
    BARRY:
    What right do they have to our honey?
     :
    We live on two cups a year. They put it
    in lip balm for no reason whatsoever!

    ADAM:
    Even if it's true, what can one bee do?
    BARRY:
    Sting them where it really hurts.
    MARTIN:
    In the face! The eye!
     :
    - That would hurt.
    BARRY:
    - No.
    MARTIN:
    Up the nose? That's a killer.
    BARRY:
    There's only one place you can sting
    the humans, one place where it matters.
    (Flash forward a bit in time and we are watching the Bee News)
    BEE NEWS NARRATOR:
    Hive at Five, the hive's only
    full-hour action news source.
    BEE PROTESTOR:
    No more bee beards!
    BEE NEWS NARRATOR:
    With Bob Bumble at the anchor desk.
     :
    Weather with Storm Stinger.
     :
    Sports with Buzz Larvi.
     :
    And Jeanette Chung.
    BOB BUMBLE:
    - Good evening. I'm Bob Bumble.
    JEANETTE CHUNG:

    - And I'm Jeanette Chung.
    BOB BUMBLE:
    A tri-county bee, Barry Benson,
     :
    intends to sue the human race
    for stealing our honey,
     :
    packaging it and profiting
    from it illegally!
    JEANETTE CHUNG:
    Tomorrow night on Bee Larry King,
     :
    we'll have three former queens here in
    our studio, discussing their new book,
     :
    Classy Ladies,
    out this week on Hexagon.
    (The scene changes to an interview on the news with Bee version of Larry
    King and Barry)
    BEE LARRY KING:
    Tonight we're talking to Barry Benson.
     :
    Did you ever think, "I'm a kid
    from the hive. I can't do this"?
    BARRY:
    Bees have never been afraid
    to change the world.
     :
    What about Bee Columbus?
    Bee Gandhi? Bejesus?
    BEE LARRY KING:
    Where I'm from, we'd never sue humans.

     :
    We were thinking
    of stickball or candy stores.
    BARRY:
    How old are you?
    BEE LARRY KING:
    The bee community
    is supporting you in this case,
     :
    which will be the trial
    of the bee century.
    BARRY:
    You know, they have a Larry King
    in the human world too.
    BEE LARRY KING:
    It's a common name. Next week...
    BARRY:
    He looks like you and has a show
    and suspenders and colored dots...
    BEE LARRY KING:
    Next week...
    BARRY:
    Glasses, quotes on the bottom from the
    guest even though you just heard 'em.
    BEE LARRY KING:
    Bear Week next week!
    They're scary, hairy and here, live.
    (Bee Larry King gets annoyed and flies away offscreen)
    BARRY:
    Always leans forward, pointy shoulders,
    squinty eyes, very Jewish.
    (Flash forward in time. We see Vanessa enter and Ken enters behind her.
    They are arguing)

    KEN:
    In tennis, you attack
    at the point of weakness!
    VANESSA:
    It was my grandmother, Ken. She's 81.
    KEN==
    Honey, her backhand's a joke!
    I'm not gonna take advantage of that?
    BARRY:
    (To Ken)
    Quiet, please.
    Actual work going on here.
    KEN:
    (Pointing at Barry)
    - Is that that same bee?
    VANESSA:
    - Yes, it is!
     :
    I'm helping him sue the human race.
    BARRY:
    - Hello.
    KEN:
    - Hello, bee.
    VANESSA:
    This is Ken.
    BARRY:
    (Recalling the "Winter Boots" incident earlier)
    Yeah, I remember you. Timberland, size
    ten and a half. Vibram sole, I believe.
    KEN:
    (To Vanessa)
    Why does he talk again?
    VANESSA:

    Listen, you better go
    'cause we're really busy working.
    KEN:
    But it's our yogurt night!
    VANESSA:
    (Holding door open for Ken)
    Bye-bye.
    KEN:
    (Yelling)
    Why is yogurt night so difficult?!
    (Ken leaves and Vanessa walks over to Barry. His workplace is a mess)
    VANESSA:
    You poor thing.
    You two have been at this for hours!
    BARRY:
    Yes, and Adam here
    has been a huge help.
    ADAM:
    - Frosting...
    - How many sugars?
     ==BARRY==
    Just one. I try not
    to use the competition.
     :
    So why are you helping me?
    VANESSA:
    Bees have good qualities.
     :
    And it takes my mind off the shop.
     :
    Instead of flowers, people
    are giving balloon bouquets now.
    BARRY:

    Those are great, if you're three.
    VANESSA:
    And artificial flowers.
    BARRY:
    - Oh, those just get me psychotic!
    VANESSA:
    - Yeah, me too.
     :
    BARRY:
    Bent stingers, pointless pollination.
    ADAM:
    Bees must hate those fake things!
     :
    Nothing worse
    than a daffodil that's had work done.
     :
    Maybe this could make up
    for it a little bit.
    VANESSA:
    - This lawsuit's a pretty big deal.
    BARRY:
    - I guess.
    ADAM:
    You sure you want to go through with it?
    BARRY:
    Am I sure? When I'm done with
    the humans, they won't be able
     :
    to say, "Honey, I'm home,"
    without paying a royalty!
    (Flash forward in time and we are watching the human news. The camera shows

    a crowd outside a courthouse)
    NEWS REPORTER:
    It's an incredible scene
    here in downtown Manhattan,
     :
    where the world anxiously waits,
    because for the first time in history,
     :
    we will hear for ourselves
    if a honeybee can actually speak.
    (We are no longer watching through a news camera)
    ADAM:
    What have we gotten into here, Barry?
    BARRY:
    It's pretty big, isn't it?
    ADAM==
    (Looking at the hundreds of people around the courthouse)
    I can't believe how many humans
    don't work during the day.
    BARRY:
    You think billion-dollar multinational
    food companies have good lawyers?
    SECURITY GUARD:
    Everybody needs to stay
    behind the barricade.
    (A limousine drives up and a fat man,Layton Montgomery, a honey industry
    owner gets out and walks past Barry)
    ADAM:
    - What's the matter?
    BARRY:
    - I don't know, I just got a chill.
    (Fast forward in time and everyone is in the court)
    MONTGOMERY:
    Well, if it isn't the bee team.

    (To Honey Industry lawyers)
    You boys work on this?
    MAN:
    All rise! The Honorable
    Judge Bumbleton presiding.
    JUDGE BUMBLETON:
    All right. Case number 4475,
     :
    Superior Court of New York,
    Barry Bee Benson v. the Honey Industry
     :
    is now in session.
     :
    Mr. Montgomery, you're representing
    the five food companies collectively?
    MONTGOMERY:
    A privilege.
    JUDGE BUMBLETON:
    Mr. Benson... you're representing
    all the bees of the world?
    (Everyone looks closely, they are waiting to see if a Bee can really talk)
    (Barry makes several buzzing sounds to sound like a Bee)
    BARRY:
    I'm kidding. Yes, Your Honor,
    we're ready to proceed.
    JUDGE BUMBLBETON:
    Mr. Montgomery,
    your opening statement, please.
    MONTGOMERY:
    Ladies and gentlemen of the jury,
     :
    my grandmother was a simple woman.
     :

    Born on a farm, she believed
    it was man's divine right
     :
    to benefit from the bounty
    of nature God put before us.
     :
    If we lived in the topsy-turvy world
    Mr. Benson imagines,
     :
    just think of what would it mean.
     :
    I would have to negotiate
    with the silkworm
     :
    for the elastic in my britches!
     :
    Talking bee!
    (Montgomery walks over and looks closely at Barry)
     :
    How do we know this isn't some sort of
     :
    holographic motion-picture-capture
    Hollywood wizardry?
     :
    They could be using laser beams!
     :
    Robotics! Ventriloquism!
    Cloning! For all we know,
     :
    he could be on steroids!
    JUDGE BUMBLETON:
    Mr. Benson?

    BARRY:
    Ladies and gentlemen,
    there's no trickery here.
     :
    I'm just an ordinary bee.
    Honey's pretty important to me.
     :
    It's important to all bees.
    We invented it!
     :
    We make it. And we protect it
    with our lives.
     :
    Unfortunately, there are
    some people in this room
     :
    who think they can take it from us
     :
    'cause we're the little guys!
    I'm hoping that, after this is all over,
     :
    you'll see how, by taking our honey,
    you not only take everything we have
     :
    but everything we are!
    JANET==
    (To Martin)
    I wish he'd dress like that
    all the time. So nice!
    JUDGE BUMBLETON:
    Call your first witness.
    BARRY:
    So, Mr. Klauss Vanderhayden

    of Honey Farms, big company you have.
    KLAUSS VANDERHAYDEN:
    I suppose so.
    BARRY:
    I see you also own
    Honeyburton and Honron!
    KLAUSS:
    Yes, they provide beekeepers
    for our farms.
    BARRY:
    Beekeeper. I find that
    to be a very disturbing term.
     :
    I don't imagine you employ
    any bee-free-ers, do you?
    KLAUSS:
    (Quietly)
    - No.
    BARRY:
    - I couldn't hear you.
    KLAUSS:
    - No.
    BARRY:
    - No.
     :
    Because you don't free bees.
    You keep bees. Not only that,
     :
    it seems you thought a bear would be
    an appropriate image for a jar of honey.
    KLAUSS:
    They're very lovable creatures.

     :
    Yogi Bear, Fozzie Bear, Build-A-Bear.
    BARRY:
    You mean like this?
    (The bear from Over The Hedge barges in through the back door and it is
    roaring and standing on its hind legs. It is thrashing its claws and people
    are screaming. It is being held back by a guard who has the bear on a
    chain)
     :
    (Pointing to the roaring bear)
    Bears kill bees!
     :
    How'd you like his head crashing
    through your living room?!
     :
    Biting into your couch!
    Spitting out your throw pillows!
    JUDGE BUMBLETON:
    OK, that's enough. Take him away.
    (The bear stops roaring and thrashing and walks out)
    BARRY:
    So, Mr. Sting, thank you for being here.
    Your name intrigues me.
     :
    - Where have I heard it before?
    MR. STING:
    - I was with a band called The Police.
    BARRY:
    But you've never been
    a police officer, have you?
    STING:
    No, I haven't.
    BARRY:

    No, you haven't. And so here
    we have yet another example
     :
    of bee culture casually
    stolen by a human
     :
    for nothing more than
    a prance-about stage name.
    STING:
    Oh, please.
    BARRY:
    Have you ever been stung, Mr. Sting?
     :
    Because I'm feeling
    a little stung, Sting.
     :
    Or should I say... Mr. Gordon M. Sumner!
    MONTGOMERY:
    That's not his real name?! You idiots!
    BARRY:
    Mr. Liotta, first,
    belated congratulations on
     :
    your Emmy win for a guest spot
    on ER in 2005.
    RAY LIOTTA:
    Thank you. Thank you.
    BARRY:
    I see from your resume
    that you're devilishly handsome
     :
    with a churning inner turmoil

    that's ready to blow.
    RAY LIOTTA:
    I enjoy what I do. Is that a crime?
    BARRY:
    Not yet it isn't. But is this
    what it's come to for you?
     :
    Exploiting tiny, helpless bees
    so you don't
     :
    have to rehearse
    your part and learn your lines, sir?
    RAY LIOTTA:
    Watch it, Benson!
    I could blow right now!
    BARRY:
    This isn't a goodfella.
    This is a badfella!
    (Ray Liotta looses it and tries to grab Barry)
    RAY LIOTTA:
    Why doesn't someone just step on
    this creep, and we can all go home?!
    JUDGE BUMBLETON:
    - Order in this court!
    RAY LIOTTA:
    - You're all thinking it!
    (Judge Bumbleton starts banging her gavel)
    JUDGE BUMBLETON:
    Order! Order, I say!
    RAY LIOTTA:
    - Say it!
    MAN:

    - Mr. Liotta, please sit down!
    (We see a montage of magazines which feature the court case)
    (Flash forward in time and Barry is back home with Vanessa)
    BARRY:
    I think it was awfully nice
    of that bear to pitch in like that.
    VANESSA:
    I think the jury's on our side.
    BARRY:
    Are we doing everything right,you know, legally?
    VANESSA:
    I'm a florist.
    BARRY:
    Right. Well, here's to a great team.
    VANESSA:
    To a great team!
    (Ken walks in from work. He sees Barry and he looks upset when he sees
    Barry clinking his glass with Vanessa)
    KEN:
    Well, hello.
    VANESSA:
    - Oh, Ken!
    BARRY:
    - Hello!
    VANESSA:
    I didn't think you were coming.
     :
    No, I was just late.
    I tried to call, but...
    (Ken holds up his phone and flips it open. The phone has no charge)
    ...the battery...
    VANESSA:

    I didn't want all this to go to waste,
    so I called Barry. Luckily, he was free.
    KEN:
    Oh, that was lucky.
    (Ken sits down at the table across from Barry and Vanessa leaves the room)
    VANESSA:
    There's a little left.
    I could heat it up.
    KEN:
    (Not taking his eyes off Barry)
    Yeah, heat it up, sure, whatever.
    BARRY:
    So I hear you're quite a tennis player.
     :
    I'm not much for the game myself.
    The ball's a little grabby.
    KEN:
    That's where I usually sit.
    Right...
    (Points to where Barry is sitting)
    there.
    VANESSA:
    (Calling from other room)
    Ken, Barry was looking at your resume,
     :
    and he agreed with me that eating with
    chopsticks isn't really a special skill.
    KEN:
    (To Barry)
    You think I don't see what you're doing?
    BARRY:
    I know how hard it is to find
    the right job. We have that in common.

    KEN:
    Do we?
    BARRY:
    Bees have 100 percent employment,
    but we do jobs like taking the crud out.
    KEN:
    (Menacingly)
    That's just what
    I was thinking about doing.
    (Ken reaches for a fork on the table but knocks if on the floor. He goes to
    pick it up)
    VANESSA:
    Ken, I let Barry borrow your razor
    for his fuzz. I hope that was all right.
    (Ken quickly rises back up after hearing this but hits his head on the
    table and yells)
    BARRY:
    I'm going to drain the old stinger.
    KEN:
    Yeah, you do that.
    (Barry flies past Ken to get to the bathroom and Ken freaks out, splashing
    some of the wine he was using to cool his head in his eyes. He yells in
    anger)
    (Barry looks at the magazines featuring his victories in court)
    BARRY:
    Look at that.
    (Barry flies into the bathroom)
    (He puts his hand on his head but this makes hurts him and makes him even
    madder. He yells again)
    (Barry is washing his hands in the sink but then Ken walks in)
    KEN:
    You know, you know I've just about had it
    (Closes bathroom door behind him)
    with your little mind games.
    (Ken is menacingly rolling up a magazine)
    BARRY:

    (Backing away)
    - What's that?
    KEN:
    - Italian Vogue.
    BARRY:
    Mamma mia, that's a lot of pages.
    KEN:
    It's a lot of ads.
    BARRY:
    Remember what Van said, why is
    your life more valuable than mine?
    KEN:
    That's funny, I just can't seem to recall that!
    (Ken smashes everything off the sink with the magazine and Barry narrowly
    escapes)
    (Ken follows Barry around and tries to hit him with the magazine but he
    keeps missing)
    (Ken gets a spray bottle)
     :
    I think something stinks in here!
    BARRY:
    (Enjoying the spray)
    I love the smell of flowers.
    (Ken holds a lighter in front of the spray bottle)
    KEN:
    How do you like the smell of flames?!
    BARRY:
    Not as much.
    (Ken fires his make-shift flamethrower but misses Barry, burning the
    bathroom. He torches the whole room but looses his footing and falls into
    the bathtub. After getting hit in the head by falling objects 3 times he
    picks up the shower head, revealing a Water bug hiding under it)
    WATER BUG:
    Water bug! Not taking sides!

    (Barry gets up out of a pile of bathroom supplies and he is wearing a
    chapstick hat)
    BARRY:
    Ken, I'm wearing a Chapstick hat!
    This is pathetic!
    (Ken switches the shower head to lethal)
    KEN:
    I've got issues!
    (Ken sprays Barry with the shower head and he crash lands into the toilet)
    (Ken menacingly looks down into the toilet at Barry)
    Well, well, well, a royal flush!
    BARRY:
    - You're bluffing.
    KEN:
    - Am I?
    (flushes toilet)
    (Barry grabs a chapstick from the toilet seat and uses it to surf in the
    flushing toilet)
    BARRY:
    Surf's up, dude!
    (Barry flies out of the toilet on the chapstick and sprays Ken's face with
    the toilet water)
     :
    EW,Poo water!
    BARRY:
    That bowl is gnarly.
    KEN:
    (Aiming a toilet cleaner at Barry)
    Except for those dirty yellow rings!
    (Barry cowers and covers his head and Vanessa runs in and takes the toilet
    cleaner from Ken just before he hits Barry)
    VANESSA:
    Kenneth! What are you doing?!
    KEN==
    (Leaning towards Barry)

    You know, I don't even like honey!
    I don't eat it!
    VANESSA:
    We need to talk!
    (Vanessa pulls Ken out of the bathroom)
     :
    He's just a little bee!
     :
    And he happens to be
    the nicest bee I've met in a long time!
    KEN:
    Long time? What are you talking about?!
    Are there other bugs in your life?
    VANESSA:
    No, but there are other things bugging
    me in life. And you're one of them!
    KEN:
    Fine! Talking bees, no yogurt night...
     :
    My nerves are fried from riding
    on this emotional roller coaster!
    VANESSA:
    Goodbye, Ken.
    (Ken huffs and walks out and slams the door. But suddenly he walks back in
    and stares at Barry)
     :
    And for your information,
    I prefer sugar-free, artificial
    sweeteners MADE BY MAN!
    (Ken leaves again and Vanessa leans in towards Barry)
    VANESSA:
    I'm sorry about all that.
    (Ken walks back in again)

    KEN:
    I know it's got
    an aftertaste! I LIKE IT!
    (Ken leaves for the last time)
    VANESSA:
    I always felt there was some kind
    of barrier between Ken and me.
     :
    I couldn't overcome it.
    Oh, well.
     :
    Are you OK for the trial?
    BARRY:
    I believe Mr. Montgomery
    is about out of ideas.
    (Flash forward in time and Barry, Adam, and Vanessa are back in court)
    MONTGOMERY--
    We would like to call
    Mr. Barry Benson Bee to the stand.
    ADAM:
    Good idea! You can really see why he's
    considered one of the best lawyers...
    (Barry stares at Adam)
    ...Yeah.
    LAWYER:
    Layton, you've
    gotta weave some magic
    with this jury,
    or it's gonna be all over.
    MONTGOMERY:
    Don't worry. The only thing I have
    to do to turn this jury around
     :
    is to remind them
    of what they don't like about bees.
    (To lawyer)

    - You got the tweezers?
    LAWYER:
    - Are you allergic?
    MONTGOMERY:
    Only to losing, son. Only to losing.
     :
    Mr. Benson Bee, I'll ask you
    what I think we'd all like to know.
     :
    What exactly is your relationship
    (Points to Vanessa)
     :
    to that woman?
    BARRY:
    We're friends.
    MONTGOMERY:
    - Good friends?
    BARRY:
    - Yes.
    MONTGOMERY:
    How good? Do you live together?
    ADAM:
    Wait a minute...
     :
    MONTGOMERY:
    Are you her little...
     :
    ...bedbug?
    (Adam's stinger starts vibrating. He is agitated)
    I've seen a bee documentary or two.
    From what I understand,

     :
    doesn't your queen give birth
    to all the bee children?
    BARRY:
    - Yeah, but...
    MONTGOMERY:
    (Pointing at Janet and Martin)
    - So those aren't your real parents!
    JANET:
    - Oh, Barry...
    BARRY:
    - Yes, they are!
    ADAM:
    Hold me back!
    (Vanessa tries to hold Adam back. He wants to sting Montgomery)
    MONTGOMERY:
    You're an illegitimate bee,
    aren't you, Benson?
    ADAM:
    He's denouncing bees!
    MONTGOMERY:
    Don't y'all date your cousins?
    (Montgomery leans over on the jury stand and stares at Adam)
    VANESSA:
    - Objection!
    (Vanessa raises her hand to object but Adam gets free. He flies straight at
    Montgomery)
    =ADAM:
    - I'm going to pincushion this guy!
    BARRY:
    Adam, don't! It's what he wants!
    (Adam stings Montgomery in the butt and he starts thrashing around)

    MONTGOMERY:
    Oh, I'm hit!!
     :
    Oh, lordy, I am hit!
    JUDGE BUMBLETON:
    (Banging gavel)
    Order! Order!
    MONTGOMERY:
    (Overreacting)
    The venom! The venom
    is coursing through my veins!
     :
    I have been felled
    by a winged beast of destruction!
     :
    You see? You can't treat them
    like equals! They're striped savages!
     :
    Stinging's the only thing
    they know! It's their way!
    BARRY:
    - Adam, stay with me.
    ADAM:
    - I can't feel my legs.
    MONTGOMERY:
    (Overreacting and throwing his body around the room)
    What angel of mercy
    will come forward to suck the poison
     :
    from my heaving buttocks?
    JUDGE BUMLBETON:
    I will have order in this court. Order!

     :
    Order, please!
    (Flash forward in time and we see a human news reporter)
    NEWS REPORTER:
    The case of the honeybees
    versus the human race
     :
    took a pointed turn against the bees
     :
    yesterday when one of their legal
    team stung Layton T. Montgomery.
    (Adam is laying in a hospital bed and Barry flies in to see him)
    BARRY:
    - Hey, buddy.
    ADAM:
    - Hey.
    BARRY:
    - Is there much pain?
    ADAM:
    - Yeah.
     :
    I...
     :
    I blew the whole case, didn't I?
    BARRY:
    It doesn't matter. What matters is
    you're alive. You could have died.
    ADAM:
    I'd be better off dead. Look at me.
    (A small plastic sword is replaced as Adam's stinger)
    They got it from the cafeteria
    downstairs, in a tuna sandwich.

     :
    Look, there's
    a little celery still on it.
    (Flicks off the celery and sighs)
    BARRY:
    What was it like to sting someone?
    ADAM:
    I can't explain it. It was all...
     :
    All adrenaline and then...
    and then ecstasy!
    BARRY:
    ...All right.
    ADAM:
    You think it was all a trap?
    BARRY:
    Of course. I'm sorry.
    I flew us right into this.
     :
    What were we thinking? Look at us. We're
    just a couple of bugs in this world.
    ADAM:
    What will the humans do to us
    if they win?
    BARRY:
    I don't know.
    ADAM:
    I hear they put the roaches in motels.
    That doesn't sound so bad.
    BARRY:
    Adam, they check in,
    but they don't check out!

    ADAM:
    Oh, my.
    (Coughs)
    Could you get a nurse
    to close that window?
    BARRY:
    - Why?
    ADAM:
    - The smoke.
    (We can see that two humans are smoking cigarettes outside)
     :
    Bees don't smoke.
    BARRY:
    Right. Bees don't smoke.
     :
    Bees don't smoke!
    But some bees are smoking.
     :
    That's it! That's our case!
    ADAM:
    It is? It's not over?
    BARRY:
    Get dressed. I've gotta go somewhere.
     :
    Get back to the court and stall.
    Stall any way you can.
    (Flash forward in time and Adam is making a paper boat in the courtroom)
    ADAM:
    And assuming you've done step 29 correctly, you're ready for the tub!
    (We see that the jury have each made their own paper boats after being
    taught how by Adam. They all look confused)
    JUDGE BUMBLETON:

    Mr. Flayman.
    ADAM:
    Yes? Yes, Your Honor!
    JUDGE BUMBLETON:
    Where is the rest of your team?
    ADAM:
    (Continues stalling)
    Well, Your Honor, it's interesting.
     :
    Bees are trained to fly haphazardly,
     :
    and as a result,
    we don't make very good time.
     :
    I actually heard a funny story about...
    MONTGOMERY:
    Your Honor,
    haven't these ridiculous bugs
     :
    taken up enough
    of this court's valuable time?
     :
    How much longer will we allow
    these absurd shenanigans to go on?
     :
    They have presented no compelling
    evidence to support their charges
     :
    against my clients,
    who run legitimate businesses.
     :
    I move for a complete dismissal

    of this entire case!
    JUDGE BUMBLETON:
    Mr. Flayman, I'm afraid I'm going
     :
    to have to consider
    Mr. Montgomery's motion.
    ADAM:
    But you can't! We have a terrific case.
    MONTGOMERY:
    Where is your proof?
    Where is the evidence?
     :
    Show me the smoking gun!
    BARRY:
    (Barry flies in through the door)
    Hold it, Your Honor!
    You want a smoking gun?
     :
    Here is your smoking gun.
    (Vanessa walks in holding a bee smoker. She sets it down on the Judge's
    podium)
    JUDGE BUMBLETON:
    What is that?
    BARRY:
    It's a bee smoker!
    MONTGOMERY:
    (Picks up smoker)
    What, this?
    This harmless little contraption?
     :
    This couldn't hurt a fly,
    let alone a bee.
    (Montgomery accidentally fires it at the bees in the crowd and they faint

    and cough)
    (Dozens of reporters start taking pictures of the suffering bees)
    BARRY:
    Look at what has happened
     :
    to bees who have never been asked,
    "Smoking or non?"
     :
    Is this what nature intended for us?
     :
    To be forcibly addicted
    to smoke machines
     :
    and man-made wooden slat work camps?
     :
    Living out our lives as honey slaves
    to the white man?
    (Barry points to the honey industry owners. One of them is an African
    American so he awkwardly separates himself from the others)
    LAWYER:
    - What are we gonna do?
    - He's playing the species card.
    BARRY:
    Ladies and gentlemen, please,
    free these bees!
    ADAM AND VANESSA:
    Free the bees! Free the bees!
    BEES IN CROWD:
    Free the bees!
    HUMAN JURY:
    Free the bees! Free the bees!
    JUDGE BUMBLETON:
    The court finds in favor of the bees!

    BARRY:
    Vanessa, we won!
    VANESSA:
    I knew you could do it! High-five!
    (Vanessa hits Barry hard because her hand is too big)
     :
    Sorry.
    BARRY:
    (Overjoyed)
    I'm OK! You know what this means?
     :
    All the honey
    will finally belong to the bees.
     :
    Now we won't have
    to work so hard all the time.
    MONTGOMERY:
    This is an unholy perversion
    of the balance of nature, Benson.
     :
    You'll regret this.
    (Montgomery leaves and Barry goes outside the courtroom. Several reporters
    start asking Barry questions)
    REPORTER 1#:
    Barry, how much honey is out there?
    BARRY:
    All right. One at a time.
    REPORTER 2#:
    Barry, who are you wearing?
    BARRY:
    My sweater is Ralph Lauren,
    and I have no pants.

    (Barry flies outside with the paparazzi and Adam and Vanessa stay back)
    ADAM:
    (To Vanessa)
    - What if Montgomery's right?
    Vanessa:
    - What do you mean?
    ADAM:
    We've been living the bee way
    a long time, 27 million years.
    (Flash forward in time and Barry is talking to a man)
    BUSINESS MAN:
    Congratulations on your victory.
    What will you demand as a settlement?
    BARRY:
    First, we'll demand a complete shutdown
    of all bee work camps.
    (As Barry is talking we see a montage of men putting "closed" tape over the
    work camps and freeing the bees in the crappy apartments)
    Then we want back the honey
    that was ours to begin with,
     :
    every last drop.
    (Men in suits are pushing all the honey of the aisle and into carts)
    We demand an end to the glorification
    of the bear as anything more
    (We see a statue of a bear-shaped honey container being pulled down by
    bees)
    than a filthy, smelly,
    bad-breath stink machine.
     :
    We're all aware
    of what they do in the woods.
    (We see Winnie the Pooh sharing his honey with Piglet in the cross-hairs of
    a high-tech sniper rifle)
    BARRY:
    (Looking through binoculars)

    Wait for my signal.
     :
    Take him out.
    (Winnie gets hit by a tranquilizer dart and dramatically falls off the log
    he was standing on, his tongue hanging out. Piglet looks at Pooh in fear
    and the Sniper takes the honey.)
    SNIPER:
    He'll have nausea
    for a few hours, then he'll be fine.
    (Flash forward in time)
    BARRY:
    And we will no longer tolerate
    bee-negative nicknames...
    (Mr. Sting is sitting at home until he is taken out of his house by the men
    in suits)
    STING:
    But it's just a prance-about stage name!
    BARRY:
    ...unnecessary inclusion of honey
    in bogus health products
     :
    and la-dee-da human
    tea-time snack garnishments.
    (An old lady is mixing honey into her tea but suddenly men in suits smash
    her face down on the table and take the honey)
    OLD LADY:
    Can't breathe.
    (A honey truck pulls up to Barry's hive)
    WORKER:
    Bring it in, boys!
     :
    Hold it right there! Good.
     :
    Tap it.

    (Tons of honey is being pumped into the hive's storage)
    BEE WORKER 1#:
    (Honey overflows from the cup)
    Mr. Buzzwell, we just passed three cups,
    and there's gallons more coming!
     :
    - I think we need to shut down!
    =BEE WORKER #2=
    - Shut down? We've never shut down.
     :
    Shut down honey production!
    DEAN BUZZWELL:
    Stop making honey!
    (The bees all leave their stations. Two bees run into a room and they put
    the keys into a machine)
    Turn your key, sir!
    (Two worker bees dramatically turn their keys, which opens the button which
    they press, shutting down the honey-making machines. This is the first time
    this has ever happened)
    BEE:
    ...What do we do now?
    (Flash forward in time and a Bee is about to jump into a pool full of
    honey)
    Cannonball!
    (The bee gets stuck in the honey and we get a short montage of Bees leaving
    work)
    (We see the Pollen Jocks flying but one of them gets a call on his antenna)
    LOU LU DUVA:
    (Through "phone")
    We're shutting honey production!
     :
    Mission abort.
    POLLEN JOCK #1:
    Aborting pollination and nectar detail.
    Returning to base.
    (The Pollen Jocks fly back to the hive)

    (We get a time lapse of Central Park slowly wilting away as the bees all
    relax)
    BARRY:
    Adam, you wouldn't believe
    how much honey was out there.
    ADAM:
    Oh, yeah?
    BARRY:
    What's going on? Where is everybody?
    (The entire street is deserted)
     :
    - Are they out celebrating?
    ADAM:
    - They're home.
     :
    They don't know what to do.
    Laying out, sleeping in.
     :
    I heard your Uncle Carl was on his way
    to San Antonio with a cricket.
    BARRY:
    At least we got our honey back.
    ADAM:
    Sometimes I think, so what if humans
    liked our honey? Who wouldn't?
     :
    It's the greatest thing in the world!
    I was excited to be part of making it.
     :
    This was my new desk. This was my
    new job. I wanted to do it really well.
     :

    And now...
     :
    Now I can't.
    (Flash forward in time and Barry is talking to Vanessa)
    BARRY:
    I don't understand
    why they're not happy.
     :
    I thought their lives would be better!
     :
    They're doing nothing. It's amazing.
    Honey really changes people.
    VANESSA:
    You don't have any idea
    what's going on, do you?
    BARRY:
    - What did you want to show me?
    (Vanessa takes Barry to the rooftop where they first had coffee and points
    to her store)
    VANESSA:
    - This.
    (Points at her flowers. They are all grey and wilting)
    BARRY:
    What happened here?
    VANESSA:
    That is not the half of it.
    (Small flash forward in time and Vanessa and Barry are on the roof of her
    store and she points to Central Park)
    (We see that Central Park is no longer green and colorful, rather it is
    grey, brown, and dead-like. It is very depressing to look at)
    BARRY:
    Oh, no. Oh, my.
     :

    They're all wilting.
    VANESSA:
    Doesn't look very good, does it?
    BARRY:
    No.
    VANESSA:
    And whose fault do you think that is?
    BARRY:
    You know, I'm gonna guess bees.
    VANESSA==
    (Staring at Barry)
    Bees?
    BARRY:
    Specifically, me.
     :
    I didn't think bees not needing to make
    honey would affect all these things.
    VANESSA:
    It's not just flowers.
    Fruits, vegetables, they all need bees.
    BARRY:
    That's our whole SAT test right there.
    VANESSA:
    Take away produce, that affects
    the entire animal kingdom.
     :
    And then, of course...
    BARRY:
    The human species?
     :
    So if there's no more pollination,

     :
    it could all just go south here,
    couldn't it?
    VANESSA:
    I know this is also partly my fault.
    BARRY:
    How about a suicide pact?
    VANESSA:
    How do we do it?
    BARRY:
    - I'll sting you, you step on me.
    VANESSA:
    - That just kills you twice.
    BARRY:
    Right, right.
    VANESSA:
    Listen, Barry...
    sorry, but I gotta get going.
    (Vanessa leaves)
    BARRY:
    (To himself)
    I had to open my mouth and talk.
     :
    Vanessa?
     :
    Vanessa? Why are you leaving?
    Where are you going?
    (Vanessa is getting into a taxi)
    VANESSA:
    To the final Tournament of Roses parade
    in Pasadena.
     :

    They've moved it to this weekend
    because all the flowers are dying.
     :
    It's the last chance
    I'll ever have to see it.
    BARRY:
    Vanessa, I just wanna say I'm sorry.
    I never meant it to turn out like this.
    VANESSA:
    I know. Me neither.
    (The taxi starts to drive away)
    BARRY:
    Tournament of Roses.
    Roses can't do sports.
     :
    Wait a minute. Roses. Roses?
     :
    Roses!
     :
    Vanessa!
    (Barry flies after the Taxi)
    VANESSA:
    Roses?!
     :
    Barry?
    (Barry is flying outside the window of the taxi)
    BARRY:
    - Roses are flowers!
    VANESSA:
    - Yes, they are.
    BARRY:
    Flowers, bees, pollen!

    VANESSA:
    I know.
    That's why this is the last parade.
    BARRY:
    Maybe not.
    Could you ask him to slow down?
    VANESSA:
    Could you slow down?
    (The taxi driver screeches to a stop and Barry keeps flying forward)
     :
    Barry!
    (Barry flies back to the window)
    BARRY:
    OK, I made a huge mistake.
    This is a total disaster, all my fault.
    VANESSA:
    Yes, it kind of is.
    BARRY:
    I've ruined the planet.
    I wanted to help you
     :
    with the flower shop.
    I've made it worse.
    VANESSA:
    Actually, it's completely closed down.
    BARRY:
    I thought maybe you were remodeling.
     :
    But I have another idea, and it's
    greater than my previous ideas combined.
    VANESSA:
    I don't want to hear it!

    BARRY:
    All right, they have the roses,
    the roses have the pollen.
     :
    I know every bee, plant
    and flower bud in this park.
     :
    All we gotta do is get what they've got
    back here with what we've got.
     :
    - Bees.
    VANESSA:
    - Park.
    BARRY:
    - Pollen!
    VANESSA:
    - Flowers.
    BARRY:
    - Re-pollination!
    VANESSA:
    - Across the nation!
     :
    Tournament of Roses,
    Pasadena, California.
     :
    They've got nothing
    but flowers, floats and cotton candy.
     :
    Security will be tight.
    BARRY:
    I have an idea.

    (Flash forward in time. Vanessa is about to board a plane which has all the
    Roses on board.
    VANESSA:
    Vanessa Bloome, FTD.
    (Holds out badge)
     :
    Official floral business. It's real.
    SECURITY GUARD:
    Sorry, ma'am. Nice brooch.
    =VANESSA==
    Thank you. It was a gift.
    (Barry is revealed to be hiding inside the brooch)
    (Flash back in time and Barry and Vanessa are discussing their plan)
    BARRY:
    Once inside,
    we just pick the right float.
    VANESSA:
    How about The Princess and the Pea?
     :
    I could be the princess,
    and you could be the pea!
    BARRY:
    Yes, I got it.
     :
    - Where should I sit?
    GUARD:
    - What are you?
    BARRY:
    - I believe I'm the pea.
    GUARD:
    - The pea?
    VANESSA:

    It goes under the mattresses.
    GUARD:
    - Not in this fairy tale, sweetheart.
    - I'm getting the marshal.
    VANESSA:
    You do that!
    This whole parade is a fiasco!
     :
    Let's see what this baby'll do.
    (Vanessa drives the float through traffic)
    GUARD:
    Hey, what are you doing?!
    BARRY==
    Then all we do
    is blend in with traffic...
     :
    ...without arousing suspicion.
     :
    Once at the airport,
    there's no stopping us.
    (Flash forward in time and Barry and Vanessa are about to get on a plane)
    SECURITY GUARD:
    Stop! Security.
     :
    - You and your insect pack your float?
    VANESSA:
    - Yes.
    SECURITY GUARD:
    Has it been
    in your possession the entire time?
    VANESSA:
    - Yes.

    SECURITY GUARD:
    Would you remove your shoes?
    (To Barry)
    - Remove your stinger.
    BARRY:
    - It's part of me.
    SECURITY GUARD:
    I know. Just having some fun.
    Enjoy your flight.
    (Barry plotting with Vanessa)
    BARRY:
    Then if we're lucky, we'll have
    just enough pollen to do the job.
    (Flash forward in time and Barry and Vanessa are flying on the plane)
    Can you believe how lucky we are? We
    have just enough pollen to do the job!
    VANESSA:
    I think this is gonna work.
    BARRY:
    It's got to work.
    CAPTAIN SCOTT:
    (On intercom)
    Attention, passengers,
    this is Captain Scott.
     :
    We have a bit of bad weather
    in New York.
     :
    It looks like we'll experience
    a couple hours delay.
    VANESSA:
    Barry, these are cut flowers
    with no water. They'll never make it.
    BARRY:

    I gotta get up there
    and talk to them.
    VANESSA==
    Be careful.
    (Barry flies right outside the cockpit door)
    BARRY:
    Can I get help
    with the Sky Mall magazine?
    I'd like to order the talking
    inflatable nose and ear hair trimmer.
    (The flight attendant opens the door and walks out and Barry flies into the
    cockpit unseen)
    BARRY:
    Captain, I'm in a real situation.
    CAPTAIN SCOTT:
    - What'd you say, Hal?
    CO-PILOT HAL:
    - Nothing.
    (Scott notices Barry and freaks out)
    CAPTAIN SCOTT:
    Bee!
    BARRY:
    No,no,no, Don't freak out! My entire species...
    (Captain Scott gets out of his seat and tries to suck Barry into a handheld
    vacuum)
    HAL:
    (To Scott)
    What are you doing?
    (Barry lands on Hals hair but Scott sees him. He tries to suck up Barry but
    instead he sucks up Hals toupee)
    CAPTAIN SCOTT:
    Uh-oh.
    BARRY:
    - Wait a minute! I'm an attorney!

    HAL:
    (Hal doesn't know Barry is on his head)
    - Who's an attorney?
    CAPTAIN SCOTT:
    Don't move.
    (Scott hits Hal in the face with the vacuum in an attempt to hit Barry. Hal
    is knocked out and he falls on the life raft button which launches an
    infalatable boat into Scott, who gets knocked out and falls to the floor.
    They are both uncounscious.)
    BARRY:
    (To himself)
    Oh, Barry.
    BARRY:
    (On intercom, with a Southern accent)
    Good afternoon, passengers.
    This is your captain.
     :
    Would a Miss Vanessa Bloome in 24B
    please report to the cockpit?
    (Vanessa looks confused)
    (Normal accent)
    ...And please hurry!
    (Vanessa opens the door and sees the life raft and the uncounscious pilots)
    VANESSA:
    What happened here?
    BARRY:
    I tried to talk to them, but
    then there was a DustBuster,
    a toupee, a life raft exploded.
     :
    Now one's bald, one's in a boat,
    and they're both unconscious!
    VANESSA:
    ...Is that another bee joke?
    BARRY:

    - No!
     :
    No one's flying the plane!
    BUD DITCHWATER:
    (Through radio on plane)
    This is JFK control tower, Flight 356.
    What's your status?
    VANESSA:
    This is Vanessa Bloome.
    I'm a florist from New York.
    BUD:
    Where's the pilot?
    VANESSA:
    He's unconscious,
    and so is the copilot.
    BUD:
    Not good. Does anyone onboard
    have flight experience?
    BARRY:
    As a matter of fact, there is.
    BUD:
    - Who's that?
    BARRY:
    - Barry Benson.
    BUD:
    From the honey trial?! Oh, great.
    BARRY:
    Vanessa, this is nothing more
    than a big metal bee.
     :
    It's got giant wings, huge engines.

    VANESSA:
    I can't fly a plane.
    BARRY:
    - Why not? Isn't John Travolta a pilot?
    VANESSA:
    - Yes.
    BARRY:
    How hard could it be?
    (Vanessa sits down and flies for a little bit but we see lightning clouds
    outside the window)
    VANESSA:
    Wait, Barry!
    We're headed into some lightning.
    (An ominous lightning storm looms in front of the plane)
    (We are now watching the Bee News)
    BOB BUMBLE:
    This is Bob Bumble. We have some
    late-breaking news from JFK Airport,
     :
    where a suspenseful scene
    is developing.
     :
    Barry Benson,
    fresh from his legal victory...
    ADAM:
    That's Barry!
    BOB BUMBLE:
    ...is attempting to land a plane,
    loaded with people, flowers
     :
    and an incapacitated flight crew.
    JANET, MARTIN, UNCLE CAR AND ADAM:
    Flowers?!
    (The scene switches to the human news)

    REPORTER:
    (Talking with Bob Bumble)
    We have a storm in the area
    and two individuals at the controls
     :
    with absolutely no flight experience.
    BOB BUMBLE:
    Just a minute.
    There's a bee on that plane.
    BUD:
    I'm quite familiar with Mr. Benson
    and his no-account compadres.
     :
    They've done enough damage.
    REPORTER:
    But isn't he your only hope?
    BUD:
    Technically, a bee
    shouldn't be able to fly at all.
     :
    Their wings are too small...
    BARRY:
    (Through radio)
    Haven't we heard this a million times?
     :
    "The surface area of the wings
    and body mass make no sense."...
    BOB BUMBLE:
    - Get this on the air!
    BEE:
    - Got it.

    BEE NEWS CREW:
    - Stand by.
    BEE NEWS CREW:
    - We're going live!
    BARRY:
    (Through radio on TV)
    ...The way we work may be a mystery to you.
     :
    Making honey takes a lot of bees
    doing a lot of small jobs.
     :
    But let me tell you about a small job.
     :
    If you do it well,
    it makes a big difference.
     :
    More than we realized.
    To us, to everyone.
     :
    That's why I want to get bees
    back to working together.
     :
    That's the bee way!
    We're not made of Jell-O.
     :
    We get behind a fellow.
     :
    - Black and yellow!
    BEES:
    - Hello!
    (The scene switches and Barry is teaching Vanessa how to fly)
    BARRY:

    Left, right, down, hover.
    VANESSA:
    - Hover?
    BARRY:
    - Forget hover.
    VANESSA:
    This isn't so hard.
    (Pretending to honk the horn)
    Beep-beep! Beep-beep!
    (A Lightning bolt hits the plane and autopilot turns off)
    Barry, what happened?!
    BARRY:
    Wait, I think we were
    on autopilot the whole time.
    VANESSA:
    - That may have been helping me.
    BARRY:
    - And now we're not!
    VANESSA:
    So it turns out I cannot fly a plane.
    (The plane plummets but we see Lou Lu Duva and the Pollen Jocks, along with
    multiple other bees flying towards the plane)
    Lou Lu DUva:
    All of you, let's get
    behind this fellow! Move it out!
     :
    Move out!
    (The scene switches back to Vanessa and Barry in the plane)
    BARRY:
    Our only chance is if I do what I'd do,
    you copy me with the wings of the plane!
    (Barry sticks out his arms like an airplane and flys in front of Vanessa's
    face)

    VANESSA:
    Don't have to yell.
    BARRY:
    I'm not yelling!
    We're in a lot of trouble.
    VANESSA:
    It's very hard to concentrate
    with that panicky tone in your voice!
    BARRY:
    It's not a tone. I'm panicking!
    VANESSA:
    I can't do this!
    (Barry slaps Vanessa)
    BARRY:
    Vanessa, pull yourself together.
    You have to snap out of it!
    VANESSA:
    (Slaps Barry)
    You snap out of it.
    BARRY:
    (Slaps Vanessa)
     :
    You snap out of it.
    VANESSA:
    - You snap out of it!
    BARRY:
    - You snap out of it!
    (We see that all the Pollen Jocks are flying under the plane)
    VANESSA:
    - You snap out of it!
    BARRY:
    - You snap out of it!

    VANESSA:
    - You snap out of it!
    BARRY:
    - You snap out of it!
    VANESSA:
    - Hold it!
    BARRY:
    - Why? Come on, it's my turn.
    VANESSA:
    How is the plane flying?
    (The plane is now safely flying)
    VANESSA:
    I don't know.
    (Barry's antennae rings like a phone. Barry picks up)
    BARRY:
    Hello?
    LOU LU DUVA:
    (Through "phone")
    Benson, got any flowers
    for a happy occasion in there?
    (All of the Pollen Jocks are carrying the plane)
    BARRY:
    The Pollen Jocks!
     :
    They do get behind a fellow.
    LOU LU DUVA:
    - Black and yellow.
    POLLEN JOCKS:
    - Hello.
    LOU LU DUVA:
    All right, let's drop this tin can

    on the blacktop.
    BARRY:
    Where? I can't see anything. Can you?
    VANESSA:
    No, nothing. It's all cloudy.
     :
    Come on. You got to think bee, Barry.
    BARRY:
    - Thinking bee.
    - Thinking bee.
    (On the runway there are millions of bees laying on their backs)
    BEES:
    Thinking bee!
    Thinking bee! Thinking bee!
    BARRY:
    Wait a minute.
    I think I'm feeling something.
    VANESSA:
    - What?
    BARRY:
    - I don't know. It's strong, pulling me.
     :
    Like a 27-million-year-old instinct.
     :
    Bring the nose down.
    BEES:
    Thinking bee!
    Thinking bee! Thinking bee!
    CONTROL TOWER OPERATOR:
    - What in the world is on the tarmac?
    BUD:
    - Get some lights on that!

    (It is revealed that all the bees are organized into a giant pulsating
    flower formation)
    BEES:
    Thinking bee!
    Thinking bee! Thinking bee!
    BARRY:
    - Vanessa, aim for the flower.
    VANESSA:
    - OK.
    BARRY:
    Out the engines. We're going in
    on bee power. Ready, boys?
    LOU LU DUVA:
    Affirmative!
    BARRY:
    Good. Good. Easy, now. That's it.
     :
    Land on that flower!
     :
    Ready? Full reverse!
     :
    Spin it around!
    (The plane's nose is pointed at a flower painted on a nearby plane)
    - Not that flower! The other one!
    VANESSA:
    - Which one?
    BARRY:
    - That flower.
    (The plane is now pointed at a fat guy in a flowered shirt. He freaks out
    and tries to take a picture of the plane)
    VANESSA:
    - I'm aiming at the flower!

    BARRY:
    That's a fat guy in a flowered shirt.
    I mean the giant pulsating flower
    made of millions of bees!
    (The plane hovers over the bee-flower)
     :
    Pull forward. Nose down. Tail up.
     :
    Rotate around it.
    VANESSA:
    - This is insane, Barry!
    BARRY:
    - This's the only way I know how to fly.
    BUD:
    Am I koo-koo-kachoo, or is this plane
    flying in an insect-like pattern?
    (The plane is unrealistically hovering and spinning over the bee-flower)
    BARRY:
    Get your nose in there. Don't be afraid.
    Smell it. Full reverse!
     :
    Just drop it. Be a part of it.
     :
    Aim for the center!
     :
    Now drop it in! Drop it in, woman!
     :
    Come on, already.
    (The bees scatter and the plane safely lands)
    VANESSA:
    Barry, we did it!
    You taught me how to fly!

    BARRY:
    - Yes!
    (Vanessa is about to high-five Barry)
    No high-five!
    VANESSA:
    - Right.
    ADAM:
    Barry, it worked!
    Did you see the giant flower?
    BARRY:
    What giant flower? Where? Of course
    I saw the flower! That was genius!
    ADAM:
    - Thank you.
    BARRY:
    - But we're not done yet.
     :
    Listen, everyone!
     :
    This runway is covered
    with the last pollen
     :
    from the last flowers
    available anywhere on Earth.
     :
    That means this is our last chance.
     :
    We're the only ones who make honey,
    pollinate flowers and dress like this.
     :
    If we're gonna survive as a species,
    this is our moment! What do you say?

     :
    Are we going to be bees, or just
    Museum of Natural History keychains?
    BEES:
    We're bees!
    BEE WHO LIKES KEYCHAINS:
    Keychain!
    BARRY:
    Then follow me! Except Keychain.
    POLLEN JOCK #1:
    Hold on, Barry. Here.
     :
    You've earned this.
    BARRY:
    Yeah!
     :
    I'm a Pollen Jock! And it's a perfect
    fit. All I gotta do are the sleeves.
    (The Pollen Jocks throw Barry a nectar-collecting gun. Barry catches it)
    Oh, yeah.
    JANET:
    That's our Barry.
    (Barry and the Pollen Jocks get pollen from the flowers on the plane)
    (Flash forward in time and the Pollen Jocks are flying over NYC)
     :
    (Barry pollinates the flowers in Vanessa's shop and then heads to Central
    Park)
    BOY IN PARK:
    Mom! The bees are back!
    ADAM:
    (Putting on his Krelman hat)
    If anybody needs

    to make a call, now's the time.
     :
    I got a feeling we'll be
    working late tonight!
    (The bee honey factories are back up and running)
    (Meanwhile at Vanessa's shop)
    VANESSA:
    (To customer)
    Here's your change. Have a great
    afternoon! Can I help who's next?
     :
    Would you like some honey with that?
    It is bee-approved. Don't forget these.
    (There is a room in the shop where Barry does legal work for other animals.
    He is currently talking with a Cow)
    COW:
    Milk, cream, cheese, it's all me.
    And I don't see a nickel!
     :
    Sometimes I just feel
    like a piece of meat!
    BARRY:
    I had no idea.
    VANESSA:
    Barry, I'm sorry.
    Have you got a moment?
    BARRY:
    Would you excuse me?
    My mosquito associate will help you.
    MOOSEBLOOD:
    Sorry I'm late.
    COW:
    He's a lawyer too?

    MOOSEBLOOD:
    Ma'am, I was already a blood-sucking parasite.
    All I needed was a briefcase.
    VANESSA:
    Have a great afternoon!
     :
    Barry, I just got this huge tulip order,
    and I can't get them anywhere.
    BARRY:
    No problem, Vannie.
    Just leave it to me.
    VANESSA:
    You're a lifesaver, Barry.
    Can I help who's next?
    BARRY:
    All right, scramble, jocks!
    It's time to fly.
    VANESSA:
    Thank you, Barry!
    (Ken walks by on the sidewalk and sees the "bee-approved honey" in
    Vanessa's shop)
    KEN:
    That bee is living my life!!
    ANDY:
    Let it go, Kenny.
    KEN:
    - When will this nightmare end?!
    ANDY:
    - Let it all go.
    BARRY:
    - Beautiful day to fly.
    POLLEN JOCK:

    - Sure is.
    BARRY:
    Between you and me,
    I was dying to get out of that office.
    (Barry recreates the scene near the beginning of the movie where he flies
    through the box kite. The movie fades to black and the credits being)
    [--after credits; No scene can be seen but the characters can be heard
    talking over the credits--]
    You have got
    to start thinking bee, my friend!
     :
    - Thinking bee!
    - Me?
    BARRY:
    (Talking over singer)
    Hold it. Let's just stop
    for a second. Hold it.
     :
    I'm sorry. I'm sorry, everyone.
    Can we stop here?
    SINGER:
    Oh, BarryBARRY:
    I'm not making a major life decision
    during a production number!
    SINGER:
    All right. Take ten, everybody.
    Wrap it up, guys.
    BARRY:
    I had virtually no rehearsal for that.
    morbackSun, 05 May 2024 06:44
    I swear to fucking god, Carl. We're all going to fucking die out here, this is literally the apocalypse! We're all going to fucking die here, SHIT! FUCK! SHIT! FUCK! SHIT! FUCK! SHIT! FUCK! I WASTED MY TIME ON THIS STUPID WEBSITE FOR NOTHING!
    "
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